daily life – Page 19 – The Hermits' Rest

Farewell to Our Dear Friend

You may have heard that Goldie left this world today, about five months after her osteosarcoma ordeal began. The good news is that she didn’t really slow down until this week, and only got really bad today, not eating, having trouble standing, etc.

The three of us here at the ranch worked together to give Goldie a good last day. after many calls, the guys found a vet who would come here so she didn’t have to be hauled in and out of cars. I sat with her for the last hour before the vet arrived, with her head on my lap or in my arms. It was very peaceful and loving.

It was important to me that she have peace. I have had too many traumatic dog passings. I don’t want more if it can be helped. We knew this was coming, so we could prepare.

Describing what a special dog Goldie was is difficult. People say all Great Danes are sweet dogs. That may be so, but this one felt like a friend, a confidant, and a guardian all rolled into one.

She was a Mighty Huntress of skunks and armadillos, she was a goofy dinosaur head when she got excited, her tail was a danger to men of a certain height, and she looked at you with those golden eyes, so full of love…

The few years we had with Goldie weren’t enough. But that’s what she had for us. We will treasure our memories.

Goldie’s memorial bonfire, next to her very deep grave. Digging big holes is a good way to process grief.

February 11 Status

Update on today:

It rained all day. I hope it was enough.
I finished the 2024 temperature blanket. The borders helped.
I feel irrelevant in today’s world. Not much to contribute. Fading away.
Goldie had seizures. Lee wants to see if she can make another week.
Lots of sickness among my friends, as well as losses of beloved dogs and cats. They mean so much to us.

There are hundreds of Grackles in these trees.

It’s just one of those times. I’ll keep breathing and accepting that life has its ups and downs.

Blanket with borders. January 2024 at left, December at right.

Time for Quiet

It’s one of those days when there is a lot to process. I’m not sure that I’m ready to say anything yet, other than I’m feeling really irrelevant due to my age, ethnicity, gender, and views. It’s probably good that I figured that out before I did or said something I shouldn’t. I need to keep processing for a bit.

I’m the big egret in a world of coots and ducks.

We did make it home. The animals are quite pleased. The people seemed to be, too. I’ll talk to y’all, one-sidedly, tomorrow. I’ll be quiet now.

Our two sickly dogs mostly bark from the couch now. Neither is doing very well.

An Ideal Suna Day

Describe your most ideal day from beginning to end.

I wasn’t going to write again today, but the prompt cheered me up. I enjoyed pretending I could have an ideal day again. I could do this day if I had enough money to maintain this lavish lifestyle. It’s not really lavish, just maintaining what we have now, which I doubt will happen. Wait I was cheered up there for a minute. Hold on.

There is a new day, every day, until there isn’t

So, I would wake up around 7:30, meditate, and do morning journaling over coffee, preferably on the porch. Of course I’d feed my many happy chickens. Next I’d walk all over the property looking for interesting plants and birds. I’d get at least 50 birds on Merlin (which I did yesterday!).

I’d come in and check email and, it being my ideal day, I would not read my usual news. Lunch time would roll around and I would go to town and eat with one or more of my friends, maybe at somewhere not Mexican for a change. We would say kind things to each other and laugh at funny stories.

This looks remarkably like today’s tacos but is from Pexels

Heading home, I’d spend quality time with the horses, not just Apache. I’d groom and exercise one of the others, feed them all, then ride Apache and practice our skills. We would take a little walk around, just for fun and he’d be fine with that.

After the horses, I’d go swimming or hang around on the patio chatting with Lee and any other present family members, followed by a dinner that I didn’t cook. Maybe it would just be cheese and crackers if lunch was big enough. We would watch a movie or television show that was funny or educational. I would knit or crochet through that part.

Yes, I’d add some fruit. Probably not wine, since I’m drinking less.

I’d go upstairs, get ready for bed, then blog and/or read. Carlton would hop up and join me in snoozing.

Ah, that sounds good! My ideal day is peaceful and calm. It’s relatively stress free (only fun stress allowed).

I did many of the things in the ideal day today, but I also worked and stressed over world events. Sigh. I’m spending much time these days just watching, observing, and trying to understand what’s happening. I’m trying to listen more than I speak. And I’m trying to be useful.

Yes, my ideal day is at home. I probably also have an ideal travel day!

A Beautiful Day for a Long Nap

This was such a pretty day. It started out cool and barely got to 70°F. I had hoped to spend most of the day outdoors, and I got a good start in the morning by taking a long walk, then guarding two escaped calves until the owner could move them back inside. Only one truck was going fast enough to hurt them but I slowed it down. They’re valuable livestock!

Then I spent time with the chickens trying to figure out why bees are all over their food. I still don’t know, but Clint assures me they are delicious. Extra protein!

Bonus bee, rooster and turkey video. Hear the buzz and gobbles.

Back at the house, I tried to finish January on the temperature blanket but got sleepy, which is odd, because I slept great last night. I went upstairs and collapsed into a deep sleep that I had a hard time waking up from. It was a weird feeling. I thought I was sick or something but maybe I should have eaten more.

I made myself get up and go outside once I could move around. I took some photos with the telephoto lens but haven’t downloaded them yet. It wasn’t such a great bird day anyway.

I saw a formation of planes, three white, three black. They went north then came back.

I’d intended to ride Apache but was feeling lightheaded so I just exercised him. I’m sure he’s thrilled. Tomorrow he has no choice.

I did get January all done. It needs blocking, but does look like a calendar! I like the border. It’s perky.

Welcome Light

Tomorrow is Imbolc, a celebration that light is starting to appear from darkest winter (among other things). Nature brought the light a little early, and provided us with a rare cool, sunny day. It was mighty pleasant.

I enjoyed a break from my very busy week by sitting outside after work, reflecting on how much I value my connections and wish I could cultivate them more.

I’m too busy sitting with birds, I guess.

At least I talked to my friend Donna yesterday, and she reminded me that the Purple Martins start to return this time of year. I also saw the bluebonnets getting bigger today, and I was happy, even though the speaker at last night’s Master Naturalist class informed us they are not native here, just in the granite areas of the hill country. Poo.

Lee was practicing with his camera so you can see what I look like when listening to and watching birds.

I know spring is coming, with turkey eggs every other day, calendar changes, getting my first new temperature blanket module done (tomorrow), and a new theme color for my journal and nail polishes. Stereotypical, it’s true, but February is all pink. I might even have pink in my hair. Ooooh.

Don’t dye me pink, Suna. My nose is pink enough.

Raising a Complaint?

What do you complain about the most?

I try not to complain, but I do it. Someone who has to live with me might have a different answer, but my assertion is that I complain most about the dogs barking and running outside at the slightest noise when I’m trying to watch television. It is so loud. At least now that we stream, it’s possible to pause.

When not barking all night, Goldie is cute.

Okay, I asked Lee and he said I complain most about the new occupant of the White House. He claims he complains most about the same guy I complain about, and also the death of customer service. I like that answer.

What I can’t complain about is Connie Gobbler. She’s all grown up now, I guess, because she laid her first egg today! And it does look like it has the measles!

Of course I sent a picture to Heather, who gave her to me, and to her namesake, Connie. The egg is no bigger than Cindy-Cathy’s eggs, but future eggs should be bigger.

I’m not complaining about the weather, either. We got an inch of rain, and I can tell the ponds are more full. We still need more, though.

Now I Can See Those Dang Birds

One thing Lee and I did in Austin yesterday was get a zoom lens for our Cannon camera. It goes 150-500, and is pretty big but not ridiculous. We went to Precision Camera, a store I’ve patronized off and on since I moved here. I am glad they sell used equipment. New stuff is pricey.

The first time I went to Precision Camera it was a much smaller store near the current one. I went with Mary Jo, the school librarian at my kids’ school, to get a digital camera so I could put photos on the school website. We got the best we could get in 1998, since it was a new school and we had funds. This fine camera could take ten pictures on its memory card. Then you’d have to slowly download to a PC to clear out space. Getting even one photo per class was tedious (plus no photos of children’s faces—we had already figured that out).

I’m pretty sure this was it. You can get your own here.

I digress. The current equipment we now have holds lots more photos, and we download them via the camera’s wifi, which even our mid-level Canon camera has. So see, some things are better now. My goal is to get photos of birds that will look good enough to ID on iNaturalist. I have no illusions of becoming an art photographer at this point in my life.

New lens triumphantly produced an identifiable White-crowned Sparrow.

Today was not a great day to try the new lens out, since it was misty and drizzly all day. The temperature only varied by 6° all day!

Even though it was a gray day, I took many bird photos, some with the phone, which also has a good zoom but not as many pixels. I wanted to compare.

The lens is heavy, so I’ll have to build arm strength. It has stabilizers, which is quite useful for shaky arms.

Luckily, whatever this thing is didn’t move.

Mostly I practiced taking pictures of our Great Egret as it preened its damp feathers. It’s great to be able to see it up close.

On a sunny day I could do more, but I enjoyed trying different modes. I’m nowhere near able to manually manipulate settings. I’ll get there.

I look forward to seeing what I can do around the ranch. I get plenty of bird variety here! Maybe I can get better photos out camping, too. Identifiable ones will suffice. I’ll leave you with a few of my experiments.

We Spontained Today

Rather than doing the usual Saturday chores, Lee suggested we go to Austin and do something different. We call that spontaining. Being spontaneous, but more active.

So we drove to Austin (a thing we usually avoid), visited the wonderful camera store there and chatted with the friendly staff, bought Girl Scout cookies because I support them and could enjoy a few cookies, looked in the comic book store, which is really a gaming store, and enjoyed some memories of my past life.

With my weird attachments to places, I find returning to my old stomping grounds rather difficult. I get very sad, nostalgic, or something. But, I powered through it and checked out all the changes in greater north Austin. I still miss everything about the place except high property taxes and awful traffic.

We ended the day with a nice visit and dinner at my favorite small sushi restaurant (which is still fantastic and patronized my mainly Japanese people), with our friends and former business partners, Carol and Russell.

We had great conversation, supported each other, and enjoyed the food. I’m so glad we are making the effort to see people. Even they aren’t going out as much these days, and they used to be so social.

Consider hanging out with a friend or two. It’s a privilege to be free to do so. And do some spontaining!

Grown-Up Woman with a Sparkly Horse

In the last few years I’ve done quite a few things I have been hesitant to do. It always feels like I’m stepping off the edge of a cliff. But every time I don’t fall. I live. *

I moved to a ranch in Texas. I’ve started and closed businesses. I’ve stood up to horrible bullies. I got off a tall horse without falling. I trotted and relaxed. I hiked six miles on my own. I raised my voice and dealt with the consequences. I’ll raise my voice again if I have to.

I’ve nursed a broken animal back to health, too. I didn’t think I could.

Today I did another grown woman thing. I drove myself and Apache to Tarrin’s. By myself. I pulled a trailer safely and successfully both directions! I lucked out and hit zero stoplights on the way out, but handled them fine coming back.

It would have been GREAT except my lesson is tomorrow. It says so, right on my calendar. Geez. At least my horse looked good as he arrived on the wrong day.

There’s something weird in my tail. Maybe Camena will pull it off.

Tarrin was nice about it and let me ride Apache around while she did her lesson. It was a lot of fun and good practice. He’s so comfortable there! And sparkly.

I got these mane and tail clips a while ago. But hadn’t had time to figure them out until today. I got one glamour shot of him, but not in the sun. I probably should put in more clumps of green.

I feel like the steed on the cover of a romance novel!

I tried to get cute pictures of him after our ride but he really, really wanted to take a nap in the nice sun. I can’t blame him; the weather was perfect by afternoon.

Before anyone says anything, I know I shouldn’t let his reins lie on the ground. He wasn’t going anywhere.

It was quite frosty this morning but only down into the 20s here. The afternoon was in the 50s (F).

All the animals enjoyed the day, and I feel so much better being able to tow horses myself. Yep, I’m a grown-up woman with a sparkly but sleepy horse.

*I did think I’d died that one time I tried to canter on Droodles and was thrown off. But I lived.