bloganuary – Page 2 – The Hermits' Rest

Should We Abandon the Leader Ship?

What makes a good leader?

I have thoughts on what makes a good leader. I’m afraid that my thoughts are really about what kind of leader I prefer, not who meets some objective criteria of “success.”

Goldie is a firm but fun leader of her pack.

If I need to be on a team or work group, I like to be led by someone who is more of a mentor and facilitates the folks they lead to do the best they can at their job, sport, or spiritual pursuit. They encourage and support, yet provide helpful criticism. They are also willing to do hard things like take responsibility for what the group does and make decisions like who to cut from the team, etc.

I try to be that kind of leader. I’ve had some success and some painful failures at leading volunteers and paid teams. What hurts me the most is when I try to protect my team from unpleasant stuff, but it doesn’t work out. I still feel bad for the LLLOnline team.

Currently I have no intention to lead anything, ever, again, even in a token role. I have abandoned the leader ship and am now a happy team member who has way too much input sometimes. I’m now secretary for two groups I once held more responsibilities in. I like that.

Anyway, I think good leaders show respect and spend more time helping their team do well than trying to get ahead, win, or take credit.

On the Home Front

The tack room at the ranch is getting a much-needed upgrade. We’ve limped along with tarp covering its ancient shingled roof, but the winds in recent days have shredded the latest tarp and blown off more shingles.

So the men of the house decided to replace the roof in a permanent way, with a lovely metal roof that matches the rest of the ranch buildings.

Of course, the weather has not helped much. Both days it’s been worked on have been bitterly cold, and today the gales were coming from the north again. I really felt for those guys slapping big sheets of metal around in that wind! I’m glad they brought in professional subcontractors to do a lot of the work.

I can’t wait to show you the finished product, but it will have to wait until I’m back home. We dragged the RV out to northeast Texas to camp on a big lake. I haven’t seen it yet, since we arrived late. I’ll talk about that tomorrow!

You Can’t Un-Invent War

If you could un-invent something, what would it be?

I saw this question and said, well, this is like going back in time and changing one thing, only to realize the consequences are horrible. Like the butterfly effect?

I first thought I’d un-invent guns. Then I thought that would be too complicated. What about hunting for food? But there are other ways to hunt. I don’t know. Maybe just un-invent automatic weapons and weapons of mass destruction.

Then I mused, well, we wouldn’t need those horrible things if there were no wars. If people lived together peacefully we’d not be fighting all the time.

We could just look at pretty horses. Ahh. I love watching Drew.

But people fight. It’s part of being human. And so much of civilization arose because of conflicts between groups of people. They lead to innovations, migrations, and of course heterozygous vigor. Maybe we’d be a very different species if it weren’t for these tendencies to want to eliminate “the other.” We aren’t alone. Other mammals, birds, insects, etc., do it.

People fight, and horses get annoyed. Drew is not pleased at how much work Tarrin made him do.

So. Screw it. I wouldn’t be able to make war not exist. And if our current weapons went away, we’d have something worse, or just go around poisoning each other. We may do that anyway, clever humans as we are.

I don’t like humans as a concept, I’m afraid. Or in real life, as a whole. I do like the urge to be kind, help each other, and create communities, which I hope is as strong as the urge to eliminate people unlike ourselves. We will see, maybe sooner rather than later.

My apologies that the blogs haven’t been very interesting this week. I’m lacking in writing inspiration. Tomorrow will be more interesting, I’m sure.

Drew had a hard afternoon. He was really scared by construction noise by the tack room when I tried to groom him. I ended up taking him to lessons early so he could relax a bit. It worked. He was only a little squirrelly for me, and Tarrin helped him stretch.

Daily Birds

It was a glorious and beautiful day today. Hard to believe it was 12° yesterday and 70° today. That’s Texas for you. I truly enjoyed standing in the woods surrounded by sparrows, chickadees, and titmice being their most cacophonous selves. Here’s to the tiny birds of the woodlands and their big voices!

The other bird is an intriguing mystery. Every time I go to Tarrin’s Merlin hears an Osprey. I don’t hear it, and I certainly haven’t seen it. I guess there are enough large ponds nearby to support one?

What I did see was this downy woodpecker.

Speaking of Love – and Hawks

Can you share a positive example of where you’ve felt loved?

Woo hoo. Today’s prompt goes with my day’s experience. So, let’s blog.

I’ve figured out that one of my “love languages” is the one about giving time and effort. When someone spends time doing something to make my life better, I feel love.

One example is how incredibly grateful and loved I felt when I came home from a trip expecting improvements to my horse area, but was blown away to see that two portable buildings we had were now a beautiful and large hen house with the interior painted “my” colors and a HUGE new tack room that would hold all my horse supplies and have a sitting area. I was blown away.

Note that they painted the hay storage container to match the building.

Every time I go in either of those buildings I have warm feelings about the two guys in my family who worked so hard on it. They were my son’s first two carpentry projects, so there are imperfections, but they’re charming to me. And I think of the stories behind how they got all the furnishings and built the saddle racks and pegs for halters, etc.

The other time I felt loved like this was when Lee gave me my bird journal. I couldn’t believe he’d spent so much time collecting bird photos then made the book by hand. I get to feel loved every day when I write in it!

He also made this cute book cover for the journal.

Love Birds of the Day

The highlight of my day today was all about love. After making many trips back and forth to the horse trough with water, I decided to go listen to birds for a while. Today got down to 12°F but then warmed up to 45°. That felt balmy!

You probably can’t tell, but the pond iced over.

As I headed towards the woods with my empty water containers, I saw movement. It was the pair of red-tailed hawks I’ve been watching for a few weeks. They were doing an awesome love dance. I was transfixed as I watched them soar and glide, then dive down near the ground and up through the trees.

The only photo I got of them flying. I was too busy watching most of the time.

It was so graceful yet strong. I felt privileged to get to see this up close. It was the closest I’ve ever been to flying hawks. They flew right past me a couple of times. At last, they rested in the trees for a bit.

They are both in this picture. One flying low in front of the trees, one higher, behind trees.

Then, off they went, flashing their wings at me. That made up for the hard work. I loved those love birds.

I made it a loop

PS: thanks to everyone who tells me they read my blog. I feel like the lady on Romper Room (a television show from my youth), who would look in her magic mirror and say, “I see Susie and Donny…” or whoever’s parents had sent her a postcard.

I see you, Mike, Donita, Lory, Libba, Catherine, Barbara, Debi…and so many more!

Clutter, Not My Favorite Word

Where can you reduce clutter in your life?

I will first tell you where I want to reduce clutter: in my head. That goal is slowly coming to fruition as I discard guilt over past mistakes, sadness over lost lives and friends, my endless lists of rules I think I have to follow so my friends and family won’t desert me, etc. (Abandonment issues? Yes, thanks Mom.)

How to cope? Go out and watch deer when it’s 18°.

The last thing is still a big issue. I want to be considerate of others and respect their boundaries and wishes, but I don’t want to constantly second guess myself in deference to others. What topics do I avoid with Person X? Remember not to argue with Person Y! Never mention Person Z by name! It’s a balance. It’s definitely the reason I’m quieter now.

So, yup, I need to sweep out some mental clutter. It’s a good goal.

However. As for household clutter.

I’m not a minimalist. I enjoy having things to look at in my environment that I enjoy. Like I’ve mentioned before, some objects seem to carry a spirit somehow, of people who made them or gave them to me…they have meaning. So don’t tell me my house is full of clutter. I like it that way. If I want to live in a bland hotel I can go to a condo.

At least I keep the birds outside…except for my bird journal. Clutter.

That said, my house bothers me right now because there is mess. To me, mess is stuff with no purpose that is just sitting around waiting for someone to do something about it. There are boxes of yarn I can’t fit in my office closet because it needs to be rearranged to add shelves and such. There are two china hutches in the entryway, because I can’t move the big one so I can empty out the small one and trade things out. There are paintings and needlework that need to be hung. All this is from my Austin house and former office. IRS hard to consolidate.

I should just sleep outside. These guys do.

So I do need to rearrange things, remove what isn’t meaningful to me, and get the house back in order. Oh, and remove magazines that have been read so others can enjoy them.

But there will still be “clutter,” just organized into collections.

It’s too cold for daily birds, but I did see a lot of woodpeckers flying around today. After tonight, the Arctic air will head off and we will be back to more normal winter weather.

I’m still waiting for my yarn to arrive so I can do these extra cold days on the temperature blanket. Yes. Last year’s blanket is now “clutter” until I can attach the segments and photograph it. Soon!

Yes, I Like Horses, Even Cold Ones

What is your favorite animal?

I think anyone who has read a couple of entries in this blog can figure out that I’m fond of horses. I always have been, even though most of my life I had neither the space nor the funds to have any. I’m so incredibly grateful for the chance to work with horses now.

They have plenty of food and water! And of course their new shelter.

Horses have fascinated me since I figured out they existed, but I’ve also loved dogs my whole life. I think regular readers can also figure that out.

I’ve had cats when I lived in apartments, but I had a couple that made me decide I like them better at other people’s houses. Cat pee is not a thing I can handle well. Plus, Lee has one of his many allergies to cats, and outdoor cats don’t last long here due to hawks, owls, coyotes, and guardian dogs.

I could use a barn cat, though. Sigh. Mice are another cute animal I’d prefer not to cohabit with.

It’s the coldest day I can remember here, but we’re coping. I’ve especially enjoyed watching the animals running around in the dusting of snow and/or ice. Penney and Carlton seem to be energized by it, and seem to smell many new smells. Alfred was out all day, since he was made for this stuff. Goldie goes out to annoy cattle but doesn’t seem thrilled. Harvey and Vlassic run out to pee and go back in.

The horses have spent less time in their shelters than I expected. Instead they’ve been eating a little more than usual, as expected, and are playing on the crunchy pasture. As a wise family member has said, they are livestock, after all. They are smart enough to crack the ice in their water trough without my help, too. Huh.

The chickens appreciate their heat lamps, but they are not alone. I was a bit startled when I opened the hen house to get food and leave water for them, because there were dozens of house sparrows in there with them. I startled them, too. everyone flew right out.

No bird photos, because I only took these few outside.

As for us humans, the heater downstairs had trouble coping with these 14° temperatures, but upstairs was great. If only my work area and television were upstairs. We found some oil heaters that came with the horse trailer and put one in my office for my Zoom chats and one by where Lee and I sit to watch football. We have plenty of afghans, so it was cozy enough.

One more really cold day and normal winter will return.

How to Keep Up Online

In what ways do you communicate online?

Greetings from the Polar Vortex where it finally got cold, even way down here in Texas.

We’ve been busy keeping ourselves and the dogs warm

Today’s question is harder than it seems. It forces me to admit something that kind of makes me sad: I’m no longer an internet pioneer. Y’all, I’m even in a couple of books for being an early feminist voice on the ‘net. I made websites before color monitors existed. I had email way before most people did, thanks to being at the University of Illinois.

I helped make online communities before Facebook. So what? Yep. That’s the past. Zzz.

I no longer keep up with things. Twitter bored me, I have to admit. I also don’t enjoy watching videos for very long (amusing since I create them every day at work). So I’m not on YouTube for hours. And I cannot tell you how annoying and boring I find Tik Tok and Reels and social media influencers.

Please enjoy them and tell me about it, though. I am fine experiencing those things second hand.

So. Boring senior citizen Suna communicates online mainly in Facebook and communities there, and by reading and writing blogs.

I text friends and family a lot, and enjoy my text groups with them. Certainly I’m up on Cameron news thanks to that! I also really enjoy online Zoom meetings that started in the pandemic but are now just nice ways to keep in touch with people I used to email a lot. I feel so close to friends all over the place!

Email is there still, but mostly for work or nonprofit stuff. The few email lists I’m still on don’t get much of my attention these days, because I run out of time.

For what it’s worth, that’s that. I enjoy the online communities as much as the in-person ones, though. I like blog comments and interacting with readers, a lot. So thanks to you commenters and silent readers. You know who you are!

It’s too cold to have a daily bird, though I did enjoy looking at puffy sparrows today. It’s supposed to snow tomorrow. I know the chickens are enjoying their heat lamps and the horses appreciate the new shelter. I tested both of them out today!

Our heater is still working, so us humans are coping well with 19° F weather. The heat pump unit got wrapped in insulation, so it’s not failing when it got into the 20s like it used to. We are getting stuff figured out, thanks to the brain power of the ranch commune.

The far left square is today. That’s the coldest day I’ve recorded!

It may snow tomorrow! I bet I take pictures. What do you think?

Road Trips and Staying Put

Think back on your most memorable road trip.

Lee and I have been on many memorable road trips, and I hope we have lots more. We made a lot of memories the time we took our first big RV, Ursula, to New Mexico in 2012. We first visited my friend Steve from grad school and his husband, Guy. They lived in Las Cruces at the time.

The only photo I can find from this trip. There were tons in my old blog.

We did so much in southern New Mexico, and we’re only slightly creeped out by surveillance drones. This was long before Build That Wall. I had the best Mexican food ever and saw so many great rocks. And old Las Cruces!

I got to watch Guy work with his rodeo horses at liberty. It was the first time I ever saw such a thing. Guy was so good with the animals and I guess was good under saddle as well since he had a huge saddle he won at gay rodeo in the house.

Later we drove farther north and went through deserts and forests, saw White Sands and the Malpais. We visited petroglyphs and a trading post we returned to on later trips for my turquoise needs.

Since I have no photos, here’s our woods today.

Other than the RV breaking down, all was well. We need to visit Steve again where he is now that he’s a widower.

We aren’t going anywhere this weekend. We were scheduled to camp, but chose to stay home and prepare for the bad weather that’s coming tomorrow. It’s our turn at last.

Who needs to travel when you can watch horses play?

The highlight of preparation was getting some sides added to the horse pens to add a lot more shelter from the wind and cold. Here’s how it looked before.

I was impressed that they got red metal to make the sides from. I didn’t expect coordination! Here are some in progress photos.

It really looks snazzy now that it’s done, and it’s very sturdy. May as well do it right the first time. Next we will get more covered roof for summer shade and rain protection. There will be gutters! Anyway, here’s how it looks now.

We hope the horses use the new shelter. My guys looked pretty displeased.

Daily Bird

I’m just gonna declare all the sparrows birds of the day, because they were just so cute today bopping around through the trees. I didn’t bother them one bit. Enjoy them.

We’re ready for the cold and maybe snow tomorrow. Hope we got everything safe and snug.

Snacks? Really? Geez.

What snack would you eat right now?

Could the questions get any more trivial? I’m actually full from a delicious dinner of boneless pork ribs slow roasted in my covered baking thing from Pampered Chef. I can’t remember what it’s called but it sure makes good, moist meat.

It’s this thing. I looked it up. It’s a New Traditions Deep Dish Covered Stoneware Baker. Cranberry.

I also had a baked sweet potato and less yummy cooked radishes (they were okay), and mixed veggies I made for Lee.

Perhaps my snack was the bourbon old fashioned I made with bourbon and syrup from the Hilton Head Distillery.

I’ll visit Hilton Head this year but until then, here’s the sky this evening. I was listening to a Great Horned Owl.

That’s as fascinating as I can make snacks. I’m actually not a big snacker. Sometimes I eat snack foods for meals. My big indulgence is Goldfish crackers. Not ideal food. But I don’t do that more than a couple of times a year.

I didn’t have much else to talk about today anyway. It was cold and horridly windy, and the Polar Vortex isn’t even here yet. I can only look forward to using more colors in this year’s temperature blanket than last year’s. Yes! Freezing but pretty!

Animals are fine. I wish you could have seen Fiona directing me to which burs she wanted me to remove first. Her “underarm” area was really bugging her. She’s such a smart little creature.

All the horses decided to eat on top of their “hill” (dirt from digging the pond last year).

Carlton seems no worse for wear after his surgery yesterday. He isn’t licking the incision at all, probably because Goldie is still watching him.

See, I can jump up and ask to be let out of the fenced area!

Better stuff tomorrow, friends.

Animal Care Is a Crazy Business

Come up with a crazy business idea.

It would be crazy, but good, if there were a way to make money caring for your own animals. But no, instead they cost money. But I don’t begrudge the professionals who help me care for my animal buddies the major bucks I pay them. After all, it improves all of our qualities of life!

I completely turned around the blog prompt again. Jackie, I hope that gave you a chuckle.

This topic is on my mind for a couple of reasons. First, it was horsie spa day again, as Jackie came to do bodywork on Drew and Apache. Drew went first, since Apache ran off when I first approached him with a halter. I guess he’s not THAT lame.

Jackie found a couple of things that might be contributing to his dislike of bending, including something on his hoof I hadn’t noticed before. He visibly improved in his shoulder after she worked on him. It’s so cool what she can do!

Apache did a little of yawning and releasing.

Apache really benefited from all the work he got, as you can see. He was in pretty good shape other than the abscess, which agrees with my assessment.

His confirmation was looking so good that I asked Jackie to hold him for a picture. Even in his winter coat, he looks good.

I truly appreciate all Jackie can do. She is so gentle and soft with the horses but she gets them all stretched out!

The other animal care event happened to my dear Carlton. He’d had a “thing” that looked like a little pink nub on his back haunch. Dr Amy had said to just watch it, which we did. Last week he started messing with it and made it bleed, so he went in to have it looked at this afternoon.

In this picture from January it’s a tiny dot.

I was working so I couldn’t go, but I hear he didn’t get out of the truck. Dr Amy managed to take a dime-sized tumor out and sent it off for analysis. Let’s hope it’s all okay.

He has internal stitches and external staples. I bet it heals very nicely – or he will have a cool scar.

He’s been under good care and the watchful eye of Nurse Goldie. I knew he’d be in good hands (or paws) while I was at the Master Naturalist meeting, though I was a bit out of sorts there for a while.

When Goldie went into the bedroom after she ate, Carlton turned to Lee. Everybody took care of him.

He’s been very expensive for a pound puppy, but the love he gives us makes it all worthwhile. I’m so glad we have our dog pack and horse herd.

My Attachment to Objects Started Early

Describe an item you were incredibly attached to as a youth. What became of it?

I’ll answer this question about the first and second items I became attached to as a baby. I was one of those babies who had to have their beloved object with them at all times. I guess my attachment issues started early? Anyway, here’s me as a round baby with Hee Haw, whom I may have mentioned before.

I don’t think I owned clothing as a baby.

Hee Haw was a stuffed giraffe. I thought it was a horse. Mom told me horses said “Hee Haw” so there you go. I know Mom knew horses. But she liked what donkeys say better.

I’m told putting this toy in the laundry traumatized me, as did the time I dropped it in a store. Luckily it was found. By the time Hee Haw disintegrated I’d moved on to my next and final security objective, a literal security blanket.

I’m sure I have photos of Lovin’ Blanket, or LB as Mom called it, but none scanned. It originally was a quilted satin layette blanket with a lovely binding that Granny Kendall gave me. I held it as I went to sleep each night.

Like, I did that a long time. By the time I was in high school all the quilted satin was gone, and it was just an edge. It was all knotted up, and I draped it over my bedpost. It stayed there through college. I guess Dad gave it a dignified farewell when he moved to North Carolina after Mom died.

There. I got that tired old story out of my system.

Imagine dozens of white-crowned sparrows here.

I don’t have any exciting birds for today, so I’ll give you some pictures of my current fuzzy security item. Sara and I both agree that Apache has the greatest neck for hugging. He makes everything all better.

He is still a bit lame from the abscess. I keep treating him. Here is his bad hoof. Send healing thoughts!

There is redness but the vertical things are grass shadows.