I’m so tired. Trying to work and take in the negativity in the world takes a lot of energy.
The best part of the day was that it warmed up enough to go sit with the birds for a half hour after work. Bluebirds were singing and singing for some reason, which was heavenly. And so many woodpeckers, including Flickers, added to the chorus.
That helped.
Tomorrow is a long day of stressful meetings. At least there are few days like that in this job.
Just keep doing your best. That’s my goal.
I said yesterday that the light was coming, and I really felt it today, and not just because we’re halfway between the winter solstice and spring equinox! Not that I’m complaining that the sun is setting later, because I enjoyed the sunset and full moon tonight.
I just feel lighter and a little more positive after a few small pieces of good news, and I enjoyed good conversations with friends again. I need to keep this friendliness streak going! It’s hard when most of your friends trend towards the hermit lifestyle just like we do.
Our friends Martha and Mike, who often invite themselves to Sunday dinner, struggle like Lee and I do to make the effort, but we all praise Martha for making the rest of us spend time together. At least we admit our struggles to each other. You feel lots less alone when you figure out we all have challenges to push through.
All in all I enjoyed my day of finishing my red solidarity hat, donning my Imbolc t-shirt, and gazing at the candles on my Brigid altar.
I was even able to spend a little time birding once it warmed up a little, since it was sunny and calm. A Belted Kingfisher flew right over my head! Now it has to warm up enough for me to sit out and see the Bald Eagle that’s hanging out here.
I can’t miss the turkeys though. Darryl Junior really wants to fly, and his legs pound the dirt like a herd of elephants as he runs and flaps his wings. Good exercise, I guess! Both the birds and horses seem glad for the slight warming trend. Tomorrow should be practically balmy, at least in the 60s.
Enough rambling for one day. I’m all rested and ready to tackle another work week.
Today I did so many items on the to-do list, but at the end of the day, I didn’t feel very accomplished. I was trying to get my chores done so I could spend some time in contemplation, which is what I usually do for this time of year, Imbolc or Candlemas.
One of the things people did in the past was sweep out the house and clean the hearth, as the goddess/saint of this time of year is Brigid, patron saint of Ireland, fire, keeping house, and spinning. Among other things.
No wonder I’ve been in such a frenzy of tidying up (though it may not look like it everywhere In the house). I usually light a bunch of candles, but I will tomorrow night.
Chores are things that repeat over and over, just like cleaning your living space, so it’s appropriate I spent so much time getting my journal ready for a new month, cataloging all the birds I’ve seen in January, getting food ready to cook…etc., all of which mostly matters to only me.
The fowl were happy that one chore was buying a new supply of feed and scratch, along with new meal worms. I wish I could trust the local feed store, because I hate having to drive to the next town to get this stuff and horse feed. It took forever to organize the food, because somehow mice had gotten into my supposedly sealed food bin, so I had to chase them around and scoop them out. Plus there was a rather bold field rat who I had to chase out (not one of the cute cotton rats, a BIG one. I’m about tired of rats. Why don’t those cats I keep seeing eat them?
And to top it off, lifting the heavy feed bags messed up a nail. Oh yeah, weekly manicure is also a chore, though fun.
At least I was able to get the horses fed and watered while it was above freezing. They are eating like, well, horses. I’m glad I have a lot of hay and that mice can’t get in their food bins.
When I finally got to be indoors, I had to do minutes of the Master Naturalist board meeting from Thursday and put up a blog post. By the time I was done with computer work, my contemplation time was no longer available. A bit of yarn work was all I could fit in. I was disappointed to not finish my hat tonight, but I’ll make it (and finishing January on the temperature blanket) a priority for tomorrow.
Chores never end. Still, stop and acknowledge the change of seasons when you can. The light is coming back!
Oh my, I don’t even recognize myself this week. You see, one of my “features” is that I love organizing things, but paradoxically, I let things get very disorganized when I get upset about whatever it is. (Expect a disorganized tack room in the future).
When I was a younger person, all my books were organized by fiction, nonfiction, and crafts, and in high school I made my own card catalog and record album catalog. No Excel yet to make spreadsheets. So I’ve always liked cataloging and organizing objects I love.
As a teen, I also loved nail polish and organized my bottles by color, along with my friend Lynn. It kept us out of trouble!
I still love nail polish, an odd but fairly harmless hobby. I’ve found that I enjoy nail strips made from real polish to work well for me. I’m good at putting them on (due to being crafty), and they remove with plain nail polish remover—so much easier on my nails than salon manicures. Um, this is all to say that in the past 4-5 years I’ve worn and accumulated some strips. (understatement)
So, my pusher…I mean nail lady…hooked me up with an app that tracks the stuff I use. I entered all the ones I’d already used (I’d posted it in a Facebook group) and then entered all the ones I have, conveniently organized by color and such. I do like organization. Voilà.
and more
But hey. It’s organized! Now go off and laugh at me for having a weird and wasteful hobby. I don’t blame you and also don’t care. I think we’re all entitled to odd pastimes as long as they aren’t putting us deep in debt. And I’m not. I realize that this, and a few other hobbies (yarn, shoes) will have to go bye-bye once I retire and am on a fixed income. I’m already not spending as much on horses…
So instead of worrying about all that, I’m doing that organizing stuff I do every few years or so. Yep. That’s the rate at which I organize my craft material. Thanks to those fine new shelves I wrote about last time, I took advantage of having more space in my office closet to drag all my yarn and craft books out of the storage container and put them away.
I’m ridiculously proud of myself for getting this done. I got rid of a lot of stuff I don’t need, and collected many odds and ends of very nice yarn to share with my next-door neighbor. Many boxes went out the door! Yes! I de-cluttered!
Of course, the books are not in any order yet, and I need to sort the yarn by weight better than it is now. At least I have pretty stuff to look at, and all my needles are in one place. I had too many things in too many tote bags. That’s a common knitter/crocheter thing!
I also have my embroidery, needlepoint, and weaving stuff all together. I know where everything is for the first time since I left my house in Brushy Creek. That feels good.
Here I go down my emotional wormhole…
In this big clean-up, I got rid of a lot of the emotional baggage from people who made doing my hobby less than fun. It’s like with the horses—I need to separate the things I love (knitting, horses) from people who hurt me deeply. It’s about time in that knitting thing! But I got through the La Leche League stuff, the mean dog guy here in Cameron, and (mostly) my psychotic sister. I can do this!
So, I wonder if I’m brave enough to tackle my clothes closet? I have so much to pare down there. It needs a cleanse of negative energy! Who’s hiding in there?
I have a couple of crafty updates on something other than my temperature blanket, for once. Oooh, aah.
First, my craft closet has been in a state of disrepair for a few months, because one of the shelves Lee put up for me collapsed and spread all kinds of mess, including hundreds of photos, all over the floor. And I admit that I had little motivation to fix it back up, because there just weren’t enough shelves in it to hold my vast holdings of books, yarn, needles, looms, etc.
Yes, I have two simple looms, one Cricket and one Navajo. I would actually like to make some tapestry and such. Later. You know, when I retire. Ha ha.
Anyway, my personal contractor/child, who’s been helping out with some projects here, made me a new, sturdier shelf to replace the broken one plus a few more to turn what was once a clothing closet into the craft closet I’ve been wanting for 12 years. I feel so pampered!
There was a narrow area that just cried out to have more shelves, so he put some there, too. I thought it was nice of him to make them match, even though I said there was no need to paint them. I’m the only one who will be looking in there.
Now my den area is still full of yarn and endless tote bags of sad unfinished projects. I should be able to organize everything in the next few days though I may need to think about yarn organization. Some I’m giving
One of the good things about going through my yarn and needles is that I found things that I could used (in addition to my depressing basket of sock yarn that moths attacked). I located all my sets of circular needles, all of which were missing size 4, the size I use most. I suspect I’ll find those among some of my WIPs (works in progress). I think a few of those may end up being frogged (rip it, rip it) and the needles put back into circulation.
It’s okay, though, because I finally found the set of short size 4 tips and a shorter cable. This has enabled me to start a new hat with some beautiful red wool I found. So far it’s an inch of K1 P1 ribbing.
I already finished one hat of this pattern, which knitters around the US are making as a sign of solidarity with friends and family who are in places where fear is growing. I couldn’t find enough red yarn last week to finish my first try, so I made one in a gray gradient (Mandala) acrylic yarn. I added a red tassel. It came out great and I can wear it without looking silly.
I didn’t enjoy the needles I found, which were aluminum with pretty stiff cables for knitting in the round. The yarn is not annoying for acrylic, either. But I’m enjoying the nice Peruvian wool, wooden needle, and flexible center very much.
It’s pleasing to have more craft work to do, since I have no more horse lessons and it’s been too cold and soggy to walk or ride. I found even more red yarn (a beautiful Malabrigo) but I can see it’s a moth victim. Never fear, though, I ordered some inexpensive wool from Michael’s so I can make a couple more for non-crafty friends.
Naturally, looking at all my “stuff” reminded me of my unfinished needlepoint and some cross stitching I once wanted to do. Hmm. What will I switch to? I vow to pass some of my stash on to others though, especially since my next-door neighbor is crocheting up a storm.
I’m hopeful that life is settling down a bit, at least on the home front. It’s back to being normally cold for here. That’s a relief. And tomorrow I won’t write a post full of knitting jargon!
What books do you want to read?
Look! A prompt I haven’t already answered! And on a day I’m too tired of thinking to write anything coherent. So, sure, I’ll tell you what books I’d like to read!
I want to read books about horses, birds, dogs, wildlife, native plants, and weird nature facts. I want to read about science, language, and (factual) history. I want to read about ways to make the world a better place and the people who do so.
I want to read about fiber arts, fiber artists, and the history of everyday things. I want to read about architecture, interior design, and clothing design to learn more about creating beautiful spaces and cozy surroundings.
I want to read about how to keep my mind and body healthy and how to nurture relationships with others.
I want to read stories about ordinary people facing life’s challenges in ways that inspire me and make me laugh.
I’ll never run out of things to read. Being able to read and write is one privilege I cling to with deep gratitude. It’s hard to separate “me” from all the words (and images) around me. And I treasure the unique words and images of others. I’d rather read a messy and ungrammatical article than something made bland and perfect by machines.
Wishing safety and warmth to all of us still dealing with cold, ice, and snow.
By William Dower, PhD
I struggle with the fact that even humans who have been provided every advantage, and who want for no material things, can choose to kill another human, apparently simply because they believe they can do so without any external consequences. I want to understand why some people behave this way. I want to live in a world where we could find these people before they cause harm, and do something to stop their violent behavior.
The way nature works, both ‘human nature’ and human societal behavior are subject to Darwin’s laws. For millions of years, there has been some benefit to those individuals and societies who show violent tendencies. A person who would kill other humans that they regarded as ‘other’ could have more offspring. A clan or society that killed or dominated their neighbors could expand into that territory.
It is reasonable to believe that throughout pre-history, many groups of humans developed societies that were peaceful. An isolated pacifist group could thrive. But the group would be easy prey. A violent outside group, or even an individual born in the group who was violent, could take over. The genes for such violent behavior would then increase in succeeding generations, at least to the point that there was so much violence and murder that the society began to fail because of it.
All human societies face this balance: be peaceful enough to cooperate, and violent enough to expand and fend off the attacks of other groups.
While we grieve and try to understand the current homicidal attacks on our peaceful neighbors, we should keep in mind that these violent and dangerous people are to be expected, and we must cooperate and anticipate them, if we want to prevent their taking over.
[Shared with permission from one of my most thoughtful and dear friends. Copyright 2026. ]
The cold front arrived and we got down to 16°F, with a high of only 24° so my blanket square for today will be all purple! That and getting to watch this hawk on my big stump were the big highlights for my day.
With our fairly rough expectations in previous arctic blasts, our local family were all pleased we had heat (only got down to 64° downstairs and upstairs kept normal 67°). We were very relieved to find that the turkeys DID use their hut last night and most of today. I put water inside the chicken coop so they only had to go out to eat. It was kind of fun watching them skate around to get to food.
The horses spent a lot of time in their shelter, and had water, because Spice broke the ice with her hooves. She’s an equine survivalist. Tomorrow it should get above freezing and we will pry the food dishes out of the ice and they will be happier. They ate food off the ice just fine, though.
I spent most of the day bundled up under my 2025 blanket working on another hat with gray ombré yarn. I’ll add a red tassel! Oh, and there was football to watch and more people to talk to on phone, Zoom, and otherwise (young people next door came here for warm showers). That’s not bad for a cozy shut-in day!
I did want to say one thing about current events: if you do not feel safe expressing yourself in front of other people, you’re not being unsupportive; you’re protecting yourself. Do whatever you can, as much as you can, but don’t let peer pressure bring on guilt. Some of us have safety in numbers and the means to do more than others. The goal is for most of us in this country to make it through this difficult time and emerge safe, strong, and ready to rebuild broken relationships and institutions.
I sound so optimistic. But it’s good to have hope.
One of the benefits of everyone being home all day waiting for bad weather (it only just now got sleety here) is that there’s lots of time to talk. Or text. Or message. I did those things most of the day. It brought a lot of comfort to me. Yes, I’m chatty Susie.
Thanks to pretty much my entire family, my old friends, my current friends, and my “daughter” for being there for me today.
If the weather is still bad where you are tomorrow, take a break from your cocooning activity and text, call, message, or write a letter, depending on your generational preference. Heck, I got stationery in the mail today (from a friend in Canada!) so I should write some letters, too!
Knowing we have people who care for us will help us get through these trying times. No one can take away our love in our hearts.
Blessed be.
The first wave of the long-awaited bad weather has arrived at last. So far we have had enough rain to at least make a dent in the dryness. Heck, this morning the mist was so heavy that the screened porch had water dripping down the screens. Here’s where we were earlier today.
That’s all rain. I guess tomorrow or later tonight the snow comes. Or not. Who knows? In any case we parked the motorhome in front of the garage, so it will be out of the north wind. And the generator is working!
If you don’t get a blog for a couple of days understand I’m just conserving energy. We and our animals will be fine. I’ll keep knitting my red hat and temperature blanket.
Stay safe everyone! Except certain people who escaped to the beach (and you know who you are). Nah, I want everyone safe. And warm.
The Hermits' Rest 