family – Page 12 – The Hermits' Rest

Projects? Renovations? We Still Have Them

If you’ve known me a long time, you’ll remember when I blogged a lot about our home renovation business. While we have changed some things, we still buy houses and hire great folks to fix them up. Now some of those folks are our family, which makes it extra special.

The current team worked on some projects of their own recently, but Lee and I finally got to be the client in this one, a very nice single-story house in Cameron that used to be owned by people who made candy in what’s now the master bedroom. What a cool story!

The house is so wide I don’t have a picture of the whole thing.

When we got it, the layout was quite awkward, with a giant living/dining area, a huge pink kitchen, an even huger main bath, and a bedroom way at the end of the house that you had to go through another bedroom to access. Luckily, a lot of cleanup and prep had been done by the prior owner, so the team didn’t have to start from scratch.

After much brainstorming among me, Lee, and our contractor, we redid the layout. There are now three nice bedrooms in the former living area, the middle bedroom is expanded to be a nice living area, and the kitchen is still pink, but open to the living area. It’s much less choppy.

Kitchen is now open. Light is temporary.

They will add windows in the long, dark hallway to the master bedroom, and a utility room with laundry and new HVAC is being added in the former carport, which will now be a nice covered porch.

Of course, as with any remodel, structural issues were found, so now the ceiling joists are all new and sturdy, and insulation will be added throughout the house. It’s going to be so much nicer to live in. The electrical work is all new, too. Plus the scary roof has been replaced.

People don’t see the new wood around the windows or the stove vent that now actually goes outside, but we and the crew know it’s there, and future occupants will be safe, dry, and cozy. The house will keep its mid-century style, with a few exterior upgrades.

I hope to share more photos later! Stay tuned.

Daily Birds

Today I enjoyed wrens. Two of our usual residents, the Bewick’s and Carolina wrens, were giving a concert this morning. It sure was beautiful, loud, and lengthy. They have very different songs. The winter wren sometimes shows up, but it mostly makes scolding sounds, as does the house wren, who is very round. I sure enjoy their hopping, climbing, and tail wagging.

Yep, We Had Family Traditions

Write about a few of your favorite family traditions.

Ah, I’m sitting in a clean, quiet hotel room, with mindless television and knitting. It’s a perfect time to reminisce about family traditions.

My current family is a bit too chaotic to have a lot of traditions. It’s always something different every day. But my family of origin had a couple I enjoyed at the time and remember fondly.

I’m not home so I can’t scan photos. Here’s our foggy morning.

One I loved was when we lived in south Florida in a family-oriented neighborhood of little cement-block houses. We had a dachshund mix dog named Pumpkin during my college and grad school years. I thought of her as my sister, because she was great to talk to and hang out with. I’m not kidding, I often forgot she was a dog.

Ha! I found a photo of Pumpkin, Dad, and two neighbors.

Anyway, it was my parents’ tradition to take a walk with Pumpkin every evening after dinner. Whenever I was home, I went along with them and my brother. The walk only went to the end of the block, because Mom couldn’t go very far (she was sick a long time, and died when I was 26).

The front of the house, on my 16th birthday. Stylish for 1974.

However, the walks were always fun. We’d talk and joke and comment on the quality of Pumpkin’s poop, which always happened at the corner. (Dad had to go clean it up once a week or so, because they we’d never heard of poop bags in the 80s.) In the winter we’d check to see if she’d produced a “steamer.” Dad loved those.

The walks were often long in time, compared to their length. That’s because we often stopped to talk to the neighbors. My dad and brother were very social. I enjoyed listening to them. It felt so comfortable and convivial. They could talk about all topics, drink beer, tell stories, and get along. They were just nice, hard-working folks. I miss those times.

I realize that hanging out with my family and watching the dog poop is probably a weird tradition, but we all enjoyed it. It was something Mom could do with us, which was so nice. And my Dad and brother were so funny. I’ll treasure our quirky family togetherness time.

Before I left for my 6.5-hour drive to Arkansas, I did get in a little bird watching during the foggy morning. (I haven’t seen the sun since last Saturday.) I’m going to declare our resident loggerhead shrike the Daily Bird, because it matches the sky and trees. Plus, I love watching them grab bugs.

I’m sure the shrike is wishful for the grasshopper season to start! They go into overdrive then.

Who Am I?

Write about your first name: its meaning, significance, etymology, etc.

Well, I’m glad I don’t hide who I am on this blog, or this would be more of a challenge. No doubt I e answered this before over the years, but here I go, in case anyone is at all interested.

Sue Ann means “graceful lily,” according to name books’ etymological declarations. I am pretty damned sure my parents didn’t look at my round and wobbly baby self and name me based on that.

No, after a couple of days of indecision, they named me after two of Dad’s sisters. Of course, as the Kendalls tended to do, they gave me their middle names. I’m glad. Bettye Doris is a mouthful. Bettye went by “Pug” all her life and Doris Ann went by both names, or either, randomly.

Suna came from an existentialist Japanese movie (and book by Kōbō Abe) that affected me deeply. It was called Woman in the Dunes or Suna no Onna (砂の女). Suna means something like grains of sand, which I metaphorically interpret to be like all the different facets of oneself. The idea of being fluid yet solid, like sand, stuck with me, and so when the time came to choose my own name, that stuck. Like sand on the beach.

I used to be quite the little gloomy existentialist intellectual in the olden days.

By the way, Suna is a given name in other cultures. The source I saw says it’s a female Turkish name meaning “duck.” The cute kind, I’m sure. Ah, upon further reading, it means beautiful and tall, like a drake. I guess since male ducks are prettier?

I saw a lot of ducks today, along with white pelicans, along the Cooper Lake dam.

Or it could be gold, from a Sanskrit word. In any case, a hint of my love for the name comes from the fact that it’s much less beautiful backward. Ha!

I’ve driven that topic into the dirt (another sand reference?) so let’s move on. Today dawned cloudy and gusty. Hiking in that weather is not fun. I did try, and got a couple more plant photographs and bird sounds, but checking the forecast led us to head home sooner than planned.

Rain is forecasted for tomorrow, and Lee didn’t want to take Seneca the motorhome on back roads in bad rain. So we visited the park office, where buying a magnet was quite difficult, then headed out.

This pretty stand of yuccas was one photo I was glad to get. The only ones I saw.

It’s an interesting drive from Cooper to Cameron if you avoid the interstate. There are lots of horse farms (yay) and lots of this kind of thing (ugh).

Proudly declaring to the world he’s Suna backwards.

It was good to be home and get caught up with things back home. It can rain all it wants to now!

Speaking of Love – and Hawks

Can you share a positive example of where you’ve felt loved?

Woo hoo. Today’s prompt goes with my day’s experience. So, let’s blog.

I’ve figured out that one of my “love languages” is the one about giving time and effort. When someone spends time doing something to make my life better, I feel love.

One example is how incredibly grateful and loved I felt when I came home from a trip expecting improvements to my horse area, but was blown away to see that two portable buildings we had were now a beautiful and large hen house with the interior painted “my” colors and a HUGE new tack room that would hold all my horse supplies and have a sitting area. I was blown away.

Note that they painted the hay storage container to match the building.

Every time I go in either of those buildings I have warm feelings about the two guys in my family who worked so hard on it. They were my son’s first two carpentry projects, so there are imperfections, but they’re charming to me. And I think of the stories behind how they got all the furnishings and built the saddle racks and pegs for halters, etc.

The other time I felt loved like this was when Lee gave me my bird journal. I couldn’t believe he’d spent so much time collecting bird photos then made the book by hand. I get to feel loved every day when I write in it!

He also made this cute book cover for the journal.

Love Birds of the Day

The highlight of my day today was all about love. After making many trips back and forth to the horse trough with water, I decided to go listen to birds for a while. Today got down to 12°F but then warmed up to 45°. That felt balmy!

You probably can’t tell, but the pond iced over.

As I headed towards the woods with my empty water containers, I saw movement. It was the pair of red-tailed hawks I’ve been watching for a few weeks. They were doing an awesome love dance. I was transfixed as I watched them soar and glide, then dive down near the ground and up through the trees.

The only photo I got of them flying. I was too busy watching most of the time.

It was so graceful yet strong. I felt privileged to get to see this up close. It was the closest I’ve ever been to flying hawks. They flew right past me a couple of times. At last, they rested in the trees for a bit.

They are both in this picture. One flying low in front of the trees, one higher, behind trees.

Then, off they went, flashing their wings at me. That made up for the hard work. I loved those love birds.

I made it a loop

PS: thanks to everyone who tells me they read my blog. I feel like the lady on Romper Room (a television show from my youth), who would look in her magic mirror and say, “I see Susie and Donny…” or whoever’s parents had sent her a postcard.

I see you, Mike, Donita, Lory, Libba, Catherine, Barbara, Debi…and so many more!

Can We Live Long and Prosper?

What are your thoughts on the concept of living a very long life?

Today’s question has been on my mind lately since there have been a lot of deaths in my circle, and I’ve been a close observer of the stress, pain, and hard decisions loved ones have to go through.

One of our blog family lost her husband yesterday, which hits hard. But I’m glad she has the support of many close friends who’ve gone through this before, and she has supportive family. Sometimes, when no one you know has been through such a loss, you can feel so alone and lost, and it hits you so hard.

So, do we want to live very long lives? No matter when we pass away, we will leave sad people behind to treasure memories. I wish I had more of them with my mom, who died when I was 26. I coped poorly but was glad she was out of her mental and physical pain.

As long as I’m in reasonable health, can enjoy nature and my community, and am not a burden to others, I’d prefer to live a long life. I’m just curious about how we humans are going to handle things in the coming 30 or 40 years. And I’d love to continue contributing to society and becoming more wise.

Yet, if I were chronically ill with constant pain or costing my family so much that I was a financial burden, I’d have no problems with letting go. It would be interesting to see what’s next for the energy that brings me life.

I can honestly say that I empathize with anyone who decides they are “done” and don’t keep pushing forward in old age, and I can see not wanting to give up. And I have seen for myself how quickly you can go from fighting to dignified surrender when the time comes.

This made no sense, I’m afraid, but it helped me to write it. I do want to live long and prosper, though!

Love to all of you who are struggling. I am here for you if you need me.

Odd Bucket List Item

Today we’re in a condo in the Canyon Lake area, because we needed a break and have a horse sitter for a few days. Apache must have his diva needs met. Of course, I had deadlines and video calls to do, but we managed to get me out in nature.

I don’t have to work until January 2, so I’m ready to relax and catch up on things…after a couple of relaxing days. I think just maybe things might be settling down at home, which will help us all deal with whatever changes come next year. We can flow like a river.

Like the Guadalupe River, to be precise.

I started my day walking around the extremely large condo complex and trying to find nature. There was a woods next door with sleeping deer! Well, I woke them up. And I enjoyed checking out the nice mini golf course with a view of Canyon Lake. It was a good reward for finishing my release notes.

Later we went over by the nearby dam that created Canyon Lake to enjoy the views and see what lives there. I saw some American wigeons swimming around, plus some mussels. There were even a few new plants, but I didn’t find the rare Canyon Lake madrone Lee always talks about.

Later we went to lunch at a very nice Italian restaurant. The food and service were both superb. I had fish with Alfredo pasta and veggies, and Lee said the chicken he ate was the best he ever had. It was served with beautiful homemade ravioli. And it wasn’t even very expensive!

After more meetings for me, we went to the nature trail on the other side of the dam, along the Guadalupe River. The trail is maintained by the local Master Naturalist chapter, the hosts for our next meeting. I wonder if this trail will be a field trip? They’ve made a nice guide with numbered markers to tell folks what they’re seeing. I’m impressed!

I tried to listen for birds, but the darn rapids made it hard (the rapids are wonderful, of course). Eventually chatty people, crying babies, leaf blowers, and small planes stopped long enough for me to hear many woodpeckers, wrens (including canyon wren!), and a kingfisher. Of course the normal songbirds were there, including an extra friendly Ruby-crowned kinglet and a very dedicated ladder-backed woodpecker.

It was fun to spot springs, ducks, ferns,cypress, and pecans. I love me a riparian area! This river really is one of Texas’s gems.

So, what was the odd bucket list item I referred to in the title? Well, I’d seen most of the places where Lee has lived, except for one, which was a rustic camp area near Canyon Lake. He drove me through the area and I got to see the driveway he had worked on. It appears that whoever owns it now is building a real house there. Now my bucket list is complete!

Just a pretty old Ashe juniper with a red oak sprout.

Yes, What I Expected

Is your life today what you pictured a year ago?

A year ago? I figured the uncertainty and long parade of unexpected setbacks around me would continue. They did. I also figured I’d just stick to dealing with what I could control, and I was pretty successful at that. Honestly, with a pessimistic outlook like that, focusing on the moment and your own business is a good plan.

Twilight of the day, of the year, of this life. All good.

At this point last year I’d already concluded that nothing I do is going to change how people who once loved me treat me now, and that my best tactic is to love the people I love without any limits, just appropriate boundaries. That’s worked, too! Hmm, I’m reminded of the fictional dating service they had on Saturday Night Live called “Lowered Expectations.”

I decided around this time a couple of years ago to drop expectations of how others will act and to step back from trying to get closer to people I care about. I just go out and be me. That’s truly worked out well, because I’ve felt more welcome and appreciated in my community since then.

I’ll go my own way, with a peaceful heart

I think I’ll keep it up, and keep enjoying the beauty around me and snatching up fun times as they occur. There will be more bouncy houses, I hope!

Speaking of fun, I had a nice brunch this morning with Pouri, and we got to talk a bit. Then I enjoyed an stress-free drive home, even in Dallas. Plano sure looks clean and tidy compared to Cameron. Quite a contrast!

I’m glad to be back with my messy horses and barking dogs (one snoring).

Did I answer the question? I expected little change for me, personally, but lots around me. That is how it worked out.

Daily Bird

Today Merlin heard a kestrel! That made me happy, because I rarely see or hear them here on the Hermits’ Rest ranch, though I see one all the time down by my neighbor’s place. I guess individuals don’t have a large territory.

They sure are beautiful little birds. I’ve seen them catch food a couple of times and go back to their telephone or electric wires. I wonder what they say on before those were invented? (Trees)

Birds and Babes

Today I’m starting off with the birds, because even though I had limited bird time today, I got a lot of fun sights and sounds in.

I think the cardinals are posing. They’re everywhere, flapping and chirping.

The most dramatic sight was watching the red-tailed hawk get chased off her perch by a crow (I say “her” because the hawk is very large). I got some good photos and turned a couple of the live ones into little movies.

The start

More pestering

Hawk is annoyed

The other birds, meanwhile were just all a-flutter. The Harris’s sparrows were really busy, but there were 8 other kinds in the mix. I also enjoyed a couple of wrens and house finch groups that weren’t at all shy. It was fun! But I had to leave.

Babes?

I left home to go to Plano to see baby Ruby, who is actually a two-year-old chatterbox now. I also went to see Pouri and Elmira/Ellie, my Persian “sister” and bonus daughter. I miss them a lot, because they’ve always welcomed me and treated me so kindly. It feels so great to feel unconditional love!

I’m not that tall. My shoes have hidden heels I think.

I really enjoyed the party, because Ellie and Jimmy have such nice friends and families and wow, all the children there were so happy and fun to watch. They just played like crazy and the parents were so good at soothing and redirecting when needed. I was impressed.

This little girl cooked and cooked on this excellent play kitchen that makes cooking noises.

The best thing was the bouncy house in the back yard. Those little ones were filled with joy and energy and had a blast. All but one were girls and no one screeched!

Proof I bounced.

The little boy is Ellie’s nephew and as cute as he can be. Watching him play with the toy ice cream shop and car wash was so much fun for me. He’s a little engineer or scientist in the making.

Ruby and the ice cream shop toy. It’s very clever.

I’d have felt jealous or sad since I don’t get to hang out with grandkids much, but Pouri let me pretend to be a grandmother, so I just sat and smiled at the cuteness.

I did end up passing in a few of the things I’d have given to my grandkids to Ellie and Jimmy, with all my love. I gave a Peter Rabbit cup and saucer my dear stepmom had given Declan with intentions to pass them to his children. He said it’s fine to pass them on. I also gave Ellie my three beautiful story books of different cultures that had been my mother’s as a child. They are now almost 100 years old. I think Ruby will enjoy the beautiful illustrations and the Japanese haiku.

There was crying involved in that exchange but mostly it was very satisfying to see the thoughtful and engaging gifts that the little ones had so much fun with. There was lots of food and role playing stuff, all things any preschool child would enjoy.

I also enjoyed the cake. Dang, the kids all took turns nicely, really loved singing English and Persian birthday songs, and were patient with problematic candles. Everyone just laughed, including when Ruby steadily picked individual sprinkles off the cake. She likes sprinkles a lot. This was such a low-stress event.

I came back to the same hotel I usually stay at, walked around by a creek, and enjoyed some quiet knitting time. I enjoyed my day being an honorary grandma and seeing my friends.

I got a reindeer party favor because there were extras. I made her a collar. It says Vixen. That was my childhood reindeer toy’s name. Ellie sent carrots home with each toy (technically a caribou).

When I Became a Parent

Tell us about your first day at something — school, work, as a parent, etc.

Maybe writing about the dim past will ease me back into writing.

When I saw this prompt, memories pushed themselves up from forgotten synapses and I remembered giving birth and the first day I became a parent. What a strange and incomprehensible new world it was for me.

I’ll gloss over the birth part, which involved my spouse barfing all over the place and having to go to the ER, leaving me to labor alone (no family or close friends nearby), then included every possible birth intervention I thought I’d never have, leading up to an unplanned cesarean due to my “incompetent” cervix. I never felt so powerless and out of control.

Then, after the anesthesiologist nearly paralyzed me (and I TOLD him I had a slight scoliosis), I was presented with a small person who used to live inside me. I felt like I already knew him.

Being a new parent who’d just been drugged up, I mostly remember smells from the hospital, from me, and from the baby. I’d never been hospitalized before, and it was a smelly experience.

I fell asleep after the lengthy labor and being surgerized at 6 am, and they took the dang baby away from me. When I woke up, not only did I have to listen to some woman with no pain tolerance screeching about needing more IV meds, but there was no baby. How the heck was I supposed to get colostrum in him?

Well, I could tolerate pain. And I figured out how to drag my IV with me and went to find my damn baby. I’m sure that was a lovely sight. Too bad.

I found the nursery about the time some nurse ran up and said I shouldn’t have walked unaccompanied. But no one was paying me any attention at all thanks to Old Screechy and I wanted my child.

That got me the child, who I would not put down henceforth except to hand him to my spouse. He was in charge of diaper changes, which also came with new smells. I can smell breasted baby poop right now. Neither of us had ever changed a diaper before. All new to us.

I left that place as fast as I could and vowed to do everything possible to avoid getting cut open like that again, surrounded by people who just wanted me to hurry up before the shift changed. (Didn’t work out, but I sure tried.)

One photo. Me immediately upon coming home, with newborn.

That birth experience was the first time I felt like my body failed me. I asked it to do something, breathed like a yogini, and did everything right, but I got the surgery anyway. I’ve always said I’m grateful to La Leche League for helping me succeed at breastfeeding after it taking 5 days to get my milk in and having babies who had to learn to open their mouths. It was healing to know my body could do something I asked it to do, after all.

This may have been garbled. I’m having some internal weirdness going on after being around a lot of negativity. Not the fault of anyone in my immediate family!

Daily Bird

There weren’t enough birds around to pick one! It was a dreary day with morning drizzle. I heard no birds this morning and only five when I tried again in late evening. Even the owl was quiet. Even the house sparrows were quiet! Gads! The loudest bird was the kingfisher, so I salute that bird for being out and about no matter what.

What’s That Glow?

There’s a certain glow here at the ranch house, and it’s not a tree or a menorah. Nor is it the glow of my cheeks from hanging out in the woods listening to birds.

The glow is from the uranium in the gift from my spouse that was procured today. Yep.

There really wasn’t much going on here today, but since we’re going out of town Monday, we didn’t want to camp. So we went for a drive and ended up in scenic Waco, Texas, an hour north of us (though we wandered around to get there.

Now, it’s not like nothing happened. I did my nails. Reindeer Whisperer and a bow.

When we got to Waco we bypassed all tourist attractions, even the ones I like (mammoth remains, cute zoo, wetland park) and just explored different neighborhoods from poor to gentrifying to comfortable to fancy ones by the lake.

I guess it’s pretty sad that my first highlight of the trip was eating at Bush’s Chicken. It’s my favorite, crunchy on the outside and hit and juicy in the inside. Plus there’s fried okra.

After we ate, Lee decided he wanted to go to an antique store, so searched out the closest one. It was a good idea.

We went to an old neighborhood with lots of restored houses, where Show and Tell Antiques is located. (Link is to Facebook page.) This place is great fun for antique lovers and those interested in old houses in need of restoration.

I was too busy looking at stuff in every nook and cranny to take pictures but loved the old kitchen and bathrooms in the 1908 house built for a Doctor Pepper founder (another Waco claim to fame).

Check out that stove and floor in the kitchen!

This place is extra cool. Since I love glassware and china, I had a blast. I also enjoyed talking to family members, who shared lots of history and may have been making sure we didn’t shoplift.

I was amazed at this collection of very old needlework magazines, which I did not get, because, well, I already have a lot of this kind of thing.

I honestly wasn’t going to get anything until I saw two tiny purple hobnail glass containers, probably for matches or toothpicks. They are just perfect t for my window display of purple glass in my bathroom.

Then I went in a dark corner under the stairs. What did I see? Vaseline glass. Not fake. And by gosh there were things shaped like logs. Even the little legs on the items looked like tree stumps.

So, if you aren’t a collector of art glass, you might not know how cool this Vaseline glass (with bonus opalescence) is. It has uranium in it! I know a couple of collectors with many interesting pieces that I’ve enjoyed looking at, but I never had anything. This little set is so perfect for a nature lover…I glowed with love.

The log is a sugar bowl and the pump is a creamer, I learned. By the way, it’s safe to display.

Lee thinks I’m weird but got it for me as a Yule gift, a bit early. We didn’t get much bargaining, but I was ok with it. I’ve checked the prices online. You can pay more or less. But look, it glows in black light!

Now I feel extra justified in buying that black light flashlight!

I’m not sure where I’ll put the little keepsakes. I have them in my bedroom but they disappear against the yellow walls. I’ll put them I. My corner hutch, where I can see them from bed, perhaps. But this pleased me a lot. I always wanted some Vaseline glass, but never found exactly what I wanted. It was this. (The set is not particularly uncommon but not overly plentiful either—it was made by Northwood probably in the early twentieth century.)

As a bonus, I got to enjoy clouds and the sunset on the way home. So good. The sun also glows with scary rays, so it fits!

Daily Bird

It was rather quiet this morning when I went out, but I ended up with 38 birds heard, and some great viewing experiences. The two owls at the top of the post were impressive, but I also enjoyed watching the antics of a teeny red-eyed vireo. But the bird of the day is one I hadn’t heard here until today, the red-breasted nuthatch.

I didn’t see this one, but I heard it. I saw one in Buescher State Park, though, and it was cute as heck going up and down a tree. I’m fond of birds that climb like that, like the brown creeper.

I’ll remember today for so many reasons!