I don’t think anyone I know hasn’t made sacrifices, mainly since I’m no longer hanging around with people who think of no one but themselves. I’m also fairly sure that many sacrifices have positive outcomes. For example, the sacrifice I made to stay home with my sons when they were young ended up leading to meeting so many lifelong friends and my career path. So maybe it wasn’t a sacrifice; it was a good decision.
Maybe I sacrificed a dream to send Drew away, but we are all calmer now.
That’s the thing. Most of the “sacrifices” I’ve made no longer bother me. I honestly don’t feel like dwelling on them. One thing is I wish I had been able to travel overseas when I was younger. But the money was needed for other important things, like college educations and helping out family members. And now that we might have the means to travel to other countries, Lee won’t fly.
If I’m home, I can see when new plants bloom. Violet Ruellia has started.
Not traveling as much lets us invest in our home, though. I’m looking forward to some of the improvements we’ve been discussing, like finishing the pool house and getting the water tanks working. Admittedly, getting more grass in the horse pastures means fewer spectacular wildflowers, but I can sacrifice some of them if we can get native grasses.
We have to save some for the butterflies, like this variegated fritillary.
Everything’s really okay. We can each sacrifice something for the good of us all, at least here. Finding acceptance of how things are has truly made my life happier.
We planted the fig tree in time for more rain. I just hope the wind doesn’t break it.
I’m still easily tired and low on energy, but I’m glad I was able to go to see the incredible Purple Mountain colony maintained by Mike McCormick and his family near Buckholts. Not only were the birds (a type of swallow) beautiful to watch, but I enjoyed finding plenty of plants, too.
Two stunning males taking a break from insect hunting.
This huge setup of houses and a “condo” is one of the largest in the US. It’s the result of a lifetime of work. We are lucky to be nearby and that our Master Naturalist group has been friends for years.
View from the colony
The setting couldn’t be more beautiful, in a hilly ranch with mixed fields and woods. There are plenty of ponds to attract insects and keep the birds hydrated.
Pond, cattle, and chickens share the land with martins.
It’s a lot of work maintaining all the nest sites, but it’s a labor of love for the whole family. They’ve been responsible for many Martin housing innovations that they share with others, too. There’s a devoted group of Martin lovers throughout North America who provide homes for these birds while the raise their babies each summer who share information.
Two females in the condo, taking a break from egg incubation.
I enjoyed learning new things about these birds, which surprised me since I’ve been educated often about them. For example, larger hawks ignore them, but Cooper’s and Sharp-shinned find martins tasty. Ah, nature.
The houses and condo unit. It holds lots of birds. There are up to 2,000 pairs in good years.
I couldn’t resist the other life around the property. There were plenty of hens and roosters, plus chicks. And there were beautiful white domestic doves fluttering around (as well as Mourning, White Winged, and Inca Doves). The shed area had Barn Swallows nesting in it, so we got to watch them zooming around, too. And a pretty brave rabbit.
Hen and chicksChicken in the bitterweed PrettyDove worldBarn Swallow nest
After I got tired of being around people, I walked on the little nature trail they’ve built since I was last there. It has very nice bathrooms, too. I had lots of fun adding 75 or so observations for iNaturalist on the trail and in the fields, when I wasn’t distracted by how beautiful the views of the countryside were.
It is a privilege to see this place again and to learn even more about these migratory birds and the environment where they spend their spring and summer, after flying in from Brazil.
I got this book at the Ladybird Johnson Wildflower Center. I’m sure glad I did, because I thoroughly it and learned how many things right outside the house are delicious. Foraging Texas: Finding, Identifying, and Preparing Edible Wild Foods, in Texas (2021), by Eric M. Knight and Stacy M. Coplin, is the most fun and sensible foraging guide I ever read.
The authors, who apparently know my friend Linda Jo, strike a great balance e between caution and curiosity as they teach about edible plants. First, they insist you read the chapter on toxic plants, some of which I could go take you to right now (very healthy poison ivy vines). I do now know my water hemlock and friends, and simply won’t eat anything growing in the water, at all. Even the yummy ones might have pollutants in them. Sigh.
Sample page
The authors focus on plants that are plentiful (many, if not most, non-native) so as not to encourage folks to contribute to a species going extinct. You’re heartily encouraged to eat annoying plants like bastard cabbage (they tell you to pull it up after you harvest the flowers, which proves to me that they have met Linda Jo). That woman hates bastard cabbage.
Bastard cabbage submitted by me to iNaturalist.
For each plant there’s a map of where to find it, a thorough botanical description (there’s an index of terms), comparison with any toxic lookalikes, how to harvest, and a recipe. Some recipes are like, just eat it. Other plants seem so hard to harvest that I wonder if it’s worth it. So many stickers and prickles to remove in your prickly pear fruit (tuna) or heart-leaf nettles. I’d say I’ll pass, but those fruit are so tasty.
Prickly pear with developing fruit at top. 2024.
Very few other plants are described as tasting delicious (dewberries are!). Most are okay.
Unripe dewberries, 2024.
I think the fun is mostly finding edible plants around you and knowing what’s a good hiking snack.
Found these today. You can eat flowers and roots, pink evening primrose.
Today I ate plantain seeds, because there are many in the pasture right now. I’m not going to go gather a bunch to share with the family. I could sneak chickweed in a salad, though. It’s tasty.
Bracted plantain. Much prettier than the kind I ate.
I will probably keep this reference book in the RV for reference when traveling. There are more comprehensive foraging books out there, but I like that this one covers the area where I live and is enjoyable to read. Now enjoy some pasture flowers.
Pink lemon beebalm Full pond! Bitter weedBlister beetle
Like many other rural parts of the US, the county we live in is having lots and lots of farmland bought up to either produce energy or use a lot of it. We have seas of solar farms stretching for miles that were corn or cattle just a few years ago.
Google’s largest solar farm. Right in our county. Opened in 2024. Photo from KTBX.
We are also seeing land sold for our benevolent buddies, AI data centers. There’s a big one going in north of here and I’ve noticed a new electrical substation going in down the road from us, as if there wasn’t already one a mile or so away.
This is under construction now. (I miss Micah Wilson—he was too good to be stuck in our small market)
As you may be aware, data centers use a lot of water. So do suburbs in the adjacent county. (I’m aware that data center proponents assert they recycle water, and I’m sure some of that does occur. But anyway, much of the water in our aquifer is going to people and places who aren’t us.
Many folks in this part of Texas are concerned about our water sources, and concerned about drought, as well. So, Lee decided we should get some giant rainwater storage tanks.
Why look, here come some tanks now!
There are two 5,000 gallon tanks now in our back yard. Each will collect water from one of our roofs, the house and the garage. I’m told we can also supplement with city water if necessary, but the hope is to get all our water this way.
Fascinating to dogs
Yes, there are filters and stuff. I’m supposed to go to some class about it, after which I can speak more knowledgeably about it. Until then, I shall trust the family member who did take the class already to set it up.
Big
The pad for the garage tank was already built, so now the second pad has to be built and the tank loaded on it. Because of how many water lines, gas lines, and such there are beside the house, the tank will have to block the guest room window. But the residents never open the blinds anyway.
Lowering the trailer First tank is offYou can see where tank #2 will go. Lowering the second tankIn place. The door could still be used!Compare Lee to the tank Both tanks. I like that they match the house. Markers where the new concrete pad will go.
I didn’t think this would happen so soon, but it’s good, I guess. Those data centers can take all the groundwater, but we will still have some as long as we get at least some rain. Yay?
No blog yesterday, because the day didn’t feature anything worth mentioning to the blogosphere. Today wasn’t much more exciting, since I was mostly problem solving issues of no interest to anyone other than me and a couple of coworkers. At least my mind is occupied!
Some birds are still hiding. This Green Heron thought it was invisible.
It’s been a nice couple of days full of interesting birds, like a Canada Warbler, which of course didn’t pose. We’re getting quite a variety these days.
I enjoyed a visit with this friendly Lark Sparrow. They are brave little guys.
The highlight of the day, at least for those of us in the household who do horse care, is that more work is being done around the pens (rain slowed progress down, but all the rails are back up!). I heard noises outside, and when I checked it out, the tractor was busy moving dirt from the big pile that created our tiny pond into the pens.
Note the lack of puddle.
The dirt has smoothed out the areas than have sunken in since Kathleen bought sand to put in the pens when they were first finished. The mud from rains, especially where it dripped off the shelter roof, is very slick and no fun for horses or people.
Much smoother
We hope this will help drainage, but it’s been pointed out that the new dirt will just make new and different puddles. And it’s darned clay-ish in this part of the property.
Butterflies drink from the clay mud. It has minerals.
It sounds like the shelter extension will go up soon. It will have a gutter that will drain away from the pens and give the horses a much nicer shelter and a dry shaded place for grooming, hoof trimming, and veterinary stuff.
Bonus photo of a Ruby-throated Hummingbird.
There are even rumors of a concrete pad for bathing. I don’t know…that sounds awfully fancy! It’s fun to dream of, though. And Apache could sure use a bath!
I’m too sleepy to write much. We were all kept awake last night from a combination of very loud wind and thunderstorms and upset dogs barking.
I tried to dream of peaceful meadows.
Plus we had a bonus dog who wandered onto our porch just before it started to hail. We couldn’t leave him outside in that! Besides, he looked familiar.
I don’t like storms.
Dogs, especially intact males, tend to run off when frightened, and that’s what this guy did. I’m glad we took him inside! He was obviously well cared for and loved people and other dogs. He went to the guest room for the night, to separate him from our guys who didn’t need a new dog in addition to thunder.
Even a nice looking guy like this would be too much.
I posted that we had him on our local lost and found page, figuring we’d check neighbors we didn’t know in the morning if we got no response. By 11pm a preteen girl texted that it was her dog. I asked for proof, since I didn’t want to just give him to someone random who thought he was cute.
Yep same dog. Note Frenchie peeking in back.
By morning I recognized the girl’s name and realized that Benny (his name) used to live next door to my friend Anita in town. Aha. I’d seen him. The family had moved sort of near us. I say sort of, because Benny had made it 2.8 miles to get to our house!
Ready to go home.
We were pleased to reunite Benny with his family and home pack. I’m also glad they knew he was safe in the storm.
Yes, we had enough rain to finally fill the ponds and send the creek over its banks.
Front pond full!It overflowed!Little pond didn’t fill but looks goodCreek is overflowing Other side of bridgeLook closely and you can see mud on leaves that shows how high the water got.
Now I am more confident we will have water all through this year’s dry spell.
That’s good. We turtles like a full pond.
PS: heard that Drew is a regular angel in his new situation and already trail riding. Happy trails to Droodles.
I’m glad it rained, too, because even though I am on the patio, I’m a baby water snake. (just a little guy)
I’m grieving the fact that my horse Drew has gone to greener pastures (literally, east Texas, where it’s damp). I’m grateful for all the very kind words from many of you. It will just take me a few days to feel more centered.
At least I’m happy that I got my fig tree that friends were holding for me. Yay Figgy.
Today reminded me of something I’ve noticed before when I experienced grief. I get really accident prone. This is apparently a known consequence of grieving, in addition to memory lapses and decreased spatial senses (thanks AI). I didn’t put 2 and 2 together and figure out why I was so “off” today until this evening. Now I get it.
Like this mushroom, I’m not quite right.
Nothing bad happened, I just had odd accidents. For example, I was operating the gate to go to the garage and somehow got my thumbnail stuck in the link of a chain in the locking mechanism. That caused me to drop the can of Precious Coke Zero I was carrying. I extricated myself without breaking my freshly painted nail. But when I got into the Jeep to go get Figgy, I foolishly opened the can. Soda all over my clean jeans. Sigh.
Not broken nail.
I later dropped the phone (it’s fine) and scratched myself on the gate to the chickens. At least I got two eggs today!
Connie can squeeze out some big ones.
And finally, after serving myself some comfort ice cream, I sat down to eat it, and it all plopped out of the bowl onto my cute shirt and the already soda-stained jeans. Sheesh.
I’m off, too.
I have heard that horses “grieve” the loss of a herd member. I wonder if the remaining four here are grieving or having the most relaxed day in years? I’m not sure. I did ride Apache today, as you could guess from the photo above. He’s getting back into the swing of things again, though being sick hasn’t helped the progress. He did great in the round pen today, but as soon as I walked him out of it, he did an Apache fit and I thought he was going to buck his way back to the barn. But, ha! I remembered the one-rein stop. He stopped.
He had a look on his face like he was very disappointed I remembered how to do that. And I competently got him to follow or lead Dusty and Kathleen around the outside of the pen until he quit thinking about exiting. At least Tarrin taught me something!
My vision for the future. So many chickadees.
Things will improve, I’m sure. We got some good rain this evening. And I got through another Mother’s Day burying my grief over my estranged son. It helped that my other son remembered me and so did my bonus daughter up near Dallas (two weeks until her son is due!).
Oops. The weather service just called. Big storm coming. Lee is bringing Figgy inside the screened porch!
This is difficult to write, because I’m in danger of veering off into blaming myself, berating myself for being such a wimp, etc. But the goal of this post is to focus on what’s best for everyone.
Nope. Dusty isn’t going anywhere. Kathleen now rides him for hours!
As you may know, my little gray gelding, Drew or Droodles, has had some issues ever since he got kicked in the head by Fiona (mini-donkey). His boundaries are not good, and it takes constant vigilance to remind him to give humans and other horses space. Consequently, my son got kicked by him and had spleen damage, I got knocked into a metal fence rail and needed stitches, and just this week, Kathleen got crowded into a fence and kicked. Not to mention damage inflicted on other horses. I just can’t have any more injuries caused by my horse. (Note that I can go on and on about his good qualities—I love him.)
He’s beautiful (and chubby)
We had already been trying to find him a place where he’d fit in better. We had decided that he needed somewhere he’d be worked with every day by experienced horse people, and where he could have a job.
These guys need to be in a calm environment, too.
Kathleen’s stepson just happens to be a genuine cowboy, trained by his dad and others. He works with a very good trainer who has helped him with a couple of horses who’ve turned out really well. After this last accident, the family agreed to get Drew over there sooner rather than later. The time for waffling over it had ended.
Drew meets his new trainer. And his dog.
I’m convinced that Drew will adapt well to the new style of training he’ll get, and that the education I already got him will speed things up. Being worked with more often will keep his mind busy and build back his muscles. No matter how much I’d hoped for it, my work and travel schedule would never keep him where he needs to be.
You bet, he will have more muscles.
So yep, my family and my other horses will be safer. I can work with Apache more easily without Drew raising a ruckus. The water troughs won’t have him chomping on the spigots (though it’s good there’s now a cage around the automatic waterers, since Spice is a big splasher, too). Drew will be in a more suitable situation with the cowboys, ropes, and all that. My hope is he will be happier.
Do I get to ride in this heirloom trailer?
But I’m very sad. I promised him I’d keep him safe, and now after just four years I’ve let him be shipped off. That’s normal, though. Even with his flaws, he was a lot of fun, and his curiosity always made me laugh. Sara said it was bittersweet when I told her. That’s it. Bittersweet.
Loading like a champ.
At least he’s still in the family, and I’ve been promised photos and videos. I’m truly grateful that Drew has found such a good new situation with good people.
Argh. This is hard.
Stopping now before I go into blaming myself. It is all for the best, just sad.
Good news: the rods in the horse pens are all back up and properly welded. More safety! More gratitude for the help on this.
I say that because I wore my Lynda Barry shirt today, with Marlys saying “dang.”
It’s a comic for people my age and was very funny in the 20th century. Look up Lynda Barry.
But I’m here to tell you I’ve taken my own advice to enjoy every dang moment, and this had a very pleasant day with only a little remnant of The Sickness with No Name. I even got to talk to some friends today about its baffling nature. I’ve missed friends.
I’ve missed these, too. Meadow pinks. I’ll work on a better photo.
And Kathleen felt better enough to do stuff with horses and enjoy family chatting (the men call it BS-ing). We spent a lot of time dreaming up one of those gardens that catch runoff, because we will soon have giant rainwater harvesting barrels that need managing. It’s fun to dream of home improvements. I’ve always loved it.
I don’t know why, but the little depression near the driveway with frogs, crawfish and harmless water snakes doesn’t count as a decorative water feature.
The most fun part of the day was when I took a well-deserved walk at lunch. Though it was a cloudy day, the wildflowers on our roadside made it seem very bright!
Nature’s color palette is vibrant in May.
Because we started getting rain right after the poor bluebonnets and paintbrushes tried to bloom, the second wave of flowers is impressive.
We tried. Made lots of seeds, though!
I had a grand time looking at how huge the Engelmann daisies and Gaillardia are this year.
Many springs find those daisies all droopy and sad. Not this year.
Closer to my son’s house, I found the clasping coneflowers (Mexican hats, as they were called until recently) were much more robust than they’ve been in recent years. They make the roadside look like someone planned the arrangement of plants.
Ratibida columnifera and Gaillardia
With a background of Dickcissels and orioles singing, I couldn’t help but feel thankful. This is why I live out here in rural America. The land and wildlife are always changing and endlessly interesting.
Grateful to be caretaker for this wild patch.
I am convinced I do better work when I can take these breaks. After lunch I churned out a big document and it met with approval. Then my boss took a framework I built and turned it into a project plan of great sophistication and utility. That was energizing to see! Living in the moment even makes work more rewarding, at least sometimes.
Yep, I’m proud of myself for plowing through the rough times. They make good days like today all the more treasured. And now, here’s the photo dump of today’s views.
A perfect flower? No, they’re all slightly irregular. Bindweed. Still pretty. Lemon beebalm peeking outCheckered white, with bonus grasshopper Just hats. Hilarious plant name: stinking chamomile Engelmann daisiesTexas stars in the mixFlowers in the pastureHorses have so much grass they leave the flowers aloneOrange sulphurSilverleaf nightshadeFrogfruitNo red in these! Venus’ looking glass, all lined up
Though it’s been two whole days since anything weird happened at the ranch, I’m on high alert. Any sudden movement gets me on defense. That has included swooping Barn Swallows, a deer in a field, and an owl on a fence post suddenly turning its head.
Scary swooping!
Most of this is normal, though the owl was pretty cool.
This Black Caterpillar Hunter didn’t set me off. I thought it was interesting.
I’ve been throwing myself into work, which is useful. And coaching coworkers does keep my mind off potential threats. But the minute I’m outside I’m watching for anything amiss. I’ll get over it after a few days.
Worst, we were watching our nightly television hour, when we heard loud screams. It wasn’t our TV, or the one in the bedroom. We ran outside to see if someone was hurt, then it became clear that our coyote neighbors were closer than usual. One coyote can sound a lot like someone screaming. It got my blood pumping!
We are chatty animals
I will do some breathing exercises after I finish this.
Looking at clouds helped earlier.
Today’s best news is I felt well enough to go eat some Mexican food with Lee. I sure enjoyed my tacos al pastor.
The Hermits' Rest 