This morning, I did my chores and realized it was a bad day for birding—too windy. So I came inside to work on Master Naturalist projects.
Windblown Engelmann Daisy.
At 12:50 I realized I’d worked as much as I would have for paid employment. That’s always been the way I am. I make up a job if I don’t have one. In college I was always typing something for someone. In grad school I knitted. When I was supposed to be a mother at home I created a web design empire and nonprofit online community for other mothers (with a team).
I needed to chill out and look at birds more, even back then. Red-tailed Hawk.
Now I’m retired, so I either write all day or do social media for my current nonprofit. I fixed up the Wild Wings Bird Sanctuary site for those four hours this morning. Time flies when you’re typing, as I discovered in my teens.
Time also flies when you’re identifying native plants. Texas verbena.
I guess I now see how all those older Master Naturalist folks get thousands of volunteer hours: they have time. It keeps me out of trouble and out of the horses’ faces for at least part of the day, too.
They watched me take this photo of the “best” wildflowers this spring. It’s been a bad year.
Probably that’s for the best, since I keep getting stepped on (Mabel in a tizzy over distractions) or walked into fences (Apache learning to move his butt). Tomorrow I have to corral them all again for their annual shots. We will see who steps on whom.
That’s the truth! It’s a lesson that’s been kicking at me for the past six months or so. I really didn’t want to stop working. I really didn’t want to give up the fun I always had buying clothing, shoes, and decorations for my space. I didn’t want to give up on people who’d been important to me in the past or ideals I felt it important to uphold at great cost.
I don’t think I have to always have a bur-free donkey, but Fiona sure looks better. And she is finally shedding!
But I’ve done it. I realized what I thought was right for me actually wasn’t. The transition can be painful. I’ve had a pretty crappy few months, though I’ve tried to share the good stuff here. But I think I’m okay now.
When worst comes to worst, I can just share flowers. Silverleaf nightshade Solanum elaeagnifolium
I’m back to coping with an amount of stress I can handle for the most part, which is the only way to get through the huge transition our society is going through with dignity and grace. I’m grateful for friends and mentors who’ve helped out. We all need community support. Having my online friends, my lunch buddies, and my husband and son remind me of what’s good and I hope I give that back.
I got to hang out at our bird sanctuary today with fellow Master Naturalists. That was so good for my soul.
Today I realized I’m not the only one who struggles with transition and change. My poor Apache horse really likes a predictable life. Surprises like the farrier or a horse show aren’t his favorites.
Mabel disliked the hoof surprise a lot, too. She wouldn’t go into a pen to eat today. That pleased the donkey.
Today was riding day, so Apache got all groomed and pretty and did fine on his groundwork, though he still dislikes jumping what he considers a “high” jump.
Do these shoes make me look awkward?
He was displeased at having to go to the new location of the round pen to do the riding. I didn’t push him, just walked and trotted, stopped and started, and leg yielded. However, Lee had mowed some “trails” for us, so I tried Apache out on them. It was funny to see him go into his panic at the unfamiliar, doing his direction changes and left turns.
Why did you make me do this? I do t need personal growth.
Yes, I’ve finally gotten to where I find it more funny than scary, and helped him get some walking on the path done. And when I got off, he had to go back in the round pen and breathe for a while. I figure he’ll get better. He always does, just like me.
I guess the trees are scary. I couldn’t get good photos of him because he thinks he has to move when I move.
Onward and upward, trying to get through transition as smoothly as possible for both me and the animals.
When you’re an old member of the intellectual elite (I have been told that’s what I am, even though I no longer speak and write academic English), you get used to knowing at least a little about most topics speakers present at meetings. Tonight I was thrilled to hear a speaker at our monthly Master Naturalist meeting on a topic I was unfamiliar with.
Also a blimp flew over today, which is rare here.
The speaker was Thomas Ronge, “a polar marine geologist and climate scientist, working as an Expedition Project Manager and Staff Scientist for the International Ocean Discovery Program (aka IODP)” (his description on BlueSky). His agency has a new name, Scientific Ocean Drilling Coordination Office (SODCO). Apparently name changes are frequent. He told us about how he has worked to get samples of sediment from the ocean floor using really cool drilling and sampling technologies, all on an amazing science ship.
It just was so much fun to learn about how carbon dioxide is stored in ice, the causes of rising sea levels, and why the research done by his teams is so important to us regular folks. Ronge made the complex ideas easy to understand and his subtle humor was a fine touch. I couldn’t believe this was his first presentation in English (he’s from Germany).
This is the research ship whose expeditions he coordinated, the JOIDES Resolution. It just got retired. (Photo by T Ronge)
Want to learn more? The website for IODP has links to many interesting articles on what scientists learned on the ship.
That presentation was the highlight of my day, though I had to laugh at how I looked by the end of the meeting part of the evening. I got my roadrunner recertification pin for 2025 and a third place ribbon for how many hours I’ve volunteered so far this year. That’s because it’s National Volunteer Month, or something.
This is me and our treasurer, Debra, with our pins. Patsy in the middle is the membership chair, a huge job.
My friends Donna and Linda Jo were the top two active hours earners since our chapter started. I love this picture I took after they realized how long it would take them to get their next milestones!
You can do it, gals!
That’s all you get from this satisfied learner tonight.
You’re writing your autobiography. What’s your opening sentence?
My lifelong self-improvement project is still chugging along.
That’s what it feels like right now, it’s an endless parade with yet another effing growth opportunity coming to knock me back down so I get to show how much I’ve grown and how well I handle my extreme anxiety and self esteem challenges. Whee. Also, long sentences.
Ominous clouds from last night.
To top it all off, we have no power, thanks to a huge storm passing over us this morning. Great way to start my last week of employment.
Yesterday I wasn’t working but did meet with my boss for about eight minutes during which I heard how great I am and how much I have helped the organization. However, I’m too expensive. It sounded like a lot of contractors were getting the boot. I wasn’t surprised about this, so I have already cut spending, eliminated many payments, etc. I’m sensible.
Like the bluebonnets, my goal is to get through this spring.
I am also human, so once we got the RV packed and headed home, I allowed myself to wallow in self pity for a couple of hours. I must say it was less wallow-y than my usual. Since I quit my negative self talk for the most part, I didn’t have much to wallow about. So I sat in my birding chair and stared numbly into the distance.
I felt all rumpled, like this dove.
The biggest challenge right now, other than the power outage that has stalled my initial goal of applying for Social Security and unemployment, is figuring out what I want to do next. I wish grooming and petting horses was a viable career path. Or walking through nature and explaining things to people, which is a real job, nature interpretation, but I have the wrong degrees. And I’d have to move, since I live in a desert when it comes to parks.
We can’t all be so lucky like this park Cardinal!
No need to suggest blogging for a living. I tried to monetize this blog and got $100 in a year and a half. That wasn’t worth subjecting readers to ads. I’m not exactly influencer material. That’s fine, by the way!
I’ll just swim along.
Whatever I do, even retirement, I want to help people and be a positive influence in the world. I’ll see what I can volunteer for.
And I’ll look at the nice flowers I got when we arrived home.
In the meantime, I could use a cup of coffee, but the powerful storms have done a number on the power here and it’s still out. Our outdoor cushions have tried to escape again. We weren’t prepared for this and didn’t put them away.
Send your productive working and volunteering ideas my way. I’ll be over here being resilient and working on the next chapter of my autobiography.
PS: power is back and I got coffee in my favorite mug. Off to achieve things.
Have you ever performed on stage or given a speech?
Um. Yes. I probably should have studied acting. I enjoy performing very much, and have since I was a child. I like being someone else, whether doing music or speaking. Most of my speaking has been teaching or training. I enjoy it. Perhaps that’s why I’m a corporate trainer and spent much of my life singing in choruses and harmony groups.
My outgoing persona was out tonight.
Still, I prefer a friendly audience. Usually that’s not an issue. I mostly sang to friends or people I had things in common with, and I just make the people I’m training into a friendly audience with my relentless friendliness. Who IS that woman?
Here I’m orating at the Grand Canyon, or pretending to be
It’s been a lot harder lately for me to get out in public and “perform.” I admit that the reason I’m so “on” at parties is that it’s more like fake performance Suna is there, not real anxiety-ridden Suna.
My friend Debra and I about to launch into holiday songs. Not really. We just dressed similarly.
I succeeded tonight in doing okay at the Master Naturalist holiday party. I was probably overly outgoing, but I had fun taking pictures and being silly. I’d been really nervous beforehand. I think it’s because I haven’t ventured into a group of people who aren’t all close to me since…October I think.
I’d missed friends like Don and Cindy.
But it went well and I was pleased with the fun, good food, and gift swap (I got a cool hand-carved whale!). Whew. I did it. I’m tired now, like any introvert is after mingling, but I feel ok. People were kind to me, too.
Yummy food. The pork was amazing.
You’ve all been very kind after yesterday’s dumping of some of my issues. I do want to say we will have enough land for horse pastures; just not how I’d wanted it. I wasn’t dry clear. Thank you all for caring.
I didn’t look it up, so I’m not sure what the official gift is. But, according to my friends Tarrin and Teddy, the gift is a nice rooster ( as opposed to a mean one).
As-yet unnamed rooster.
The rooster magically appeared on their property, where he tried to fit in, but was chased by cattle, horses, dogs, and the roosters who already live there. He was too nice to just dispose of, so I volunteered to take him, since I still miss Bruce, our previous very nice fellow.
I’m suddenly feeling maternal.
I put him in the roost with Bianca, figuring they’ll sleep together and be more likely to get along. Maybe he will encourage the Cochins Cathy and Cindy to sleep indoors. I hope so, since it’s cooled off and rain is forecast.
More fowl news to come soon, so stay tuned.
In addition to a horse lesson and chicken pickup, I spent a little while with my friends Pamela and Linda Jo, doing a BioBlitz across the road from Pamela, where the landowner intends to clear all the plants to create a pasture. We recorded all we found, including a variety of native trees.
Pecan I think Cedar elmTed oakTexas ashEastern red cedar Gum BumeliaPossumhawCarolina ash ir maybe Texas ashHoney locustCoral berry, not a tree.
We found 78 species, which shows the diversity hiding in our Milam County landscape.
There may be more observations uploaded to our iNaturalist project, which I look forward to. I’m finding a bit more peace being around people who are good friends and love our plants and animals.
Oh I needed today. Words have failed me when I’ve tried to describe what I experienced, but I’ll try to summarize.
San Marcos River
This morning I attended a field session at the location of the former Aquarena Springs tourist attraction, which has been lovingly returned to a more natural state by Texas State University and is now the meadows Center for Water and the Environment. Before it was an attraction, it was a site of a gristmill. Before that, it was a sacred site for native people who believed they were born from the springs.
This is the spot.
I’d met the descendants of this tribe at a conference years ago. They talked about the Sacred Springs and how it had magical qualities. That’s why I wanted to attend the session on Field Environmental Philosophy As An Approach Towards Mindfulness and Reconnection With Freshwater Ecosystems. That’s a mouthful.
Headwaters of the river.
Oh my goodness. The session, which was led by three philosophy professors, was exactly what I needed to put together the seemingly disparate pieces of my spiritual practice, personal philosophy, and scientific interests. It’s biocultural conservation. The techniques the presentation demonstrated show how you can integrate mindfulness and connection with nature and scientific analysis. Bingo. That’s my goal.
Learning and listening
I got a bit overwhelmed just standing at the sacred site. It felt like one of “my” places. I was deeply comforted and quite moved. One of the professors noticed. I said I felt connection, like ley lines. He said that’s because many sensitive people say the same thing! Eureka. I found my Texas home spot at last. (I know of two others, one in Florida and one in Wales.)
Later in the day
I no longer wonder if I shouldn’t be identifying birds while doing my breathing exercises. I feel validated in my drive to perceive the world around me in all the modalities. It’s just a great feeling.
Sunset and cypress
Anyway, we did an observation exercise then came back and talked about it. I think the philosophers were ticked that so many of us were blown away by what they were sharing with us. There were so many great pieces of feedback and questions. I have many reading resources to look up now. I’m stoked.
Glorious old growth trees.
I enjoyed hearing the birds and looking at the beautiful plants on this site, too. The university is doing great work to preserve this area.
The rest of my day was full of fine conversations with new and old friends and even some rest. I met interesting people in the vendor area and learned from them. Fascinating stuff about night sky preservation, fireflies, raptors, and native seeds. Bonus was meeting a woman who’s just published a book on karst and caves in this area, another interest of mine!
The Texas Master Naturalist annual meeting kickoff was back at the springs. I enjoyed the glass-bottom boat tide very much. I’m glad they kept the boats from the tourist days. Here are some fish and turtle photos.
Glass-bottom bowman ride.
After the boat I went into the aquarium area in the building on site. They had examples of all the fish we saw in the river, plus the Texas River Cooter turtles. The garfish were so cool. Plus there was an eel. I love aquariums.
Aquaria
I came on back before the nothing began and joined my friend Mike for a drink. I wish we could see him more often. I caught him up with the rest of our chapter members and he caught me up with his naturalist and ethics work.
I still have time to blog for you! Enjoy this dump of more photos of my day at the aquatic center.
A maple tree!Great EgretGiant black WillieArmy webwormCypress kneesTurtle and fishPrettiest poverty weed everWetland beauty.
I’m tired so this is quick. The two halves of my day differed greatly. In the first half, I spent a few hours at the Wild Wings Bird Sanctuary with Ann. We got some excellent new birds to add to the list of sightings there, and did a bit of Bioblitz action as well.
Look at my giant carpenter bee!
We spent time with Gene and Cindy, who were working at selling chickens until we got to them to talk about wild birds. We went over designs for interesting benches to put out in the seating area to replace some rickety ones.
This is a Leopold bench, named after a famous naturalist who made them for bird watching.
We also talked about a logo. I’d used the AI software they want us to use at work to generate a few ideas. We are going with this one, with different colors.
It should be legible and look good in monochrome.
After all our decisions, I went into Cameron to the annual Steak Stein and Wine event. I got a couple of holiday gifts, which I’m proud of. Such a planner! And I got kettle corn, a snow cone, and later a peach Bellini, frozen. Mm.
As always, I enjoyed the car show. This is a Morris pickup truck conversion. Ooh. Want.
But I also was brave. I supported my friends y volunteering at the booth for the county Democratic Party. Why did I do this, if I’m avoiding politics? Honestly, it’s to let others know we are here and just normal people. We had no candidate signs or pamphlets, just a code you could scan to sign up for the mailing list. Mostly people ignored us or were polite, and we had a few nice conversations. Only after the drinking started did one guy get ugly, and I was gone by then.
I did fine.
I am proud for not totally hiding, to maybe encourage others to not be afraid. You shouldn’t be afraid in this country. I’m still going to respect your opinions if they differ from mine, especially if you’ve thought it out. we need to respect each other!
The event also included giant Dairy Queen treats!
I got to have dinner (the steak part of the festival) with family and workers at our nephew’s business. That means I got to see and talk to my son! And the food was better this year, especially the mashed potatoes.
All in all, it was a good, but long, day. I enjoyed seeing friends and acquaintances and was brave!
It happens all the time to me. I get perturbed about a situation, but if I just give myself time, I can figure out a solution. I need to remember this for future perturbations.
I’ve no idea if I used perturbation right. But here’s a cute Fiery Skipper in a salt marsh aster.
Yesterday I found out my roommate for the upcoming Master Naturalist annual meeting had decided to get a room to herself. Now, as Suna, I would be hypocritical if I didn’t applaud someone who wanted to room alone. Heck, this was the first year I’d wanted a roommate, and I go on long trips alone. I get wanting a place to decompress!
This Dusky Skipper is here to tell you it’s time for the 2024 Texas Pollinator Bioblitz, so there will be many insects and flowering plants in here for the next few days.
The problem was that I’d messed up when registering for my hotel room. Because I wanted to arrive Wednesday, a day the hotel is full, I couldn’t use hotel points and had to reserve a full price. Then I realized I’d forgotten to book Saturday night. So, it was working out to be an expensive mess and I considered canceling, since I’ll have no one to hang out with.
I could hang with this guy. What an interesting wasp. It’s a Five-banded Thynnid wasp, I think.
But I thought, and thought, and at last my brain woke up and gave me the inspiration to contact Hilton customer support. So I got through to their Diamond member customer support. I told the agent my situation and she said she thought she could fix it. It took a while, but she was able to apply points for three of the nights, and get me the less expensive conference rate for that pesky Wednesday night (it’s still over $200—no wonder most of my colleagues aren’t going). To top it off, she exchanged my standard two-queen room for my favorite: the king corner suite. I just couldn’t stop thanking that nice and competent worker. She got a great review from me!
I’m happy as a Phaon Crescent that’s avoided the local Phoebes.
I felt like things took a turn for the better last night when I got a text from Tarrin after I’d already gone to bed. She said to go outside quickly. So I did. There was the aurora borealis dimly shining in the north! It may have been pale, but I’d never seen it before! And it looked really cool in photos.
Wow!
I got all weepy and giddy at the same time. I’d always wanted to see the Northern Lights. Now I don’t have to go to Iceland to do it. Lee enjoyed it, too. I really should have texted others, but I was too awestruck. I’m glad Tarrin texted!
Bucket Lust (Anita said I had to leave this good typo) complete. That was the only thing left on it, now that I’ve also seen the Grand Canyon.
I’d also been sort of pouty that I had no one to do fun things with tomorrow afternoon, but now I do! I’m going to the Wild Wings Bird Sanctuary to do my October bird count and should find friends there, then I’ll go help another group at the yearly Steak Stein and Wine event downtown. I’m glad they asked. I’m a sucker for feeling needed.
I’m also a sucker for gifts of flowers. Lee got me a chrysanthemum a couple of days ago. This, however, is feverfew.
Plus, I get to eat the steak dinner, because a space became available. I was ok not going, but it will be nice to go after all and see my son as a bonus.
Don’t be pouty! A beautiful moment might be coming right up.
The moral of today is to quit being pouty. Things will work out, or a better alternative will arise if you remember to make your own fun!
Today I got a bee in my bonnet to arrange my list of birds seen in Milam County, Texas phylogenetically. That’s how my friend Ann says most birders want to see their bird lists. Here’s the official list, which is all formal and in Latin.
I prefer informal birds, like these guys in the painting by a local artist that I got as a housewarming gift. I’ve seen all three of these, finally.
I’m not making it that complex. I’m using David Sibley’s English interpretation, which is how most of the checklists I’ve seen for state parks are organized. There are lots of variations, as I discovered when I looked all all Ann’s examples.
Here’s one example, which also tells you what season the bird might appear and if it’s unusual.
I just wanted to satisfy my curiosity about how many birds of each order we have. Once I got started, I just couldn’t stop arranging. I kept going until all the birds were arranged. I’m embarrassed to say I spent at least four hours formatting, cutting, pasting and labeling.
Here’s another example. We have lots more birds here, thanks to migratory visitors.
I sure got fixated on my list! I’ll share it when we are finished.
Here’s yet another Scissortail photo. Look at his tail!
All that concentration meant that I was a bit late getting to the horses, so I got rained on. Yes! Rain! At least it cooled down a bit. I’m not enjoying the fact that our two moderate weather weeks are over.
The heat this morning made bird watching hard. This is my best attempt at a bluebird photo.
I did find a couple of interesting plants today. I was particularly happy to find gomphrena weed on the roadside, because I didn’t know it grew here. I’d seen it before while camping. And I just thought the goldenrod was graceful.
The Hermits' Rest 