Ranch Life – Page 31 – The Hermits' Rest

The Freedom to Flee

If you won two free plane tickets, where would you go?

Honestly, I have no idea where I’d go if I won two free plane tickets. I’d probably be pragmatic and use it to fly to Hilton Head in November, first class.

This is what you get when you ask AI to make a picture of plane tickets to Hilton Head. That gave me a laugh.

Also, honestly, today I got so frustrated with my moods, my isolation (sometimes a hermit doesn’t feel so hermit-like and needs someone), and my lack of options that I seriously considered booking a hotel room in Austin and hiding there all weekend watching the Olympics.

I got over myself and decided not to waste my Hilton Honors points on that. Better to stay where I am and deal with things. And I did. So there. I’m still a little short-tempered, which is how I get when the anxiety attacks attack.

These are not the kind of mushrooms that help with PTSD, but we have a lot of them after all the rain.

And thanks to making good decisions, I got to experience the relief of getting a new ($$$) swimming pool pump. Yes, the original one in our pool has already kicked the bucket. It was making so much noise that it was no fun sitting outside in the nice weather and I couldn’t hear birds very well.

Lee and I got to sit by the pool and enjoy the silence this evening. That was healing silence. Maybe knowing I am free to flee if I need to makes me happy to just stay where I am.

Bee happy! Finally I got a GOOD bumblebee in a morning glory!

Tomorrow, gotta move some hay I didn’t move quickly enough. Then I’ll need to dry it out before storing it! Horses will enjoy this delicious hay grown right next door!

Tricky Health and Well Being Strategies

What strategies do you use to maintain your health and well-being?

I’ll tell you about one health and well-being strategy I use: if my day was too draining to blog about, I’ll put off answering the prompt. So, I started this yesterday and stopped. I realized I was having anxiety issues big time.

I don’t think I realized it as the work day was going on, but when I stopped working, I got those familiar chest pains that usually don’t happen anymore thanks to my daily medication. It’s some kind of PTSD-like response to my day. My boss was laid off and I was the last to know, thanks to Microsoft Teams suddenly insisting on my password that I forgot. That kind of stuff happens in large corporations of course. I’ve been through it with Lee, at the same company.

But my “stress memory” didn’t handle it as well as my intellectual brain did. I went right back to when I was at my previous employer and the boss I considered a mentor and friend got laid off (victim of a power struggle). I’d really liked my job there, for the most part, but things immediately went downhill until I realized I, too, was in the middle of a power struggle I could not win.

My nice job became prickly, just like these beautiful flowers will become those giant burs.

The last straw was when they made someone who worked for me my boss, and a week after telling me I was the strongest member of the team, he turned around and gave me one of “those” little chats about what a poor worker I was. I was so confused I kept asking, “What?” The very lucky thing was that I’d been getting all sorts of calls and emails about another position doing the parts of my job I really liked without the management politics. I took it. It’s a great job.

Happy worker, generated by AI – it is not me

And here I am having chest pains again. Now, I know that my position for next year has passed all the approvals needed, and I’ll get to work only 32 hours, which I find great. More time for camping and horses! But, not knowing where our team is going and all that would make anyone a little uncomfortable. I need to just take it day by day and be positive.

Could you tell my emotions to pay attention to my logical side? I guess that’s really my job. And that’s one thing I do to keep my well-being under control. I keep telling myself everything is OK until I believe it. It’s worked for eliminating negative self-talk, so maybe it will work with getting triggered when a bad experience could be construed to be happening again.

I need a new perspective, like this picture of the front pond from the side I usually don’t see.

At least maintaining my health is easier. I now exercise enough because it’s become a habit (hooray for my Apple Watch). I can’t believe it, but I feel bad if I’m not active. Needing to care for the animals sorta forces me to burn some calories, and the horse lessons are good for both my body and my mind. I’m really feeling good about all that!

I comfort her; she comforts me. It all works out.
(It thundered again today, so Goldie begged me to go upstairs and hang out with her.)

Enjoy the Present but Plan for the Future

What are your future travel plans?

Oh yes. I’m traveling in the future. It’s what I promised myself to do while I still can.

Here I am, traveling down the county road in the rain. Does that count?

But first I need to enjoy the present. Indeed, I enjoyed today very much. Who doesn’t enjoy a July day in Texas when it rains and doesn’t get above 90°? I admit to sitting on the porch and watching the rain after work. That felt great.

Other than muddy horses I have no complaints at all. They are pretty happy with the grass not being so straw-like, too.

And the dogs had fun outside. Carlton decided grass runners I’d pulled up were toys and tossed them around gleefully. Unfortunately Alfred decided the extra-dead armadillo was a toy and rolled in it. Oh that smells bad. The armadillo carcass is now unavailable to dogs.

Enjoy a happy live armadillo who lives nowhere near me. Source: free WordPress photo library

As for travel, we have camping trips, two condo stays, and a cabin rental coming up, in addition to the Master Naturalist conference. I’ll share more information as the trips take place.

And I’ll have to cancel some if we don’t have caretakers for the ranch. That (and security) is why I don’t share travel plans here. Things tend to change with no warning around here with so many folks in fragile health and such!

All is well. I’m just going to enjoy each day as much as I can without counting on any future plans coming to fruition until it’s time to go! That’s being flexible and embracing change, all right. Right?

Things Fall Down

Only two things fell down today. Both mattered to me, though!

If the overflow is overflowing, that means the pond is full again!

Yes, rain was the second thing that fell down. Lots of it. It’s like Mother Nature is trying to make up for last year’s endless string of dry 100°+ days. The forecast is for more rain, which should cheer up the frogs. Just this morning the frog pond was completely dry.

That pond doesn’t have multiple sources draining into it like the front one does, so it’s harder to fill. I’m glad the hard rain waited until the bulldozer was finished in the creek bottom. I checked both lower ponds (tanks) today and they look so good. The rain will start new growth on the bare ground.

When it started raining, it really rained. I ignored the fact that four dogs were in my office breathing hard and shaking as long as I could, but they sure looked pitiful.

When the satellite connection went down I told them we could go upstairs and they all ran by me to get up. It was so noisy startled Lilia, who cleans the house, as she was cleaning the bathroom. I said I had to protect them. So, I read a magazine while Goldie shook next to me, Penney tried to crawl inside me, and everyone else hid under the bed. Thunder is hard on dogs.

Goldie is back in bed now, but just to sleep.

So, I said rain was the second thing to fall. The first was me. I did what I knew I’d eventually do, and I stepped in a dog hole. You see, they did little holes then the super-spreading coastal Bermuda grass leftover from when the yard was a pasture grows over them. Once the grass is mowed, it looks all smooth. But no, there are hidden holes.

Looks like smooth lawn. Is full of jokes, poop, and dead things (just one currently)

And I was in a hurry to empty the rain gauge of yesterday’s rainfall before today’s rain began. I walked fast. Big mistake. Down I went. Luckily I only slightly twisted my ankle and wrenched my back. I’d have fallen better, but I had my phone in one hand and my computer glasses in the other and didn’t want to break them. So my wrists are paying the price.

My wrist looks good, though, with my upgraded watch on it (the other one was getting wonky after many years of faithful service).

I didn’t even tell my friends today, because another one of them had a much scarier fall, making me feel grateful I wasn’t slipping in the bathroom. I’m also grateful my friend recovered miraculously and no worse for wear. I’m barely hurt.

Back to the rain, the creek has been rising since this afternoon. It’s supposed to keep raining the rest of the week, so who knows how high it will get or if I’ll get to ride horses again anytime soon. They’re probably all right with that, as well as with the cooler weather.

Rain annoys fire ants and they make these weird lines.

Who’d have guessed we’d have a rainy week in July when there isn’t even a hurricane!

This gal is ready to see what washes up.

Have a Good Evening, Readers

Today was just fine. Not too hot, had some rain, horses were well behaved, and I saw lots of plants.

Heck, even Mr and Mrs Bluebird of Happiness visited.

Lee and I watched golf on television, because it relaxes me but does have exhibitions of skill. Then we watched the news a while. Then I was outside enjoying the cool-ish weather until time to make a meal with a lot of mushrooms in it. I guess yesterday’s food post made me crave umami.

Note: I’m thankful for my husband and a couple of friends who were there for me today! Good folks.

That’s all I have for public consumption. Sleep well, everyone.

Taking Comfort, Making Plans

What’s your go-to comfort food?

Hmm. Lately no food comforts me much. But I’d say I usually reach for something cheesy. These days it’s either those little red laughing cow rounds or cottage cheese (preferably full fat, large curd). Full fat yogurt with good fruit, like Noosa, also works. Creaminess seems to be a key. Naturally, creamy ole ice cream also does the trick. I guess I help finance the dairy industry.

Cheese. I like it (also bread—I can eat wheat and dairy just fine, being all European.

My anxiety has ticked down a notch, which I can tell because I’ve allowed myself to plan for the future (other than camping and condos; I do plan that). But today I figured out what I’d like to do with my volunteer time. Well, in addition to endless flower and insect photos.

I visited the new bird observation way station thing that’s been started by our Master Naturalist group today. I’m very impressed by how hard Gene at the Bird and Bee Farm has been working on it. He’s even obtained outside funding that is helping with fencing and future mulching.

My friend Ann is the mastermind behind the project, but she can’t do most of the heavy work. She is the expert on birds, though.

I sat on a log out there for a long time and watched a little Downy Woodpecker digging a hole, maybe for a nest. Then I watched dung beetles rolling some poop quite industriously. I realized that this was A Good Place and that I’d like to help.

So, I told Ann I’d be the chronicler of the project. I’ll take pictures and record the bird species seen and heard there. I can blog about it on the Master Naturalist blog, too. I’m feeling brave for making a plan.

Logs mark the boundaries. They’ve already run water out here, too!

It will be a great reason to be outdoors in peace and quiet while contributing to something positive. And maybe I can take some cheese out there and have a comforting picnic.

Bonus piece of oddness. There’s a crawfish in our pool. It’s just going around eating stuff.

Do You Need a Bird Book?

If so, I recommend The Sibley Guide to Birds, Second Edition. It’s by David Allen Sibley. Not a surprise. I mentioned earlier this week that I read it from cover to cover (literally, since the covers and end pages are also interesting).

Sibley is an incredibly talented illustrator and I have found his detailed photos of similar birds like sparrows and warblers very helpful. His descriptions of birds and their calls are quite accurate but also funny at times. I love how he tries to write out what a bird song sounds like, then calls them dull or wheezing or whatever.

The maps are also helpful in trying to see if a bird is likely to be seen or heard where you are. I found a few to look out for here!

It’s a bigger book than many bird guides, so it would be hard to carry around in the field, but I like to really be able to see the images. I carry Merlin Bird ID with me when I’m out. This book is for more detail.

Look! Flickers! They are woodpeckers, you know.

I loved this book while reading it and will refer to it often. It’s a great addition to any nature library.

By the way, we got some reasonable rain. I love how this Eastern Pondhawk glistens against the wet leaves.

Next up? Animal tracks! I do already know dig, horse, chicken, and deer.

People Bother Me So Let’s Talk about Weird Stuff

What bothers you and why?

Right now, people bother me. Sometimes the isolation out here in a sparsely populated rural area gets to me, and sometimes I’m glad I’m not around fellow humans too much. I’m so iffy on this! Humans both fascinate and repulse me. I find individuals fascinating and groups (political parties, religious denominations, single-focus nonprofits) frightening the more I get to know them. That bothers me.

What else bothers me? Inexplicable behaviors of non-human living beings, like today’s puzzling behavior involving bees and birds.

[Some of this I also posted elsewhere, but I’ve changed it a bit.]

First, bees. For the past week or two I’d been noticing a lot of honeybees around my legs. It seemed like the earth was buzzing. Upon closer examination, I saw dozens of bees crawling on the tiny blossoms of the grass (I think it’s Dallis grass) that is blooming now. The bees were all very busy, zipping from flower to flower (not leisurely sipping as they usually do), and they were loaded with pollen.

This went on for a few days. Yesterday, there was no buzzing as I walked along the field in my daily bird-watching patrol. Then, late in the afternoon I was over by the trees listening to a Yellow-billed Cuckoo when I heard something that sounded like one of those annoying drones people fly these days. I looked up and didn’t see a drone. I saw a large mass of tiny things moving along at a rapid clip. It was hundreds and hundreds of bees swarming. I guess they were moving on to better pastures. I’m not sure where their hive was before, because I hadn’t heard one in a couple of years. I hope they find a nice new dead tree!

Did you know bees swarm in giant balls o’ bees? No, they do not. This FAKE image is what WordPress AI gave me when I asked for a swarm of flying bees. Sophisticated it is not.

Moving along, I’ve also been dealing with birds overhead, specifically the beautiful but omnipresent Barn Swallows. Now, normally they hang out on our porches, building mud nests, raising babies and pooping. They also eat numerous insects, so they get to stay (also it’s ILLEGAL to mess with a nest of wild birds; you can ask Mike Mitchell about it if you don’t believe me). We coexist just fine, looking into or out of the windows at each other, and enjoying the swimming pool area.

However, lately, the little darlings have not been at all happy with me. They aren’t nesting anymore, just flying around the ponds and in the air catching food. They are always there, and for some reason they resent my presence. When I go for my morning or afternoon walks, I often hear a very loud CHIRP, with a Doppler effect as the chirper moves away. The swallows ambush me from behind, for the most part, but occasionally they fly right at me and veer off just before they make contact with my head.

They are fast little guys.

I have absolutely no clue as to why they are dive-bombing me. I’ve had Mockingbirds and Red-winged Blackbirds do this when they are nesting nearby. But, hey, do they think I want to home in on their mosquitos?

Bwa-ha-ha. This is AI’s best attempt at “giant mosquito.” One big eye and antennae on the side of its head. Well, that was a fun experiment.

All the other animals and plants are absolutely not bothering me. I enjoyed seeking out small flashes of peace and beauty around the property today. This stuff is literally saving me, y’all. If things go to hell in a hand basket, at least I’ll be able to enjoy wherever we end up!

But things will be fine. Humans, bothersome as they are, seem quite resilient.

Relaxing

We didn’t get any rain today, but we got nice clouds, and the high temperature barely got into the 90s.

That enabled me to accomplish many mundane outdoor tasks like weeding and setting up the pool furniture, work with Drew (sadly, Apache has a sore foot AGAIN*), and relax.

After a good day’s work and all those chores, I went for a nice swim for more exercise. The water feels great now that we figured out that the pool heater was somehow turned on and it’s back to normal! I got in my beloved pool float and just drifted around in the cool breeze. I felt like a happy wet noodle.

No photos of me floating, so here’s this morning’s Great Egret in the pond.

To demonstrate how relaxed I was: after I got out I sat in my chair by the woods to listen to birds. It was just perfect, so chill that when I heard a rustling noise I just looked down and enjoyed watching a shiny coach whip snake go on its way along the fence.

It stopped at the gate and paused, looking at me with its bright eyes, then headed on its way. It just said, “Hey, snake.”

Amazing what a little break in the weather can do for you.

*his foot is sore from getting some stuff trimmed that exposed bruising from his previous episode. Tarrin told me how to treat it, and he’s better today.

The Good Stuff: Equine Edition Plus

A little wiped out so I can’t write something long about comfort. So I’ll be brief but positive! This blog needs that, don’t you think?

I’m just pleased as punch to be able to announce that I’m in the best relationship yet with both my horses. That’s taken a lot of work and patience, but sure feels good. I’m glad my trainer works hard and is patient, too (plus she cares).

These are her filly and new calf. They have become playmates. It is extra cute.

It’s become a true pleasure to work with Apache. Funny story: I asked Tarrin if maybe something was wrong with him, because he’s been acting so laid back and agreeable. She laughed and said maybe I’m meeting my horse for the first time. He finally feels good and is showing his friendly and fun personality all the time, and he’s calm. We’ve both come a long way in that department. Dang, it’s fun to get better together.

I don’t have a photo of him today, so here are two more friends. They are good to each other.

And Drew is back to the horse I enjoyed so much before. Whatever he was angry about has passed, and he seems to feel better, too. I guess his shots are helping. I’m enjoying him rather than just working with him because I’m supposed to. I guess we figured things out.

Me riding Drew wherever I ask him to go. It was fun.

The good stuff plus today was that I managed to actually bring myself to reach out to someone about how bad I’ve been feeling lately. She listened, came up with ideas, and made some plans. It just felt good to explain how I feel and be listened to. That’s all I needed.

I’m going to have to find something fun to do this weekend, because we aren’t going camping as planned. The bedroom slide isn’t working in Seneca (Tarrin’s son looked at it but the easy possibility of a loose wire didn’t pan out). And I don’t want to leave the animals alone with just someone feeding them. At least I can ride the horses. My friendly, well behaved horses!

This female roseate skimmer reminds us that some change is good.