daily life – Page 28 – The Hermits' Rest

So Much to Be Happy About

Sure. Given the choice, I’ll choose being happy. I don’t think that was always my choice. Sometimes I chose something other than happiness. Melodrama? Ennui? Risk-taking? Emotional masochism? Whatever it was, it’s gone.

More space in my brain for wildflower appreciation.

That leaves so much room for positive experiences, contentment with whatever comes up, and inner peace. Of course, there are moments of wonder and happy times, but I’m loving the contentment I’ve achieved. More challenges will come up, but I have good tools for coping.

Speaking of challenges, I bet baby Hope will provide some, but cute ones.

Work has been fun, because I’m learning new ideas and helping out others. People are just so interesting when you just observe them and help out. I’m out of the office politics game, and love the detachment.

Just observing and noticing is way better than getting emotionally involved!

Horses are still fun, too. Today was Apache’s lesson and I got to go with Sara. That won’t happen much more in the future, so I enjoyed watching her and Aragorn trying new things.

Apache spent more time getting his hooves trimmed. I think he gets his done as much as I do. But it’s his lot in life, being metabolically challenged.

My new helmet matches all his tack. It even has cactuses on it.

We enjoyed our lesson until side passing time. We just aren’t good at that. I guess we know what to work on!

He’s a good horse. And I washed all the sweat off.

The heat is back, so I’m pretty tired. And my back hurts where I fell from Drew last week. Plus, our pool pump seems to have gone out. Always something to deal with, but hey, I’m not hospitalized like poor Kathleen has been all week (another spider bite). Tomorrow will be better, no doubt!

Maybe I’ll see the black mud daubers! No, these don’t sting you.

You Know What They Say about Good Deeds

Right? No good deed goes unpunished! I experienced one of those times today. I’m not upset at all, but shaking my head. There are just so many ways to look at things!

It’s like a scene viewed through different lenses.

I’m standing in the same spot, just using different camera settings. Things seem different, too.

Today I finally got around to do something about the bees who decided our propane tank access hole was a good place to start a hive.

They had moved under the piece of insulation we put over the pipes rather than leaving when all the rain came. It turns out bees like rain, according to Heath, the bee removal guy we called.

Thank goodness Jeremy from the Bling Box remembered this company had posted ad ad on Facebook and gave me their number. They showed up after work, having driven from Temple.

It took little time for our docile bees to get gently vacuumed up into the special bee vac (really a small shop vac with modifications). Heath got the queen and most of the workers, though a few were probably out foraging. I feel bad for them coming home to no sisterhood.

Safely sucked up. Glad my bees weren’t Africanized.

I felt good that I’d not killed them just because they inconvenienced me, and that we helped a small business.

That is, until I responded to a post in a FB group about bees dying from visiting poisoned dandelions and said I’d tried to help some honeybees. I promptly got a response lecturing me on how honeybees aren’t native and that they’re hurting native bees and that any good biologist (such as the man (of course) writing the response) knows they should be eliminated!

Even the dogs won’t look at me. Tsk tsk.

I said, “Okay, thanks.”

In my view I was helping insects who live near me. In his view I was hurting others. We both have good intentions.

Thinking about native versus nonnative can get you deep into rabbit holes. Many common living things here at the Hermits’ Rest aren’t native, like those chirping fools the house sparrows, or those mega-swarming starlings. One type of dove I hear daily is an Eurasian Collared Dove. Must be Eurasian. The wildflowers have many introduced species in their mix, too. Even the common dandelion isn’t native.

At least you aren’t going down MY rabbit hole.

What to do? Eliminate them all? Or are some so well adapted they are okay now?

Should we build a cactus border wall to keep out non natives? Oh wait. Plants can’t read maps.

I don’t t know. Maybe I’ll ask in Master Naturalists tomorrow. I want to be a good steward of my land, but I’m not sure I have the strength to scorch the earth.

Otherwise, all is well. I sure appreciate the nice feedback on yesterday’s blog entry. Having supportive folks around makes it easy to have a good life.

Community Devolvement

What do you do to be involved in the community?

I used to try my best to be involved in the community near which I live. (Is that English?) I discovered that it can be difficult to do good where you’re new and different. So in the end, I’ve devolved to doing one community outreach activity and participating in two groups of people with similar interests. That’s plenty, and at least so far, I’m still welcome in these groups.

If I can’t make friends, I can always rent them.

Obviously, I enjoy being a Texas Master Naturalist, though being President during COVID wasn’t fun. I love being able to talk to folks about our shared interests, learn about nature, and teach others. While it has its bureaucratic aspects, as organizations do, it hasn’t turn into a mean girls cult like the nonprofit I used to be involved in, and it’s not so “woke” that it turns into bullying, like the denomination I was once a member of. So far, so scientific.

The horse community I’m a part of now is another way I’m involved. We are supportive of each other and get along well, in spite of differences. I especially love how young people and elders are both respected and valued here. It’s a small but mighty community free of elitism and rampant competition. We all want to learn!

Poor Apache had sweat bubbles in his butt after his lesson. He’s getting back in shape!

Other community things I do include hanging out with mostly like-minded friends once a week and patronizing local businesses. It feels good to help keep shops and restaurants going in a small town!

Watching improvements happen is encouraging, even from a distance.

The bad experiences I had with a couple local groups were disappointing at the time, but you can’t force people to like you or want to work with you. It reminds me of a Facebook post I saw today where someone points out that you can’t control your reputation – it’s someone else’s view of you. But you can control your character – it’s who you really are. With my odd personality, I’m a hard person to like, but I try hard to be a good person.

The bad experiences I’ve had when I tried to fit in shouldn’t have surprised me but they did. Hmm.

At first, when I found out how I was viewed by some folks in the community and was asked not to represent a business I thought I was part of, I was hurt. When I was bypassed after offering my services to a community group, it stung. And when a fellow board member verbally attacked me and tried to harm family member’s reputations, but no one on the board defended me or tried to keep me from resigning, I was shocked. But these were good lessons to learn. To reiterate: you can’t make anyone like you. And it’s fine.

Now that I pick my involvement more carefully and don’t attach my self worth into belonging to anything, I feel more free to give what I can. Devolvement did me a lot of good.

(My mental health has been better than it is right now, so pardon the negativity I’m spewing. I blame all the rain.)

Branded

What are your favorite brands and why?

I think people get too attached to brands, especially when they are trying to use them to impress others. I should know. I bought a Prada purse once. It was the best buying experience I ever had. Wow, rich people get treated nicely in stores. And it was/is a great purse. It will last forever.

Purse is at right. The left one is Coach. Used them when I worked in an office. Dog is another story.

But, my brief period of trying to keep up with the Jones’s is over. I now focus any brand loyalty I develop on quality or aesthetics. Things don’t have to be “on trend” to be of good quality or pleasing to my eye. Upon reflection, I find that many of my brand loyalties are focused on comfort, ergonomics, and texture. Examples.

Current frequently worn shoes.

I love Skechers shoes. They do come in some fun colors, but mainly they are very comfortable and keep my feet happy. As someone who has a “thing” for shoes, this switch to a more practical style is a big deal.
I also love cowboy boots, especially Lucchese. Those are a texture thing. I love the feel of quality leather. Plus they are beautiful yet useful. Good ones are very comfortable, too.
I really love a well designed automobile with comfort and style. I’ve loved every Jaguar car Ive owned. My current one is a compromise, because Lee can’t get into a sedan or sports car anymore, so I lost the British Racing Green one with saddle tan leather interior. But the one I drive now has red leather seats and every safety and convenience feature I wanted. I could live in this car. It’s so easy and intuitive to use. And it goes vroom when necessary
I’m loyal to my Color Street nail strips. Yes, I know there are less expensive brands. I also find them rubbery and of lower quality. Since they’re still way less than salon nail treatments, I’m happy.
I like Apple watches and phones. Less of a learning curve. I stick with Dell computers. That’s based on familiarity and reliability.
I stick with AT&T cell service. No clue why except my dad worked for them via various mergers and name changes. That’s not a great reason.
I like H-E-B and Publix grocery stores. They are clean and have options. I can’t remember what I liked in Illinois, which had neither chain.
Let’s see, what else? Crest toothpaste, meUndies socks and underwear, Bluebell ice cream, Kerrygold butter, Church’s fried chicken, Dawn dishwashing liquid, Tide detergent, Diet Coke Zero (my primary vice), Folger’s coffee (I just like it), Hilton hotels (because that’s where my points live).

That’s enough of that. Most things I’m brand neutral on or prefer hand-made.

Flooding continues around here. It’s worse in other parts of Texas but pretty bad here. Plants and ducks love it.

Where the cattle were yesterday.

Looking north up Walkers Creek. You can barely see a fence top.

Walkers Creek headed south

The other side of the trees in the previous photo. That’s usually a field.

Wood ducks irritated at my presence

Horses aren’t pleased. At least Apache is finally shedding out. I can pull clumps of hair off him. I’d planned to groom him twice today and at least walk Drew around, but there was only one good break in the rain. When I went to feed and medicate, he was too wet to brush.

Lots of hair. More still left.

More rain is coming. Oh boy.

It’s Like Riding a Bicycle – Information, Not Advice

List the people you admire and look to for advice…

Okay, I’m not going to list everyone I admire! Some of them do t want to be blogged about, anyway. And advice? An organization I used to work for had a catchphrase something like, “Offer information, don’t give advice.” I rarely ask for advice these days. But I appreciate information from trusted sources.

That said, I have always found doing tarot card readings to be a way of providing information and perspectives without giving advice. You get some ideas from archetypal images and let the person you’re reading for draw their own conclusions. Ideally.

Celtic cross with significator, using Babylonian Tarot.

I hadn’t been reading cards much. The reading above was years ago in a previous post. Since 2018, I haven’t really wanted any insights into things around me, sort of feeling like ignorance may be bliss. But I’ll read if asked.

So today I was asked. I then realized my favorite Robin Wood deck was hiding somewhere in my Austin house stuff. And I was feeling rusty, especially since the only deck I could find that wasn’t overly cutesy was one with alternative names for suits, and worse, had labels on the cards giving them meanings I didn’t necessarily want to hear.

This cheerful card did come up. The good news is no one can stab you any more. They’re out of swords.

However, the reading went fine. Like riding a bicycle, it all comes back. I just love looking at what is laid out and seeing a gestalt of what the cards are hinting at before looking at details. That is FUN. And helping people with problems look at things from a new perspective is rewarding. (Plus I got to talk to an old friend.)

Maybe if I locate one of the decks I’m more comfortable with, I’ll do more, just not for me or my family. I have a friend who’s a professional tarot reader who doesn’t do family readings.

(I’m sure somewhere in this blog I talk more about out tarot and how I use it, so in a few words, no I don’t predict the future and no it’s not a parlor trick. It’s intuition and archetypes.)

I’m glad I was home and able to spontain a tarot reading, since not much else happened today. More rain and wetness! 100% humidity means I had big hair. I did get to see a big ole jackrabbit, which is pretty rare here, and continued to get the buntings more comfortable with me. I enjoy both the painted and indigo ones singing and flitting around.

You can practically tell that this is a bird! They’re getting closer!

I hope you have trustworthy advisors, but even more, I hope you have the wisdom to make your own decisions based on good information, and if you get a tarot reading, don’t take it literally. That’s my advice.

Innate Direction

What gives you direction in life?

After the hiccups this week, I’m ready for a shift in direction, but I don’t really need one. Little challenges help keep me focused on the big picture, not the tiny dots that make up the totality.

It’s like the temperature blanket, which I need to look at like this every so often, to see the winter flowing into spring. Mostly I look at individual squares.

Today’s challenge was getting stung by a scorpion, even though I’d checked my boots before putting them inn(from now on they don’t stay outside, even if they got all muddy in the stuck-in-the-water challenge earlier in the week). And hey, the intense pain makes me forget the hurt of my big-ass hoof-shaped bruise from Tuesday’s challenge! And I feel the itching from the chigger bites I got in the woods yesterday celebrating May.

It rained a lot, and we kept seeing crawfish crossing the driveway. I almost stepped on the one trying to disguise itself as a leaf. I avoided a crawfish pinch!

It’s all pretty funny at this point, and it reminds me that my direction is shaped by my innate desire to learn how things work. Mostly I want to observe life around me and determine patterns. Today I carefully noted all the different vireos and warblers that have appeared in the last few days. There was even a rose-breasted grosbeak, not common here. I’m curious as to how long they’ll visit during migration.

Yes, this is my best warbler photo. No idea which one it is.

Where I hope I’m headed is to even more internal peace and calm. Watching the seasons repeat yearly with variations but an overall consistency grounds me more and more. I think I’ll need that in the coming months.

I’m driven to try to understand people, as well. Like many of us, some of the things groups of people are saying and doing confuse me, but I’m doing better at seeing how much of it stems from humans needing to belong. Tribalism is not pretty when one feels threatened. I like it much better when it’s about football teams.

Did someone say threat? I better get hopping!

I’m wandering, so blame the Benadryl I took. But I want to recommend a television show we’ve been watching that has been very good for my soul. It’s A Brief History of the Future, which is streaming on PBS. The show looks into where humanity is headed in positive as well as negative ways. I’ve learned a lot about ideas that can heal the planet and make life better for all people. It celebrates differences and commonalities. Worth watching!

Like floods, it all passes. The green in the pond is the usual shore, and the shiny area in back is water pouring in.

I hope you’re enjoying the direction in which you’re headed. I love the daily surprises, both fun and painful. My hope is that they balance out so there’s never a dull moment unless we want one.

Beltane Invocation

Beltane reminds me how I’m part of the whole. Sometimes you just need to stand in the woods and feel like you’re a part of it. Bugs, birds, buds, and me. It helps you gain perspective. So I wrote a little invocation with pictures.

Look at the world from a new perspective

Early Beltane Greetings

What is your favorite holiday? Why is it your favorite?

I’m not very big on holidays, but I enjoy observing the changing seasons. May 1 is Beltane in the tradition I follow. It’s the big fertility celebration where all the flowers are blooming and you dance around the maypole, a thing I’ve done many times.

This cheerful day flower welcomes the changing seasons.

I like a holiday that’s all for fun, isn’t commercialized, and provides a chance to be as wild as you want to be. I’ll probably pick a May basket full of flowers and make a nice bouquet tomorrow.

That will be after my doctor appointment, where I have to get tests done to be allowed to continue my thyroid medication, followed by the equine dentist, another yearly traditional event at the ranch. I hope I can worm the horses while they’re sedated. That should end the parade of horse health expenses for a while.

Today was a first for me in a couple of ways. First, Drew kicked me for daring to try to groom his right side. He really doesn’t want me grooming him, so I guess I’ve been a bad horse owner and traumatized him.

I feel pretty awful about that and confused about what to do. On the one hand I’m supposed to be firm and set boundaries and on the other I’m not supposed to react. I’ll keep trying. My thigh sure hurts. Interesting that he doesn’t mind me cleaning 3/4 of his hooves, and is happy to be haltered and walk with me.

Second, I gave a living being a shot of medicine. Yes, this was after getting kicked. Drew was fine about that. He gets a shot a month from now on for arthritis pain. I’m proud I remembered how to do it. Maybe Tarrin will think I still have some potential as a horse person.

Speaking of pain and meds, Apache is feeling lots better. I’m pleased that he’s walking and trotting well without the boots on. He volunteered to canter but I had him stop. It wasn’t going well and he was hopping. Still, good news that he tried. He seemed energetic.

Also good is that he is now taking his medication like a champ, thanks to the magical cookies Sara made for Aragorn. Aragorn didn’t like them, but Apache seems to look forward to them. I guess I’ll have to get the recipe!

No new Apache pictures, so enjoy this very large mushroom.

Kathleen says this is my week for challenges, after getting stuck in the mud yesterday and kicked today. I’m trying to adopt her attitude of laughing the challenges off and staying positive.

Risky Moves

Describe a risk you took that you do not regret.

One risk I took was buying and moving into property in a rural part of a state full of people who don’t like people like me. I was concerned that we hermits of the Hermits’ Rest would be truly isolated, other than the folks next door.

I’d always lived in small cities or suburbs, not rural properties. I didn’t know if I’d be able to adapt to the challenges of living with no HOA to keep things tidy, no convenient shopping areas with a Walgreens and a Starbucks every few blocks, and plenty of biting and stinging creatures lurking everywhere.

Prickly pears do have thorns, but it’s wonderful when they bloom.

I’m so glad I discovered I’m quite flexible, I can adapt, and there are plenty of people here that enjoy people like me. I treasure the wide variety of friends I’ve made in this small town, rich and poor, conservative and liberal alike. And it’s such a privilege to have family in our little commune. I’d never have known this was possible without taking the risk of joining Lee in his retirement dreams.

And I’d never have learned so much about the natural world around me. That’s a green heron.

Now I’m the one taking care of livestock, understanding where the dangers are as well as the wonders, and learning new skills every day. I’m bemused by visitors in their shorts and flip flops running from every flying insect and prickly plant. Or worse, being afraid of chickens, horses, or dogs. (You can respect them without fearing them.)

Apache feels as if I don’t respect him, by washing him with medication and putting so much on his legs. But that’s stopping flies!

It takes all kinds, of course, and I’m glad there are options. I bet I could even find community and new things to learn in a downtown of a city. Maybe in my 80s…

Speaking of friends, I’ve come to view Ssssally here as a friend. Might as well.

Five Happy Things

What are 5 everyday things that bring you happiness?

I’m truly grateful to be surrounded by things that make me happy. To paraphrase Maya Angelou, every day is a good day, since I’ve never seen it before.

I never had a chicken inspect the tack room until today!

So, five everyday things that make me happy?

1. Being near trees. Trees always feel like my protectors.

Sometimes trees have birds in them. Double happiness!

2. Watching the dogs play. Penney and Carlton run and run while Goldie waits to tackle them.

3. Working on my journal. I love to write by hand, plus I get all my childhood arts and crafts joy back when I pick colored pens and washi tape stickers.

Journal of a few years ago. Not my bullet journal.

4. Putting on nail polish. That’s another simple way to be creative and play with colors. Hmm, knitting is the same kind of thing.

5. Moving around. I used to think I was a sedentary slug, but as I’ve gotten older I realize that I was always happy when moving around. I loved walking and riding my bike, then I loved aerobics and yoga, and now I love riding horses. I hope I can always walk, at least.

Horse update: Apache is still sore but can get around. He got painkillers today, though he didn’t like it much, so Mabel and Dusty are probably feeling good tonight.

Drew is still sore from all his injections, and he still has a few to go, but he should start feeling better very soon. I’m glad he’s being well cared for.

Everyone else is unhappy about flies and very happy about food.

As for me, my lower back is still unhappy. I may have to get it worked on. Ugh.

But I got my yearly recertification done for Master Naturalists, and I even went to a party yesterday, for my friend who’s retiring as the head of our local Chamber of Commerce. They will need two people to replace her! Neither of them will be me.

Oh, and today Anita and I went to a Hat Bar at a local shop. I should not have been introduced to this concept. Too much fun, again, probably because it reminds me of my childhood crafts obsession.

I’d love to know some everyday happiness YOU experience!