spirituality – Page 2 – The Hermits' Rest

Well Dang

Trying to stay on an even keel these days is a challenge, isn’t it? No need to name all the reasons why, because you know the ones that affect us all, and we each have our own personal stresses, grief, and challenges.

Today was one of those days when the dam burst and I felt all the feelings. I needed to feel them so I could regroup. The Buddha reminds us that life is suffering, but he also shared ways to cope, grow, learn, and move on.

That’s what I’m reminding myself of today, as I processed warmongers, school shootings, friends’ loss of parents, and frightening political climate.

Trite but true: all things must pass.

Like these bluebirds and brown birds, I feel like. I don’t know which way to go, so I teeter in the middle.

Book Report: Gaian Tarot

I haven’t been buying many tarot decks in the past few years. I’ve been happy with my favorite old friends, mostly Robin Wood. But last month I was intrigued by a deck my tarot friend Cat Dancing was using. I liked the nature images on the cards and the artistry of Joanna Powell Colbert, the author of The Gaian Tarot: Healing the Earth, Healing Ourselves (2nd edition, 2025).

I’d heard of Colbert before, as she’s well known in the community, and I knew she was well respected, but I never got around to getting the earlier edition of this deck and book. I’m glad I was encouraged to do so!

I always like it when the book accompanying a deck has original insights and explanations of why each card depicts its components, and Colbert doesn’t disappoint. She weaves her nature themes skillfully through the traditional Fool’s Journey, court, and pip cards, creating a deck you can easily read from but gain new insights as well. I’m not finished reading all the text for each card, but appreciate that she gives a description, a positive and negative interpretation, and helpful keywords for each card. Her perspective is wise and novel enough to make me think differently about familiar archetypes.

This archetype of transformation showed up today, a roseate skimmer

I admit that any deck with salmon of knowledge and holy wells in it makes me happy. That’s my little Cups suit bias. I realize this makes no sense to most readers. Indulge me.

So this evening I spent some time breaking in the cards, which have lovely gold edges. They are somewhat less stiff now. Then, because I’m having some difficulty dealing with some interpersonal challenges, I did a simple three-card reading.

The past was 5 of Air (swords). Here eagles are squabbling, birds and sky representing air. There is some squabbling going on around me, and it feels like some parties have their talons out. I was glad to see this in the past—maybe it will settle down soon.

The present was the 4 of Earth (pentacles) with squirrels gathering up nuts for the winter. I like Colbert’s interpretation of this card as meaning to gather resources for the future, rather than the greed and miserliness Robin Wood depicts, which I always thought was more the dark side of the card. Anyway, right now I am actually saving up for the future with this short-term job. I’m reminded not to let myself get drawn into work drama. I’m there to help out and give myself a nest egg. But I’ll remember to share!

The future card is the 10 of Water (cups). Here we have the salmon! The Gaian card depicts their lifecycle, ending with their return home to die. Here I prefer Wood’s happy family gathered together. But both are about gathering at home, a completion of a cycle, and a happy one at that. I’m not sure what this portends for my future, though I have been thinking about how I have all I need now, and that I’m happy with those close to me—nice to think it will continue after the squabbling and saving.

Wake up or the archetypal vultures of decay will get you! No snoozing at my tarot babble!

Ha. I used to blog my tarot readings all the time. It’s been so long most readers are probably shaking their heads. Maybe I’ll do a card of the day again for a while, as I get used to this deck.

Or I’ll just gaze at clouds and see what I can gather from them.

Remember, you all, I use tarot to help me see things in a different light, to reach into areas I might be inattentive to, and to keep me centered. It’s a tool. Use the tools that work for you as we navigate these unprecedented times.

Vibes, Prayers, and Intent

Two dear friends had surgery today. These women have given me great support, encouragement, and caring in the many years I’ve known them. They are two of the most thoughtful and loving people I’ve ever met, so naturally they were in my thoughts today.

I told my husband how relieved I was when I heard they were both home and starting the next phases of recovery. He probably thinks I’m a bit bonkers for caring about so many of my old colleagues from the nonprofit years, but we went through so much together. I owe them my loyalty as so many have been so good to me.

The way I thought about my friends all day made me muse about how handy it would be if I had some sky dude to pray to. But even when I tried to pray as a child, I always thought God would get more of a feeling than my laundry list of specific entreaties. Nonetheless I find myself doing my pagan Buddhist version of sending out Lovingkindness aimed toward the West Coast of North America, where my friends are. I just feel it in my bones that positive intent has an effect on us.

No doubt humans have an instinctual drive to try to make things better for friends and family. And for all I know the vibes I send out may help. They help me, at least, to feel connected. I’ve heard that people recover better when they know others are cheering them on, but I’m not sure. I can hope!

Perhaps if folks spent more time sending positive energy and good intent out and less time blaming others for sickness, natural disasters, and all that, we’d start to think and behave differently. To make the world better takes more than thoughts and prayers, of course, but if it leads to action, maybe humanity could slow the downward spiral we and our planet are in.

I’m off to beam out healing vibes now. Good night.

Mushrooms and sun, we had a break from rain.

Honest, I’m Fine

Whenever I start to go in and on about my pessimism it makes certain beloved relatives worried. When I realized that this afternoon I began to muse about how okay I’m actually doing right now. I guess if things have to get scary for those of us not in power, now is preferable to even a few years ago, for me. Spiritual growth is a big help.

Lee says a giant porch chair is a big help.

It’s taken a long time to get to where I don’t panic and start feeling paranoid. Even if “they” were out to get me, it wouldn’t hangs who I am or how I act. Like a friend mentioned in response to yesterday’s post, I’m going to choose to be kind. I’m also not going to give up my ethics and morals. Not panicking doesn’t mean not doing the right thing.

By the way, porch furniture came mere minutes after my son finished the beautiful trim work. He did so well.

(Aside: more than one person I know called their representative today and talked to a real person.)

Look at that fine detail. Craftsmanship!

Anyway, I’m coping well, my anxiety only pops up occasionally, and I’m enjoying my little hermit life. I’m staying in my lane, not asking questions of anyone who’s not wanting to share with me, and enjoying the heck out of my tiny circle of friends and loved ones, dogs, horses, and fowl. That, and birds, is enough to create a peaceful oasis.

This excellent hammertail robberfly was my nature fun of the day.

Please remind me of my peace when I start whining about being lonely, left out, or missing old friends. It does happen. Those I care about are in my heart! That has to be enough.

And all of you who read and comment and share your stories with me are also in my heart. Thank you for showing all of us how much good and caring for others there still is in the world.

Three Significant Books

List three books that have had an impact on you. Why?

I have chosen three books (I actually discuss five, but one is a runner-up and two are related) that shaped me in that magical period when I was transitioning into an adult and my capacity for intellectual growth was at its peak. Each book was written when I was testing limits, making poor decisions I search of good decisions, and preparing to emerge a more rational and stable human. I’m grateful to have learned from these authors.

Metaphors We Live By

This book is by George Lakoff and Mark Johnson, two important scholars in pragmatics, the field I studied in graduate school. The thesis of the book is this:

The book suggests metaphor is a tool that enables people to use what they know about their direct physical and social experiences to understand more abstract things like work, time, mental activity and feelings. Wikipedia

My thinking about how society works, how media persuades audiences to, and how politicians manipulate the public have all been deeply affected by the ideas in this book.

My favorite example is the pervasiveness of the war metaphor. It’s one reason I can’t stand the phrase, “shoot me an email.” Business communication is just crawling with war terminology. Business is war. Politics is war. Love is a battlefield. This book was the impetus for me being me.

I recommend George Lakoff’s other works, as well. Once you start to see metaphors embedded in the language around you, you can’t forget it.

The Color Purple

I’m guessing most of you have been exposed to this work, originally a 1982 book by Alice Walker, in one form or another. I read it when it first came out, having read no reviews and knowing nothing about the author. This means my experience of The Color Purple wasn’t influenced by any preconceptions.

I was 24 when I read it. I’d never read an epistolary novel before, so I was charmed by the letter-writing format and how clearly the writer’s voice came through in each letter. I was also still fairly naive about how horrible humans can be to each other. The resilience and bravery the characters in the book affected me deeply.

The Color Purple told me that I, too, could survive and thrive in a world that threw many challenges at me. The characters have never left me and I’m not sure why.

I did love the film with Oprah Winfree in it. I just experienced it differently and got additional insights into the strength it takes to be your authentic self. I haven’t seen any other version and I’m okay with that. This is my favorite novel.

Runner Up: The Handmaid’s Tale, by Margaret Atwood (1985). I can’t bring myself to watch the television series. This book was too prescient.

The Woman’s Encyclopedia of Myths and Secrets and The Skeptical Feminist

These are two books by Barbara G. Walker, also a prominent knitting writer of this time period. Both came out in the mid-1980s. These books introduced me to the idea of the maiden, mother, and crone archetypes.

The encyclopedia was my first introduction to feminist theology, and though it suffered from the same issues as many early neopagan writing (interpreting historical references and artifacts to support a mythical matriarchal past world, etc.), it still taught me enough to get me started on a lifetime of spiritual exploration. I can still remember sitting in my bedroom in Urbana, Illinois devouring this book when I should have been dissertating.

The Skeptical Feminist may not be in print anymore, but it reassured me that my weird philosophical leanings since childhood weren’t signs of insanity—I just didn’t have the words and concepts to explain my vague yearnings to be one with nature. It also reassured me that I don’t have to “believe in” some deity to apply archetypes and metaphors (them again) as I forge my own beliefs. Whew.

I use this information today as I draw from the wisdom of Jesus without identifying as Christian and take comfort in Buddhist ideas without adhering strictly to any form. It’s so helpful in these times.

What’s the Hurry?

Today I was feeling quite fine, perhaps even groovy, while I was on my walk around Nails Creek State Park on an uncharacteristically cool April morning. I was reminded of the Simon and Garfunkel song that reminds us:

Slow down, you move too fast!
You’ve got to make the morning last!

That was from “Feeling Groovy,” if you aren’t old enough to have it pop right into your head. That’s how I was, too, taking my time, feeling the sand beneath my hiking shoes, and in the groove.

Life, I love you. All is groovy!

Groovy soapberry flowers

While I was walking and walking (fast enough to keep warm but not very fast), I realized that when I walk rhythmically I can’t think about anything negative. I just feel my body moving. Maybe that’s why people like running so much?

One thing I’m glad about is that I don’t need to run to get the effects of exercise. I love moving more slowly. I also think my focus on perceiving my surroundings with all my senses helps with grounding me. It’s like a walking meditation! That’s it! I’ve learned to meditate while looking for plants and listening for birds.

Even if that’s not true I find the idea comforting. Hobbies can be healthy! I plan to control my meanderings and take my time exploring the wide world around me, slowly and intentionally. It may be what keeps me together through unprecedented challenges.

I spent my original groovy years surrounded by Spanish moss.

What do you think? Am I onto something?

Nature Church

I’m easily excited, I guess. When I see a new or unexpected plant, bird, or insect, I get a thrill in my heart. I smile in the middle of nowhere, all by myself. Yesterday was full of such moments. The only thing that could have improved it would be to have had a companion also iNatting and Merlining with me. I made those verbs up. It’s good to have a companion in your spiritual experiences occasionally.

On my first walk yesterday here at the Nails Creek Unit of Lake Somerville State Park, I took the Overlook Trail, after revisiting the Lake Trail, where all the White Pelicans, Great Egrets, Great Blue Herons, Forster’s Terns, Northern Shovelers (charmingly shoveling away), Blue- and Green-winged Teals, and mystery sandpipers were in full force.

Forster’s Tern. Lee took the next few photos.

The Overlook Trail was breathtaking in its subtle way. First, it smelled wonderful, thanks to the blooming trees. There were Honey Locust, Honey Mesquite, Eve’s Necklacepod, and a lot of yaupon. That stuff smells so good.

Every turn I took revealed new vistas or secluded nooks. I realized that I felt spiritually a-tingle, like I was in a religious service and being moved. Mother Nature’s church was what my soul needed.

I enjoyed the viewing platform and all the lake views, though the little plants also enchanted me. I couldn’t have felt better. No news, no noise, no distractions.

Next we took an exciting trip to the grocery store in Somerville. This yard where someone planted a LOT of wildflowers was a highlight.

In the late afternoon it wasn’t too hot, so I went on the Cedar Creek Trail. It goes into the middle of the park, through beautiful post oak Savannah. The prairie parts were covered by wildflowers that like sandy soil, a few of which were new to me. The photos don’t do the scenery justice, plus all those little pointed phlox smelled better than perfume. I was often stopped in my tracks by the views. Wow.

I realize this isn’t the Grand Canyon or Rocky Mountains, but to me this part of Texas is incredibly beautiful. I hope you enjoyed the photos.

I Can Do Whatever I Want

It feels that way, right now, even though I don’t want to do things that cost money (if a recession comes, blame me, because this consumer has stopped spending on anything not horse related).

He’s not too expensive. Just some fungal spray.

All right, then, why do I feel so free? It’s obvious! There’s no pesky job eating up my time. That feels very freeing. I’m liberated, from a scheduling point of view.

She’s free as a bird, or in this case, a turkey with her favorite water bucket and some chickweed.

For example, I had a dental checkup today. Once I got the gas pump to work at the old Cefco station (second time in a row there that I’ve had problems), I made it on time, zipped in, and 40 minutes of cheerful conversation and scraping later, I was free to explore my old stomping grounds in the vortex between Cedar Park and Round Rock, Texas.

Google maps provided this photo of the actual round rock in Round Rock, which was part of the Chisholm Trail.

First I went to the grocery store, the fancy H-E-B where our problem ward Edie used to work. At least I’m over my terror of that place. I had so much fun. Clearly, I’ve not been getting out much lately when seeing the vast offerings of a US grocery store is exciting. I got a lunch sandwich, some rice and couscous side dishes, and hair accessories I’ve been needing for months. It felt weird to spend money. I’m getting the hang of my new frugal lifestyle.

Carlton points out that while he is not free, he’s pretty inexpensive.

I took my lunch over to Brushy Creek Lake Park, a place I used to go pretty often before it was fancy. Brushy Creek is beautiful in this part of Williamson County, and I thought it would be fun to see what’s living around there. Why not? I didn’t have anywhere else I needed to be!

The lake is still nice and had some shore birds and even white ducks, domesticated I guess. I found many familiar plants that grow in limestone karst areas, and of course, bluebonnets.

One warning, the wooded areas near the lake are covered with very healthy poison ivy!

But there are also fun water plants and friendlier vines to enjoy.

Smilax rotundifolia or Round leaf greenbrier

I ended up hearing or seeing 45 birds there, which is challenging considering I spent much of my time next to or under Parmer Lane, with its many lanes of traffic.

There were many American and Lesser Goldfinches, the usual Great-tailed Grackles of the greater Austin metro area, and plenty of titmice and sparrows.

The biggest highlight for me was hearing two Cooper’s Hawks communicating then seeing one swoop down into a tree right next to me. I couldn’t get a really clear shot, but I was nice and close!

On my way out, I checked to see if the labyrinth was still there. It was, and appears to be maintained at least some.

After I said a silent word of gratitude, I turned to leave. I’d noticed some of the matting under the gravel was showing, making it look like garden hoses, or something.

I realized one of the hose-like items was shinier than the others. It was a pretty rat snake sunning itself on the rocks. I enjoyed looking at it for a while. I felt like it was my gift for checking on the labyrinth.

On my way home, I drove along the creek to downtown Round Rock. I passed the rock. I was sad to see more new houses, but glad to see at least some of the beautiful wooded areas still thriving. It’s a wonderful bike or hiking trail.

My hiking was to the left. My old house was somewhere near the word “Google.”

There was plenty of time when I got home to hang out with the family and try to clean up Apache. He took so long I didn’t even try to de-mud any others. Mabel has the huge mud balls on her mane again, sigh.

I was glad to see Apache still doing fine, other than a bit sensitive around his face. Funny thing. I raised up his jump as Tarrin suggested. Apache zoomed towards it, then saw it was higher. He put on his brakes and slid in the muddy ground to stop. I’ll have to work on that!

Indicating they’d like to be left alone.

I wonder what crazy stuff I’ll do tomorrow? Whatever I want!

What’s Important Is Learning the Lesson

This morning I saw that someone I know was rereading a book that meant a lot to them. Curious, I looked the book up, and immediately thought from the description that it was about a concept Lee always stresses to me from his reading of Stoicism and that I got hammered into me during my Brené Brown phase. It’s a good thing to learn, and I’m sure I have talked about it in my blogging, too. It’s a variation on the idea that we should focus on what we can control and not let what’s outside our control get to us.

The beautiful sunset colors were in the east tonight. Out of my control.

I was happy to know that someone I care about is working on similar lessons to what I focus on, and was about to move on when I started looking at what people said about the book and its author. There were criticisms of the author’s tone, credentials, and perceived lack of substance in their writing. People also got rather ticked off that the ideas in their writing book weren’t new, and might even boil down to common sense or emotional maturity. My goodness!

I was reminded of another lesson I’ve learned, which is that insecure people like to tear others down to build themselves up. Why put this author down? Jealousy that they’re making money off of it? That they are better marketers and social media strategists? That’s not a great way to expend your valuable energy.

Penney would like you to stop and notice your surroundings.

As I’ve always tried to remember, we’re all on our own spiritual, emotional, and intellectual paths. Maybe we weren’t ready to learn the idea from the Stoics. Maybe we didn’t like Brené Brown’s writing style. Maybe, however, when this book was being promoted was the right time for the person I know, they liked the author’s style and background, and they soaked in some knowledge to make life more enjoyable. That’s a win.

Learning our lessons in life is what counts, not whether the source isn’t the same as someone else’s. Ideas are tweaked and refined constantly, and often many folks have similar ideas. I e heard that there’s nothing new under the sun. I know I’ve shared some “brilliant” thoughts that weren’t news to many readers. If they helped me or another reader have a better life, though, it was worth mentioning!

My attempt at photography of purple henbit flowers failed. So I learned from it!

Whew. Time to dismount from that high horse. Just keep learning, friends, and take the ideas that resonate with you to heart and leave the other ideas aside for someone else. It’s fine.

In personal news, I got a brilliant idea to allow people to have paid subscriptions to my Substack writing. I even got a paid follower! Make that two! Anything I get will help in my unexpected low income phase. Knowing me I’ll use it to support other writers.

Lots of the content there is similar to here, though the Substack will have less daily life chitchat and more additional content. Feel free to follow me there or not. I like you blog subscribers right here on WordPress (fans according to Barbara) and won’t be putting ads back on here. They were extra yucky.

Doing Something about It

The Universe has spoken. I’m on the right path for right now, and I’m reaping the rewards. Now I need to be an example for others. I’ll explain.

But first, look, I made a thing. It’s a small bag to hang on a hook next to where I sit in the RV. It will hold my nail file, pencils, and scissors. Not having an end table is a pain.*

I’m feeling somewhat better now that I can be outside more. I was even able to work in the porch today. No wonder I was able to hear 50 birds today.

My view was these two cows. One was not feeling well and the other stayed with her, licking her until they napped.

And more horse time has also helped. Lee put out more hay today, and while everyone else wanted to get into the hay, Dusty just hung around with me and let me remove burs. So when Lee was done, I gave Dusty a bonus meal and a grooming session. That helped, because he’s shedding even more than Apache. We even took a nice walk around the obstacles. He liked that. Much hugging was involved.

He’s looking good for his advanced age, just thin.

After I was finished working I fed everyone and took Apache out on a ride. He’s getting so much better at home. We had fun, and he genuinely seemed to enjoy hanging out with me. More hugging occurred.

I ended up taking lots of horse and donkey photos after trying to de-bur Fiona. I only got partway through. My hands hurt.

I know all those bird observing and horse hugging is good, because I went to a tarot group meeting this evening on Zoom. I appreciated the invitation, because I’d been wanting to get back to more readings, but didn’t want to get a scary one all alone. We did a five-card spread and each did our own analysis.

It may look depressing, but it made sense.

I won’t go into what each position was for, since the spread was just for this group. The gist of my interpretation is that I’m one broken-hearted wise woman who needs to turn away from what makes her sad and go meditate or whatever. As usual, the cards back up what I’m trying to do! The Emperor tells me I’m on a path of leadership, and that’s a nudge to go be a good example more. I’ll heed that advice and go do something: be a more vocal proponent of peace and universal love.

Anyway, that was a different and fun day!

*there is no pattern for this. It’s got a single crochet base and double crochet sides using two strands of Dishie cotton yarn. I seamed the center with slip stitches and added a handle 5 stitches wide. I put this here because I know people always want patterns, but this was just a utilitarian object.