community – Page 5 – The Hermits' Rest

What a Year, with Armadillos

Share what you know about the year you were born.

I was born in 1958. That explains why I don’t have a trending blog and I’m not a social media influencer. I influenced social media when it was a baby.

When I was a baby, Eisenhower was US President. Much good music was being made, as rock music was also in its infancy. Cars were really huge. Most adults smoked cigarettes, including pregnant women, who would then feed their stunted babies home-made formula. Hmm. I’m lucky to be alive and not mentally stunted.

1950s giant car in Florida, it appears. Stock photo.

Other than that…many of my friends were also born in that year, mostly my high school friends. And of course, there were armadillos where I lived (Florida). They were introduced in the 1920s, the same time when my mother was introduced into Florida by birth. Coincidence? Maybe.

Since that’s all I know about 1958, being a semi-aged Boomer and therefore useless and all that, let’s discuss armadillos in Texas, where I find myself in late 2024. It turns out that they brought themselves here, migrating slowly northward from South America.

We’d have gone faster, but we only run in short bursts.

They are so popular here that they are the official state small mammal as of 1995. They are also very populous in some parts of Texas, including here in the Junction area. They don’t live in the Trans Pecos area to the west, though. Anyway. I’ve seen over a dozen since I got here, since they are out more in the daytime in winter.

Geez. So many little armored guys, all of whom were born as identical quintuplets. I saw some young ones playing last year at another state park. Darned cute.

But, did I see any birds today? Why, yes. Here’s one now.

The most exciting birds didn’t get photographed, but I did see as well as hear them on Merlin. They were a fine dark Canyon Towhee and a Western Bluebird. Yeah, I’d never spotted one of those before when I was out west!

The bird blinds still entrance me. I went to the fourth and final one today, which is where the new birds turned up (actually, in the nearby trees; the bird seed was all gone).

Cardinal wants Bewick’s Wren’s peanut butter.

I kept meeting friendly people and not judging them today. I enjoyed telling a woman from Florida about how the bird blinds work. She told me about messing up their Airstream on a narrow bridge. Eek.

No photos of the injured trailer, so enjoy my petunias.

And at a store we visited to get Christmas stuff, I talked to a woman who was cleaning the sink area. She said now she’d have to wash her hands again. I asked why, and she explained that she’d seen someone tidying up a sink area for the next pets, and decided to pass on the kindness. I told her now she’s passed it on to me! That’s the spirit of the season!

It’s also Dallas Cowboy spirit time. They played so hard last night that I put out their flag today.

I bet both those woman were born in 1958! They were cool, on first impression.

Fun Up North

That’s north of Dallas, Texas. My pseudo-granddaughter had her third birthday party today, which provided an excellent excuse to visit her actual grandmother, my friend Pouri.

I drove up yesterday afternoon (still no fun driving through Dallas) and made it in time for a fabulous Persian meal. She overdid it as usual. I’m not complaining, of course. So many herbs, so much flavor. Saffron rice, salad with figs, nuts, and pomegranate…beef kebab and chicken with tasty potatoes. Wow. And there were persimmons for dessert.

Mostly this was a great chance to catch up and talk in a relaxed way. What a wonderful thing to do. That makes two nice talks with old friends in one week! This is the perfect thing to do in uncertain times, be with people you care about.

After a nice sleep in the cute guest room, Pouri gave me a “light” breakfast of many kinds of toast and exquisite preserves, like quince and sour cherries. Pouri is really a great hostess. I tried to take mental notes, but…

She put cute birds in the bathroom for me.

After breakfast, I took a walk around the neighborhood and heard 22 birds. There was a Great Horned Owl and a Cooper’s Hawk, and many overconfident crows.

Apparently this suburb is crawling with wildlife, including multiple bobcats. I saw enough squirrels to scare Anita for life, plus some rabbits, but no bobcats. I’m as intrigued with suburbs as I was last year.

The party was this afternoon at Ellie’s new house. It made me so happy to see how well she and Jimmy have done in their careers and with their daughter. I mean, Ellie just went with it when a vampire theme was requested for the party. All the dripping blood mixed well with the Christmas decor. So cute.

All the children were cute and I got to chat with the extended family some, too. Ellie and I plan to talk next week, when she’s relaxed.

Face painting went over very well. The painter was quite skilled. Pouri and I got flowers. Why not?

I drove back home this evening. So I’m pretty darned tired, especially since I hit a lot of rain. But I’m glad I went. I can’t wait for more catch-up sessions. I’ve been hiding too long.

I didn’t miss the dogs, because Banjo was there. Such a well behaved dog.

Surviving the Spotlight

Have you ever performed on stage or given a speech?

Um. Yes. I probably should have studied acting. I enjoy performing very much, and have since I was a child. I like being someone else, whether doing music or speaking. Most of my speaking has been teaching or training. I enjoy it. Perhaps that’s why I’m a corporate trainer and spent much of my life singing in choruses and harmony groups.

Still, I prefer a friendly audience. Usually that’s not an issue. I mostly sang to friends or people I had things in common with, and I just make the people I’m training into a friendly audience with my relentless friendliness. Who IS that woman?

Here I’m orating at the Grand Canyon, or pretending to be

It’s been a lot harder lately for me to get out in public and “perform.” I admit that the reason I’m so “on” at parties is that it’s more like fake performance Suna is there, not real anxiety-ridden Suna.

My friend Debra and I about to launch into holiday songs. Not really. We just dressed similarly.

I succeeded tonight in doing okay at the Master Naturalist holiday party. I was probably overly outgoing, but I had fun taking pictures and being silly. I’d been really nervous beforehand. I think it’s because I haven’t ventured into a group of people who aren’t all close to me since…October I think.

But it went well and I was pleased with the fun, good food, and gift swap (I got a cool hand-carved whale!). Whew. I did it. I’m tired now, like any introvert is after mingling, but I feel ok. People were kind to me, too.

You’ve all been very kind after yesterday’s dumping of some of my issues. I do want to say we will have enough land for horse pastures; just not how I’d wanted it. I wasn’t dry clear. Thank you all for caring.

Pondering

It’s probably a luxury and sign of my privileged status that I’m able to ponder upon what to do in the near future to protect my more distant future. Still, people my age tend to be pondering about many age-related potential occurrences.

Sometimes I feel like an empty seed head, like I’ve fulfilled my purpose and am done now.

Do we work for pay every day until we die? Can we retire and finance our needs ourselves? Will we need help from children or other relatives as we age and decline in health? What’s the best strategy that will give us a comfortable old age?

Anita plans to get her advice from Goldie. She’s wise for her age.

Heck if I know. I thought we had things set up in one way, but things unexpectedly changed, and we have to pivot. Our neighbor, Sara, who I do my horse stuff with, is escaping Texas to start a regenerative farm business in Wisconsin with members of her family. This is exciting for them!

Apache will miss his lesson and show buddy.

But that’s meant we’ve had little choice but to sell the vast majority of the ranch, which we owned together. And the very nice people we are selling to also wanted some of the property we owned outright. With times being what they are, Lee wants to liquidate assets, so this is all going to happen.

If you’re wondering why my anxiety is high and I’m sad, well, this is part of it. I won’t own any of the creek or woods any longer. My plans for a consternation [hilarious typo; I meant conservation] easement are no longer possible. We could not afford to buy out the other half of the ranch to do that; we’d hoped to do it later.

We’d hoped for a few more years of Aragorn in Christmas tack.

The fact that we will soon only have a “ranchette” (not popular with the locals) does give us more options. So we have to ponder them. The agreement we made not to fence in the acres right behind the house means I can’t put in another pasture for the horses. It’s hard to support four horses on what we have.

It better support one attractive rooster!

So, lots to ponder, lots to keep me up at night, and that’s not even bringing in the unknown of the next four years and how it will affect us, right as we would need to start relying on Social Security and Medicare, which we’ve paid into since we were teenagers.

Change is inevitable; we all know that. I can deal with it in small doses with time to prepare. This stuff? I’ll remind myself to put one foot in front of the other and notice the good, the beauty, and the inspiration that occurs every day. Right?

I’m not planning to run away like this bunny!

What’s the Traditional Gift for Your Sixteenth Anniversary?

I didn’t look it up, so I’m not sure what the official gift is. But, according to my friends Tarrin and Teddy, the gift is a nice rooster ( as opposed to a mean one).

The rooster magically appeared on their property, where he tried to fit in, but was chased by cattle, horses, dogs, and the roosters who already live there. He was too nice to just dispose of, so I volunteered to take him, since I still miss Bruce, our previous very nice fellow.

I put him in the roost with Bianca, figuring they’ll sleep together and be more likely to get along. Maybe he will encourage the Cochins Cathy and Cindy to sleep indoors. I hope so, since it’s cooled off and rain is forecast.

More fowl news to come soon, so stay tuned.

In addition to a horse lesson and chicken pickup, I spent a little while with my friends Pamela and Linda Jo, doing a BioBlitz across the road from Pamela, where the landowner intends to clear all the plants to create a pasture. We recorded all we found, including a variety of native trees.

We found 78 species, which shows the diversity hiding in our Milam County landscape.

There may be more observations uploaded to our iNaturalist project, which I look forward to. I’m finding a bit more peace being around people who are good friends and love our plants and animals.

Who Needs Sleep?

If you didn’t need sleep, what would you do with all the extra time?

Let’s all remember that resting is good for us, and sleep is important for a healthy brain. But, if I didn’t have to sleep I’d spend more time with the horses. I could ride the rideable ones and work with the others much more often.

I would be able to tell my equine friends how much I value them, just as they are. They don’t have to perform to be valued. I’d tell Drew that a lot. I don’t think he likes the stuff we ask him to do anymore.

I like eating and walking around with Suna.

Of course some of the time I’d spend with birds and other woodland folk. I could watch flowers grow or help restore native habitat.

If I could do birds AND horses it would be ideal. This photo at Tarrin’s also contains Robins and I think a Killdeer.

I would spend the dark hours knitting or crocheting, reading, and writing. Hanging out with Lee would get a chunk of time, too. Hey that’s not much different from today. I’d meditate a lot, too.

Perhaps I could work on something other than this project.

And maybe with more awake hours I could do better at keeping up with beloved friends and family. That’s important.

The horses and dogs also count as beloved friends

So, no, I would not save the world, but I’d relish my world and try to make my community a happier place

I’d watch cranes when they’re going south or north!

Point: I enjoy sleeping. I’d miss it.

My Favorites

Who are your current most favorite people?

I’ll tell you who my favorite people are right now. They are the ones who:

Care about Mother Earth and show it
Believe everyone has a right to be their authentic selves
Work to protect and support their communities
Are capable of disagreeing respectfully
Do their best to keep learning and loving their whole lives
Accept that they can’t always do all of these things all the time, and extend grace to themselves

If I were a betting person, I’d wager that you are one of my favorite people.

Committed to Telling People What They Mean to Me.

This afternoon, Lee, our friend Martha, and I drove back to our old haunt, Live Oak Unitarian Universalist Church in Cedar Park. Due to some PTSD (at least on my part), it doesn’t happen often. But there we were, right where we used to be.

And there I was, doing what I used to do, singing with Bill. He asked me to join him, so I tried to remember how to sing.

A dear friend, Esther, passed away recently, and the Celebration of Life was today. This couple was a role model for our marriage, support when Lee’s dad was ill. I sang in the church choir for many years with Jim, and he brought me fish and game from time to time (I loved threatening to make squirrel stew from his bounty). He hated squirrels as much as Anita does.

As I listened to Jim share the touching story of their long and loving marriage, followed by funny and moving stories about Esther from their children and more, it occurred to me how Esther would have enjoyed the evening. Gee, most of the family are professional writers, so anyone would have enjoyed it.

My choir and women’s group friends with Jim.

What sparked in me was a desire to let all my old friends I saw at the service know how much I appreciated them and their contributions to my life. I did a lot of extra-hard hugging of my women’s group buddies and former choir friends. And a few people were probably a bit embarrassed to hear me tell them how much they mean to me. I was sorry a couple of people had to leave early. I’d have blubbered even more.

I blubbered at Ricky because he called me “Sue-Nanna,” which is what he always called me. Then we talked about football and golf.

But, in these uncertain times, I don’t know when I’ll see some of these kind and loving souls again. If I didn’t tell them now, when would I? I just looked into their faces and wanted to savor every moment.

I see them on Facebook all the time, but their in-person faces. Ahhh.

Please, if you get a chance to see people you care deeply about, tell them. Show them. It won’t hurt to tell them multiple times. It helps counteract some of the negativity. I’m glad Lee, Martha, and I got to do it.

I’m committed to telling everyone I see that I care about how much they mean to me now, while I can.

The Owls’ Lesson

Owls are everywhere in my life now. You may recall that I saw the same Great Horned Owl (I assume) each time I walked through the woods on the prayer trail on Hilton Head. It would fly up a new branch where I could see and hear it but not photograph it.

Eternally grateful to this healing space.

Since I got back to the Hermits’ Rest on Sunday, owls have been calling morning and night. I’ve heard them occasionally before, but even the Merlin app has heart multiple Great Horned Owls calling back and forth.

Late yesterday afternoon, we were talking to the man who leases our property for his cattle and the owls were so loud we had to stop our conversation. I began to wonder if they were trying to get my attention.

Now, I doubt the owls give us humans a second thought. Still, this morning I heard them, as well as all dusk and into the night. Sometimes it was like owl stereo.

I have not been at all grounded since we got back to Texas. Yesterday I had that annoying buzzy head and feeling my blood rushing that I used to get often. Today I was in panic attack mode most of the morning, barely able to speak. Then my nervous stomach kicked in to where I couldn’t go to my horse lesson. I was feeling puny and powerless.

I was also prickly like this noseburn vine!

After feeding the horses, I sat down to try for the third time of the day to breathe and meditate. That’s when the owls went into heavy hooting mode. So I just listened. Finally, I was able to regulate my breathing and get back into the moment…just in time for flocks of Sandhill Cranes to clamor their way across the crisp afternoon sky.

I thought about what lesson I could draw from being surrounded by these apex predators. What could I take on for myself?

Owls aren’t in your face. They blend in with their surroundings and keep their power to themselves until they need it. That seems like a useful strategy to borrow.

Owls have their communities (hoot, hoot) and stay in touch with their beloved members. I need to do that better, especially with those not on social media. I’m thankful to those who prod me to keep in touch.

Most important to me is that owls know where they fit in with the grand scheme of things. They help keep prey populations from growing too large, but don’t take more than they need. They act as if the trees, meadows, mice, and birds are not less important than them. I think humans (me) could learn from this.

I’m grateful to the owls for reminding me to stay focused on the here and now and to hold on to my strength for when I’ll need it.

Grief comes in waves, and sometimes they push you under for a while. Today I let waves of grief and fear wash over me, though I’m not sure why it hit today. If you are one of those who struggled today, remember you’re not alone and can try to soar and swoop like the cranes and owls tomorrow.

Blessed be.

Gaining Ground through Grounding

I’ve made a couple of resolutions today. You could even call them goals. One’s pretty easy, but vital, and the other is harder if you’re a hermit.

I’m going to spend even more time outdoors to keep myself grounded.
I want to do something kind for someone every day – something that might not occur to me to do if I wasn’t being conscious about it.

How did I do?

Today it wasn’t so rainy, so I was able to get out and about multiple times today as I sought out the quiet, natural parts of this very green but rather loud island where I’m staying (Hilton Head). I was seeking the ability to really ground myself and bring back my sense of peace and lovingkindness.

The first time I went for a walk, I looked for new natural spots. Mostly I found leaf blowers, garbage trucks, and construction equipment, but I did eventually come to a little hidden path where the birds were gathering and there were many interesting plants.

I took lots of photos of seeds, berries, and weird fungi, but I didn’t feel very grounded. Plus I was not thrilled to realize halfway through this rather long walk that I’d left the Apple Watch on the charger. Oh no! My exercise didn’t count! (I realized it did count, health-wise, but not watch-wise.)

It’s weird only working four days a week. It’s even weirder on an island with no transportation. So, after a little rest and putting my watch back on, I headed for the beach. It was an interesting day there, because fog had lingered way past mid-day. I was able to see a cormorant fishing, as well as the usual pelicans, gulls, and Sanderlings. Here is also where I accomplished goal number two and was rewarded greatly.

I saw a woman struggling to put up a shade cover all by herself. At first I thought, oh she can handle it. Then I bravely (for me) went up and asked if she could use some help. She could! So, I wrestled with her wiggly setup and we got it working. As we talked, it turned out she is an editor at a horse magazine and has a horse much like Apache, only larger. So we each enjoyed talking about PPID, working equitation, and horse nutrition. So far, doing kind things is working out great, at least on the first day.

After another rest, okay, actually a long nap, I realized that I still hadn’t gotten to the really grounded state I need to find every day to keep my spirits up and not fall into my doomsday thinking. By now it was near sunset, which is ridiculously early thanks to Standard Time. I headed back out, this time with a plan I was sure would work: I went back to the Presbyterian prayer trail.

This is a magical couple of acres that is chock-full of native trees and shrubs that have been allowed to live out their lives, like Wohlleben recommends. It’s because Hilton Head Island was isolated for most of the time intense logging was done, and occupied just by the Gullah folks who mostly did small farming plots and a lot of fishing. There are still old-growth forests here.

I looked at the map and realized there were more trails than I’d been on last time. I got deep within the woods and was able to set on a Leopold bench and meditate. The trees masked traffic and children playing to where I could just breathe as the Hermit Thrush called and called. I got the feeling I needed.

I knew I was on the right path literally and metaphorically when something moved next to the creek at the back of the trail. It was a very large bird. When it settled, I realized it was an owl, a Great Horned Owl. Merlin doesn’t even have them listed as a possible bird here. But, there it was. No photos of the owl. I was just looking through my eyes, not a phone.

When I realized the sun had set, I headed off to find the beach again, which was not easy, since the nearest beach access was actually closed. I managed to get into the Marriott resort, though, where I found a very loud Mockingbird that led to another random conversation, this time with a like-minded birder from England.

The beach didn’t disappoint me this time, as I got to see the beautiful reflections of the clouds in the tidal pools. I have such fond memories of coming here with Anita and enjoying these views together. The moon was out and reflected in the water, which was magical. What felt like a miracle occurred. I got that feeling of deep contentment that I get when Nature surprises me. I was happy for the first time in quite some time, probably since the last horse show.

You should be glad I edited these down to just four.

We all have things we need to keep going. I’m glad that my needs aren’t to put others down, to think only of my own personal gains, or to dominate. Being grounded and finding ways to be kind to others is what I’ll rely on as times get challenging.