daily life – The Hermits' Rest

Forgiven but still in my head

What’s something you’ve forgiven but haven’t forgotten?

I’ve been doing a lot of forgiving in the past few years. Some things I’ve put aside so I don’t think of them. I do still remember things long past that haunt me. I’m still terrified by a couple of memories of my dad getting angry at me, one in particular.

Off topic, but doesn’t this cash register look like a dog?

Some teen neighbors were visiting and I was on the back patio with them, listening to them kid around. I was young, 7 or 8 maybe, so to me they were junior grownups who I should obey. Well, one of them wondered if cats could swim, right as my tabby innocently walked by. The other said he didn’t know, and told me to throw Purr-Cat into the fish pond. I did what I was told. I still remember that poor cat’s head sticking out of the water.

About that time, Dad and the teens’ dad came out of the carport, spotting the cat as it climbed out of the pond, trailing water hyacinths (yes, I know, invasive). Dad asked how the cat got in there and the boys said I did it. Well, Dad came after me all red in the face and breathing so hard his pipe glowed red (this is burned into my synapses!). I took off running, because I knew I’d get spanked for being cruel to Purr-cat.

Thank goodness the boys saw what was happening and told their dad it was their idea and they told me to do it. So they yelled at Dad, who, as the most athletic man I knew, had easily caught tubby little me and begun his 60s parental duty of swatting away.

The boys were made to apologize to me. I remember that, too. Now, I’ve forgiven my dad for spanking us kids. Everyone’s parents did that back then. I’ve also forgiven a few things he said in anger that he later apologized for. But I remember them.

I think when the people you love most hurt you, it really stays with you.

I don’t know what’s going on with all my tales of the past lately. Here in the present day, things were okay. The first juncos and Harris’s Sparrows of the year arrived. I also enjoyed watching three kinds of shorebirds in our pond’s “beach” area (what’s usually underwater). The Greater Yellowlegs, Least Sandpiper, and a larger sandpiper were all busily snapping up treats in the mud.

And I’m proud. I ordered a Christmas present. In November!

It’s for the Hermit, who coordinated with his sidekick today. He’s in his domain.

It’s like I live in a zoo

One thing’s for certain, this part of the world (central Texas) is chock full of critters. It’s Ellie Mae Clampett’s dream ranch. Okay, hers would have more critters. Still, today was quite the zoo exhibition around here.

It started out simply, when I fed the fish and headed to turn the water off. There at the spigot was a mantid (probably Carolina mantis), just looking at me like I was interfering with its insect hunting. So I bade that specimen farewell.

I went back in for a set of meetings, the second of which had me quite frustrated. So I went outside to breathe for a few minutes. I was so grateful that the blue mist plant had attracted more butterflies than usual. There were three Queens and a Gulf Fritillary flitting around and completely ignoring me. They’d go right by me so close I could feel the breeze from their wings. Five minutes of that and I was ready to debrief.

Watch them fly!

My next outing/work break was extra fun. I fed the songbirds and noted a White-crowned Sparrow on the tree stump. Yay, those are what I put the food out for. As I was writing down the birds before leaving for lunch, I heard something. It was not a hawk. It was not an Osprey. It was a Bald Eagle! Merlin Bird ID had registered one a couple of days last week, but I hadn’t heard it with my own ears. This time I heard it! I hoped I’d see it when I was driving but I didn’t. I know they are found in this county, but we aren’t near the big lake near Rockdale where they nest.

The afternoon featured only domestic animals, but as I was turning the water to the horse tanks and turkeys I noticed it looked like we’d paid a landscaping company to aerate the lawn. An armadillo or armadillos had been on a grubbing spree. They even dug some pretty big holes. Well, that wouldn’t have happened on Goldie’s watch!

In the late afternoon, Lee and I sat out by the pool to enjoy the pleasant weather and share ideas for the house in Ruidoso. Suddenly, Lee pointed out something in the pool. It was a Banded Water Snake!

For a few minutes we thought it might be dead, but soon enough it started swimming around. It’s a salt-water pool (not very salty) so we weren’t worried about its safety. It can also easily exit via the “beach” area. I’m sure it will be back in the pond soon. Just hope it doesn’t find the goldfish.

The animal parade wasn’t over yet! As the sun was setting, the familiar sound heard in November and March got louder and louder, the unmistakable call of the Sandhill Cranes. I’ve gone on and on about how much I enjoy them before, perhaps as recently as last week. But it was fun to have someone with me to watch them this time. They were flying much higher than last time, and there were many more, with multiple Vs. And yes, I took a lot of pictures. Enjoy or skip, it’s all good with me.

Any lingering annoyance I felt dissipated with the passing of the cranes. Plus, I got to text with my only remaining friend from college, with whom I shared MANY adventures and spoke poorly in Japanese but got much more fluent after some drinks. Some people you just always feel connected to. She’s one of them!

News Break

It was a much calmer day here at the Hermits’ Rest. The dogs were all recovering from their hard day yesterday, and they already seem less itchy. Alfred barely moved all day, but did come out and visit with us in the driveway this evening. Boy did he pee a lot!

I was looking at the back of the house and noticed that the water tanks blend in well.

Lee was visiting banks and official places today, because he had to send a bunch of money to New Mexico. Why? It’s because we ended up getting a contract on the Hippie House in Alto that we liked so much during our last visit!

We did a lot of negotiating, with Lee starting off by offending the sellers with his extra lowball offer. But, we didn’t pay all that money for real estate investment training for nothing. After they turned down our second offer of the most Lee was willing to pay, we walked away and thought about some of the other houses. The house on the National Forest was tempting, but just seemed too big.

In the end we just paused a couple of weeks. Lee’s theory was that no one else is remotely interested in the house, what with it being rather odd (remember the main bath toilet faces a window looking out at the road).

Sure enough, late last week our agent, Alison, called to say the sellers would entertain an offer of what we’d offered last time. The waiting game worked! We made a new offer and they accepted.

Now we are doing all the things you do before closing, which was accidentally scheduled for Thanksgiving in the contract, but I’m guessing will be changed. The septic system has been inspected and we have a good enough survey. Lee is waiving a home inspection, since he pretty much already did it. I’m suspicious of 50-year-old wiring and plumbing, but we will see.

Kitchen, featuring fridge painted gold. It will say goodbye. Behind is laundry room/pantry.

Of course, real estate being what it is, things could still go wrong, so I’m not letting myself get too excited just yet. I’ve had closings go bad before, after all. I do have a good feeling about the house. It’s not at all fancy, but it’s cozy and quirky. And there are lots of trees. Maybe we can even buy the lots next door on either side!

I’m looking forward to cooler summers. So I’m crossing my fingers this works out. if not, at least I’ll have stories to tell.

Benito assumes he gets to spend summers there, too. He had a bath tonight, because he rolled in turkey poop.

Oh. More photos of this house are at the end of my earlier blog about house hunting in Ruidoso.

Oh look. Another shiny object I made to keep calm.

Stay strong, fellow humans

Tomorrow is a day I’ve anticipated with a mixture of hope and trepidation, the US mid-term elections. More than anything, I’m trying to quell my fears and send out waves of peace. I love this meme I found in some Buddhist corner of the Internet.

I hope today you will join me, and the world will live as one.

Those of us in Texas have done all we can. My friends in other states have made their own choices. Those of you elsewhere, please hold us in the light over the next few days. This country is by no means perfect, but we have stuck with our system of government for 250 years. Let’s go for 251 (better, 252).

Dark clouds fit the season and the mood.

Sending good thoughts to all of you, even the ones who think I’m delusional. Trying to discern truth from fiction today is very hard. My guess is that hardly any of us have a real clue.

PS: if I wake up sick, it’s nothing nefarious. It’s just all the high-powered flea stuff all the dogs were given. Hope it works.

It may rain tomorrow! Maybe it will stop flooding Arizona and come to us. There are cracks in the dirt.

What DO I think about?

What are your thoughts about cryptocurrency?

As a matter of fact, I don’t think about cryptocurrency at all. I forget it exists for long stretches of time. I don’t bother it and hope it won’t bother me. This may be the longest span of time that I’ve ever dedicated to thinking about cryptocurrency.

I dislike regular currency, too, but I must interact with it.

Things I do like are free. Today was the last day of the Pollinator Bioblitz but all I did was enjoy butterflies. I’m sure glad I have the blue mist flower plant my Master Naturalist friend gave me, because it provides a free butterfly show every day.

Birds also take up a lot of my thinking time. I’m not ashamed about it. Observing how other forms of life behave is not a waste of time. It reminds me that I’m part of a bigger picture.

Our resident Great Blue Heron reminds me that there are advantages to drought: it’s a lot easier to fish for delicacies in a shallow pond.

Today I spent a long time watching dozens of Eastern Bluebirds sitting on our electric wire and taking turns dashing down for a bug, chewing a bit, then flying back up. There was plenty for all, so no need to fight. I’m thrilled to see so many of these beautiful birds with the haunting calls.

I thought they were starlings at first, since there were so many

I even dug in dirt today, mixing new compost into the raised bed and planting cheerful winter pansies and some leaf lettuce in where my pepper plants were. The peppers are perking back up after their wind damage, so I put them in leftover hanging baskets with some compost into case they want to produce more. Why not?

Yep, I’d rather be thinking about nice, green lettuce than cryptocurrency.

Photos? I always have photos

Share a few recent shots from your camera roll, no context needed.

Sure, I’ll do that. But first a quick update on the big rainwater collection project. Much of today was spent grading the area around the house to keep the drainage good. In addition, my son put together a very nice exit for the drain pipe, which will protect the PVC and look like a design feature. It’s now graded perfectly to flow well, and theoretically to not erode thanks to hidden barriers of a shower pan liner and a hunk of cement that formed at the end of our big pour. Very clever.

I’ll save other news for tomorrow and instead follow instructions and just share photos. It’s so hard not to describe them!

Feeling sentimental about childhood heroes

What’s one thing you own that holds deep sentimental value?

I think the appropriate answer to this question, today of all day, is to share my attachment to my favorite action figure, Jean-Luc Picard. Today he’s sitting on a hastily constructed altar to honor Sir Patrick Stewart, the actor who played him.

The pansy is attacking his head, and I can’t find a lighter, but I’m trying to honor someone I admire.

I’ve had this Jean-Luc for many years. He’s kind of been like my elf on the shelf in that he’s always getting into shenanigans. He’s climbed many Christmas trees, hidden in Thanksgiving centerpieces, and most famously, served as the “God” on our monthly tarot group altars way back when we lived in our first Texas house (a decade or more ago). The Goddess figures were usually more serious figurines or such, and he always brought a note of levity.

Sometimes he went to work with me and served to intimidate certain colleagues (in my mind, anyway). Until today, he was guarding a big hunk of crystal on the mantel, awaiting his next mission.

I’m sure he’s hiding somewhere in this photo.

Picard is my favorite Star Trek character, and I enjoyed all his appearances in the franchise, including the Picard mini-series. He and Supergirl are my only action figures. (Not true, I searched for action figures in my phone photos and was reminded of Elizabeth Warren.) I’ve never been much of a doll person, though.

More importantly, though, I’ve admired Patrick Stewart, the wonderful man who advocated for animal welfare, human rights, and the rights of humans to love whoever they want to. He always came across as an intelligent, humorous, and kind person. I’d hoped we’d have another decade to admire his work in additional roles, but dementia hits so many of us.

Thinking of Stewart, his family, and friends

Yikes. I just want George Takei, William Shatner, and Brent Spiner to hold on for a while. This is a hard enough time.

Learning to let go of those you love or admire is one of the hardest parts of aging. That and letting go of hopes and dreams.

Speaking of hopes, we’d hoped to get the rainwater collection system set up enough today to get some water in, and the guys did it! I was there, as sprinkles were falling and the valve opened. Water went right in! Now, we got .05” of rain, so it probably has just enough to cover the bottom of the tank. But it’s a start! It helped me feel less sad.

Getting back to normal

It’s the middle of the last week of October, which is usually a great time of year to be here at the Hermits’ Rest. And yep, it was a beautiful day!

Look! Blurry butterfly! Gulf Fritillary.

It was also a fun and challenging day at work, the kind where you solve problems and take on interesting challenges. I’ll need more of these, because I agreed to stay on into next year.

I’ll still be able to sit by the pool on nice days, though. It looks especially good because our new worker weeded and trimmed the beds. He may have a future as a yard worker.

It could rain tomorrow, but that’s okay, because we can deal with any runoff! Rain will land in the concrete pad for the water tank and promptly drain through the pipes and out into a gentle swale. It’s ready to go!

Plus, the tank is in place! Hooray! Its hugeness now looms across the side yard and acts as a bit of a privacy screen. The land is almost all smooth and graded, so this phase of the rainwater collection project is about done. Next: collecting rainwater, which involves more tubing, valves, and stuff.

It’s farther out than I thought it would be.

I appreciate the peace and harmony this week has brought. It’s like a calm before a storm. I get to feed fish, talk to the turkeys, de-bur at least one horse a day, and walk around in search of pollinators. I can even feed and water the wild birds (replaced the broken birdbath). And no one’s stopping me. I’ll remember this feeling.

Who do I want to be?

If you could switch lives with a famous person for a week, who would it be and why?

You know, being famous doesn’t appeal to me very much. I’d like to be appreciated by those who matter to me, but being famous and surrounded by “fans” is not appealing. Maybe I could switch with someone who’s famous for being an anonymous benefactor would be okay. I’d enjoy benefacting.

I always feel magnanimous feeding the fish.

Nah, I’m all accustomed to being me. I’m used to my quirks, my personality, my pleasantly average looks, and the friends and family who can put up with me (and vice versa). Since there’s always something new to learn right here being me, I’ll just stick with it through all the ups and downs.

My nails are ready for the Master Naturalist annual meeting!

Here in the adequately interesting world of Suna, I found a few more butterflies for the Bioblitz, but I’m ready to blitz hard tomorrow in Waco.

The team at KCC Construction was at full strength today, which means the form for the big slab to hold the huge water tank now has buttresses to hold the weight of the concrete, an area all smoothed for the pad to hold pumps and filters, and the drains set up. Plus much rebar has been bent for more strength. That pad’s gonna be solid!

I tried to do two errands at lunch, but once again managed to hit the pharmacy during their lunch break. Sigh. However, Lee and I did manage to vote. It felt good to vote for people I actually know and like. I did have a bit of a panic attack when I was finished. I guess my internal angst about the outcome slipped out. I chatted with a friend and feel better now. I’ll deal with what happens later when it’s later.

Thanks for all the nice thoughts on what I share. I feel like I’m talking to very quiet people. Thanks, too, for your messages, texts, and calls.

Blown away!

It’s not hot anymore! The weather today would have been quite pleasant, except that the cold front literally blew in. Like a leaf blower on steroids.

Merlin only heard 8 bird species. Luckily my eyes saw three more, but 11 is a real low!

The mountain was gradually moved back to where the backhoe is, so the area could be smoothed down.

And the guys working on the forms for the cement pads had to be careful so pieces of wood wouldn’t blow them around. All the dirt moving also left a film of dust everywhere.

Worst: the cattle ranchers had spread fertilizer yesterday. Everything smells like poop. I was looking all over the house to see which dog had pooped, sprayed Lysol all over the house, and was totally baffled until I finally remembered that tractor pulling something behind it yesterday. Dogs are forgiven, but some horse is in Trouble for messing up yet another water trough float. (Spice)

I did manage to get out and snap some pollinator photos for the bioblitz, though the plants were very wiggly. I was surprised at how many butterflies and dragonflies stayed still long enough, and the workers found me a cool rabid wolf spider with eggs (not a pollinator, but interesting).