Health – The Hermits' Rest

Doing hard things can lead to rewards

I rewarded myself for all that closet cleaning I’ve been doing by saying yes to an invitation to meet our friends Mike and Martha at the bakery in town. Lee even agreed to come along, though he was displeased that screeching children were hurting his ears. Nonetheless we all had nice conversations.

The bakery is so cute and GOOD. Visit Shirley Mae’s Bakery if you’re ever in Cameron, Texas.

Since I am the lesser hermit, I enjoyed talking to Martha, my friend Mary who was there with her family, and my son and his partner, who also came in. Then I had to have a good chat with the bakery owner’s dad and their nice employee, who collects Native American jewelry and is a Master Gardener, so she knows some of my friends.

This, dear readers, is why small-town living can be pleasant. I enjoy it much more now that I’m not paranoid about gossip and mean-spirited people. I’m glad I’m better at not caring about people who aren’t nice.

After all that socialization I was fine with watching some TV (finished Hawk and got through much of Ride or Die today) in the quiet house.

Of course, I spent two more hours putting clothing into boxes and moving things around. I almost finished sorting everything hanging up, and I disposed of two garbage bags of plastic hangers from my old house.

This was a mess. It’s my work outfits, dresses, and what passes for dress-up attire.

I still have a big pile of stuff to hang, now that there’s room for it, and plenty of hangers! That shows you how big the purge was. Tomorrow the hanging stuff will be hung, and if I have time, shoes will be culled* and arranged.

The horror! Goal is to have the surface of this island visible tomorrow.

My teeth still hurt but it’s better every day. I think the dry socket is healing. I think I’ll join my sleeping beauties and indulge in my favorite activity, sleep.

Carlton and Benito are doing much better these days. B is healing.

(*Sue, that’s the word my typo was trying to be yesterday)

No wonder it hurt

Hello everyone, especially those I did not see in my brief visit to Cedar Park yesterday and this morning. I’m relieved to report that the outcome of my dental adventure this morning was good. I feel very much better.

And the crowd goes wild! Hurrah! photo from Pexels

When I dragged myself in to the dentist office, they knew what was up immediately. I should have probably gone in last Friday. I had dry socket, which more often happens in wisdom tooth extractions, but occurs in 1-2% of all extractions. The blood clot that usually forms at the bottom of the site gets dislodged and that exposed raw nerves and bone. Yeah, that could explain some extreme pain.

So they put a lot of anise-smelling stuff in there and packed it back in. I’m pretty sure I caused the issue by trying to swish water around to keep the site clean. That didn’t help at all, and instead made it worse. Live and learn.

Rules after extractions are to not smoke, not use a straw, and not swish water around. Well. I didn’t smoke.

I wasn’t sure if I was going to make it to the root canal part of the appointment, because I uncharacteristically tensed up when the dentist was putting the anesthetic in. It hit a nerve or something and really hurt. When he finished, I started shaking, turned pale, and began to have some impressive back spasms, over and over. Yow, that hurt. And it scared us all (me, the dentist, and the technician). It finally passed and I was okay for the procedure. Root canal is a piece of cake compared to a messy extraction.

During all the drilling and poking, I imagined I was back in South Carolina, looking forward woodpeckers.

Everyone was so kind to me, and we had good conversations when I settled down. Lots about dogs. And the receptionist was really impressed by my temperature blankets (it came up because I said I was excited it hit 100° yesterday so I could use hot pink yarn.

After Lee got me home (so nice not to have to drive), I fell asleep for a long time. I was so tired from hurting. Tonight I have just a little pain, but I’m optimistic it will be better tomorrow.

I look forward to two months of no dentist! Nice guy, but this week was hard.

Pampering is good for us

Lee is a good guy under his grumpy facade. When he realized I was going to drive in early tomorrow morning for a root canal on my still-painful teeth, he volunteered to drive me to Cedar Park this evening and get a hotel room near my dentist so I can sleep a bit more, and I’ll have him to drive me home. I feel so pampered

Oh look, it’s 183 and 620. That intersection was a four-way stop in the 1990s.

And then he offered to take me out to eat something both good and soft. Conveniently, one of my favorite quiet sushi/Chinese restaurants is within walking distance of the hotel. We could walk there, even in 103° heat and not suffer!

When I come to the old Lakeline Mall area, in the vortex where Austin, Cedar Park, and Round Rock meet, I am surprised at what nostalgia pops up. I am in a place I spent my child-rearing years, near many dear friends and places I once lived. I look out the window and know Catherine and Carolyn/Lyndy are not too far. Sniff. But I’m in no shape to visit!

The extent of the nostalgia I feel is limited to people, former homes, the interesting geological aspects of the limestone karst, and nice places to eat. I miss those. I don’t miss traffic and having so many people around. There are always trade offs!

My chirashi sushi dinner pampered me well, and a glass of plum wine drowns out the throbbing. I did make it through the day without painkillers, so maybe I won’t bruise up awfully tomorrow.

I’ve never looked less forward to a dental appointment. Just gotta go inward and get through it. I’ll never make fun of people who get wound up before dental work again.

Make it go away

If you could erase one trend from history, what would it be?

I’ll tell you what trend I’d like to eliminate: charismatic psychopaths taking over the leadership of powerful countries and embarking on unstoppable campaigns to satisfy their need for praise and power.

Can we make this trend go away? Not without a destructive struggle, I fear.

Okay, people who came here to read the prompt response can stop reading. I’ll go on to ranch news. First, the dogs are making progress. And, hey, I discovered in the archives that we got Penney seven years ago this week, and she was my most recent acquisition. So we aren’t grabbing dogs Willy-nilly. (Kathleen rescued Goldie.)

Benito has started to both play with and assert himself with Harvey. I just hope they establish their boundaries quickly. It’s hard to keep B calm for his heart worm treatment when everyone wants to play and play. But they do sleep a lot.

We have noticed much less mounting and marking from Benito, which is really good. I’m not fond of that stuff.

As for the rest of us, we are muddling along, with no one feeling all that great. My jaw swelling has gone down, but I still hurt. I’ll let the dentist know, and I’m taking the antibiotics on schedule.

Sharing some white-mouthed day flowers, which got sprayed today. They were pretty, but it was time to trim some overgrowth.

Big thing for me: I am finally going through all my clothing from work and ranch and will be making some lucky thrift store shopper very happy. I got two boxes full of clothes today. More to come! This is one of my “issues,” having too many clothes. Comes from not having many growing up. But I go overboard. Sigh. I guess I could have worse issues (and probably do).

PS: haven’t lost a fish in my water garden! Yay!

I’d rather be a dolphin than Benito

If you had to be an animal for a week, which one would you be and why?

I liked today’s question. I thought about many possibilities, brought on by the book I’m reading about consciousness. I wondered how it would feel to be a bird, a fish, or a snake (those were my other ideas). But I settled on a dolphin,

Why a week as a dolphin? I’d love to live on the water and perceive how that feels. Of course, dolphins know what air feels like, so it’s not like many fish, who don’t know there’s any other option. I’d love to learn how dolphins communicate, what matters to them in their world, and what kinds of emotions they have. It would be like experiencing another culture and language but much stronger.

I wouldn’t want to be a captive dolphin. They are probably depressed. Image from Pexels

This kind of experience would probably lead us humans to rethink a lot of our assumptions.

I could be one of these happy guys I saw from a boat.

Okay, but why wouldn’t I want to be Benny/Benito? He had a hard day today and hurts all over, I’m guessing, having been neutered and given many vaccinations. It’s for the best in the long run, of course.

Plus, Dr Amy and team found out he is heart worm positive. I guess his previous folks hadn’t given him heart worm preventative every month. So he is embarking on a long road to recovery that involves keeping him inactive. Yeah. Good luck. Maybe the medicine will keep him tired.

I’ll miss that testosterone once it’s out of my system.

Poor little guy. I’m glad he made it over here so he can get the care he needs.

Currently he’s sleeping under the covers next to me.

A cute thing about today was that when he got home, instead of Benito following Carlton and pestering him, the tables were turned. Carlton didn’t stray from Benito’s side, like he was caring for him. So sweet.

We are liking the nickname Benito for Benny. After all, he’s Hispanic sort of. He just has to get used to it. This way when we scold him Penney won’t think she did something wrong.

Book I treasured

Which book have you read more than any other?

Still on yesterday’s book theme, I guess. I thought about it a while, and there are two books I re-read so many times I lost count. One was Black Beauty, by Anna Sewell. She was a very good horses’ rights advocate, and she sure convinced me that horses should be treated kindly, even working horses.

I have a feeling I wrote about this before, and I did, a whole blog post two years ago. So go read that. Obviously the blog prompt writers repeat themselves!

The repetition did give me a chance to think of another book I read so much it fell apart. It was a book about Star Trek (TOS)* that listed every episode, its name, the cast, etc. Allow me to go find out its name. It’s not on the shelf next to my James Blish novelizations of each episode. Yes, I had all those beauties, mostly first editions.

The best I can come up with is The Making of Star Trek. That was by Roddenberry and someone else. But it was 1976, too late.

I don’t have book cover photos so here are the fish again. Three of four goldfish.

Or perhaps it was the World of Star Trek by David Gerrold. I had both, but this one came out in 1973 at the peak of my fascination. I do remember I annotated the book extensively and kept it by my TV chair (which is still with me, in my office). Yep, that book probably got read more than even Black Beauty.

Well, I hope someone found this interesting. My one Trekkie reader, I guess.

Oh. We have been given Benny the brown chiweenie or something related to that. His owner says he obviously seems happy here. Yeah. He’s not in a cage outside. I woke up this morning with him and Carlton sleeping sweetly beside me. Anyway, we can get him neutered and updated on shots now.

I just kept coming back until you got the hint.

And I had a very complicated day at the dentist. A simple crown replacement turned into an extraction, prep for another root canal, and something or other on a third tooth. This leads to the need for expensive repairs. Glad I have a savings account and pain meds.

Book Report: The Myth of Normal

I am so glad I found The Myth of Normal: Trauma, Illness and Healing in a Toxic Culture, by Gabor Maté and his son, Daniel (2022). I’m also glad I didn’t read it until now, because I needed to finish going through some enlightening experiences that would be useful as I slogged through 500 pages of fascinating information and insights.

I seem to have misplaced the dust jacket.

If you’re not a big fan of “the way things are” in medical care, mental health care, and the idea of the self, you’ll find a lot of information confirming your intuition and backing up your gut feelings. Maté does a great job of explaining the mind/body connection in more concrete terms than I usually read in Buddhist or pagan literature. Maybe it’s because I come from the dominant US culture, I can follow his more rational arguments better than completely spiritual commentary.

All I can say is that the points made about how psychic trauma affects our physical bodies and shapes our personalities all rang true to me. I got a lot of clarity about my own “stuff” as well as why others act the way they do.

The encouraging thesis in this book is that once you figure out what the source of your psychological pain is, you can address it, learn from it, and make future decisions without its input.

The result? I have tools at my disposal that I can use to continue my journey towards authenticity and autonomy. You do have to be willing to experience difficult memories or re-live unpleasant events from the past. That’s the hardest part. To me, it seems worthwhile. I want to be healthy!

If you’re open to new ideas that aren’t totally crackpot, just different, I’d recommend this book. And if you or someone you care about is dealing with any type of addiction, this or Gabor Maté’s earlier books are great, non-judgmental resources. His views of addiction are insightful and helped me understand why some of us are more prone to it than others. It helped me make sense of my own family.

Thanks for the kind words about Benny the dog. I’ll leave you with a beautiful female Painted Bunting who let me watch her work on her nest at twilight.

Crepuscular Critters

It was one of those days when you wonder how you managed to stuff so many things into your waking hours. I had meetings all day, broken up by lunch and a visit from Dr Amy, our mobile vet.

The vet visit went fast, because on my way back from lunch I picked up “sleepy medicine” for the dogs. By the time the veterinary entourage arrived, all dogs were much more mellow than usual. Still, two of them required muzzling.

Note my trimmed toenails. Dr Amy says I’m not ready to go yet, too! Just showing my age.

But, boom, they all got vaccinated and had toenail trims. Alfred also got some matted fur removed, too. The horses were penned and ready, so that part also went quickly. Only Mabel needed a little sleepy stuff, because she didn’t want that strangles vaccine up her nose.

After working late and eating dinner Lee cooked on his new griddle, I went out to put a card in the mail and to put my GIANT new jar of Pergolide in the tack room fridge. Apache won’t run out of meds any time soon, and that’s a big worry off my mind since I’d lost my source.

Cooking with gas. We’ve had this thing for months, so I’m glad he used it.

I decided to walk along the fence to get to the mailbox since it was a lovely time, just past sunset. As I walked parallel to the front pond hill, I realized I had a companion animal, a beautiful skunk.

I walked along with the skunk until I got to the driveway, where I paused to let my crepuscular companion cross in front of me to the horse paths.

Note that another creature of twilight watched the whole skunk and Suna show. I was very glad Tipper just sat there and watched, because I didn’t need to see cat-on-skunk action.

Since I’d already spotted a rabbit and a deer, the only creatures I was missing was an armadillo and possum. Not bad. There were also night birds. The Nighthawks were flying low and loud, which always adds to the air of evening mystery. Of course, there was also a Barred Owl. I enjoyed seeing this Great Blue Heron flying by the moon and squawking away.

I do enjoy the evening birds. I’m always surprised how many are still calling as it gets darker and darker. Here’s some of what I heard during my skunk walk.

Can we have ONE crisis-less week, or even day?

That cloud of misfortune over our family is getting too big for its britches. We aren’t looking for constant tranquility, just a bit less ebb and more flow. The inconveniences, illnesses, deaths, and accidents are just piling on.

I picked myself flowers to bring a little nature inside.

Yesterday Lee drove all the way back to where the RV is, because he’d left his wallet. Yep. Made it nearly a week of lots of driving with no wallet. And in this place, you need ID, even if you’re white and straight and look male.

That’s nothing, really. And hey, I’m only slightly sick now. It was an okay day of work and I was looking forward to my 1:1 with my boss when Kathleen called. She never calls when we are both here. Well, she was feeding horses when Drew pinned her against the gate and kicked her right above her hip. Dammit.

Let’s look at pretty plants, not at someone who is hurt.

So I called 911 and got Drew away from her (he had been nuzzling her like horses do when they throw you to the ground—why are you down there?). It didn’t take too long for the guys to arrive. I am not an EMT so I can’t judge, but they didn’t seem very good at getting her on the gurney.

Off she went. I went back to work until I remembered to feed my son’s pets while he’s in the Old Country. At the same time as I realized I didn’t have car keys, FedEx came. Dogs barked as usual. Kept barking as I set boxes down. Were still barking when I got in the car…so I checked on them. Yes, as if animals hadn’t caused enough injuries today, Penney was trying to eat Harvey. He was trying, in his old and unstable way, to fight back. Carlton was trying to break it up. Too much hysteria led to a mess.

By the time I threw my bag at Penney to make her leave, blood was everywhere. No one was mortally wounded, but Harvey gushed a bit. That didn’t last long. Lee had to do a lot of cleaning of wounds and floors while I fed Potato and Dewey, the grandcat and rat. I admit I stayed with them and basked in their calmness and cuteness for a while.

I told myself that things come in threes (not really a believer), so I was happy to discover the third thing was just weird. Right by my car as I was driving to the road, a very large mama cow decided to mount an equally large and thankfully calm bull. That’s some power dynamics.

I wound down at the birding hut, where Nature at last decided to smile on me. I enjoyed watching two sweet-faced heifers checking me out across the fence. They were so graceful and curious. I bet they’ll make wonderful and respectful mama cows.

The good news is that Kathleen is “only” severely bruised and has no broken bones or damaged organs. Since this is the third time Droodles and his boundary issues have caused an injury, he is going to go to another location. There will be a trainer there who will give him the work he needs to be his best and will keep him away from short women or inexperienced people.

Safety first. Four years down the drain. I’m not the right person for him, nor is Kathleen. We are not up to what is needed.

This has not been a fun day. But we handled everything and have made rational decisions. I’m proud of all of the family. I’m not proud of one horse and one particular dog.

I must be a little better

How do I know? I just started singing some old Billy Joel song and it sounded like an alto singer doing the song, not Frankenstein’s monster. Yesterday I surely would have sounded monster-like.

Many exciting events happened today.

I almost opened my mouth all the way
I ate a juicy pear
My ears and salivary glands hurt more than my throat
I thought of writing a catchy pop song to the rhythm of the popping in my ears. Something’s moving around in there.
I was able to laugh a lot with my coworker and family—light-heartedly kidding around is healing

But that’s about all I have for you today. I am patiently healing and not rushing it, as I’ve been encouraged to do.

I’ll emerge a beautiful Suna-esque butterfly as I escape the mystery ailment cocoon.

Maybe I’ll review some television next. Being sick has led to a lot of that, since I can only read so long before my head hurts. (Whine, whine, whine—so many friends have much bigger challenges —I do remember you all.)