Ramblings – The Hermits' Rest

Organization Overload

Oh my, I don’t even recognize myself this week. You see, one of my “features” is that I love organizing things, but paradoxically, I let things get very disorganized when I get upset about whatever it is. (Expect a disorganized tack room in the future).

When I was a younger person, all my books were organized by fiction, nonfiction, and crafts, and in high school I made my own card catalog and record album catalog. No Excel yet to make spreadsheets. So I’ve always liked cataloging and organizing objects I love.

As a teen, I also loved nail polish and organized my bottles by color, along with my friend Lynn. It kept us out of trouble!

We didn’t have such fancy stuff in the 70s.

I still love nail polish, an odd but fairly harmless hobby. I’ve found that I enjoy nail strips made from real polish to work well for me. I’m good at putting them on (due to being crafty), and they remove with plain nail polish remover—so much easier on my nails than salon manicures. Um, this is all to say that in the past 4-5 years I’ve worn and accumulated some strips. (understatement)

So, my pusher…I mean nail lady…hooked me up with an app that tracks the stuff I use. I entered all the ones I’d already used (I’d posted it in a Facebook group) and then entered all the ones I have, conveniently organized by color and such. I do like organization. Voilà.

and more

The ones in waiting. I use one set a week. I probably don’t need any more.

But hey. It’s organized! Now go off and laugh at me for having a weird and wasteful hobby. I don’t blame you and also don’t care. I think we’re all entitled to odd pastimes as long as they aren’t putting us deep in debt. And I’m not. I realize that this, and a few other hobbies (yarn, shoes) will have to go bye-bye once I retire and am on a fixed income. I’m already not spending as much on horses…

All this cleaning means my hat is moving slowly.

So instead of worrying about all that, I’m doing that organizing stuff I do every few years or so. Yep. That’s the rate at which I organize my craft material. Thanks to those fine new shelves I wrote about last time, I took advantage of having more space in my office closet to drag all my yarn and craft books out of the storage container and put them away.

I’m ridiculously proud of myself for getting this done. I got rid of a lot of stuff I don’t need, and collected many odds and ends of very nice yarn to share with my next-door neighbor. Many boxes went out the door! Yes! I de-cluttered!

Of course, the books are not in any order yet, and I need to sort the yarn by weight better than it is now. At least I have pretty stuff to look at, and all my needles are in one place. I had too many things in too many tote bags. That’s a common knitter/crocheter thing!

I also have my embroidery, needlepoint, and weaving stuff all together. I know where everything is for the first time since I left my house in Brushy Creek. That feels good.

Some bags have projects or future projects in them.

Here I go down my emotional wormhole…

In this big clean-up, I got rid of a lot of the emotional baggage from people who made doing my hobby less than fun. It’s like with the horses—I need to separate the things I love (knitting, horses) from people who hurt me deeply. It’s about time in that knitting thing! But I got through the La Leche League stuff, the mean dog guy here in Cameron, and (mostly) my psychotic sister. I can do this!

So, I wonder if I’m brave enough to tackle my clothes closet? I have so much to pare down there. It needs a cleanse of negative energy! Who’s hiding in there?

Books I’d Like to Read

What books do you want to read?

Look! A prompt I haven’t already answered! And on a day I’m too tired of thinking to write anything coherent. So, sure, I’ll tell you what books I’d like to read!

Sunset was pretty 360° around this evening

I want to read books about horses, birds, dogs, wildlife, native plants, and weird nature facts. I want to read about science, language, and (factual) history. I want to read about ways to make the world a better place and the people who do so.

I want to read about fiber arts, fiber artists, and the history of everyday things. I want to read about architecture, interior design, and clothing design to learn more about creating beautiful spaces and cozy surroundings.

And pattern instructions. I like reading them. More on my hat tomorrow.

I want to read about how to keep my mind and body healthy and how to nurture relationships with others.

I want to read stories about ordinary people facing life’s challenges in ways that inspire me and make me laugh.

I’ll never run out of things to read. Being able to read and write is one privilege I cling to with deep gratitude. It’s hard to separate “me” from all the words (and images) around me. And I treasure the unique words and images of others. I’d rather read a messy and ungrammatical article than something made bland and perfect by machines.

You have to go past ice to get out of here.

Wishing safety and warmth to all of us still dealing with cold, ice, and snow.

Cozy Cocoon

The cold front arrived and we got down to 16°F, with a high of only 24° so my blanket square for today will be all purple! That and getting to watch this hawk on my big stump were the big highlights for my day.

We missed most of the snow, so it was more of an ice festival than winter wonderland outside.

With our fairly rough expectations in previous arctic blasts, our local family were all pleased we had heat (only got down to 64° downstairs and upstairs kept normal 67°). We were very relieved to find that the turkeys DID use their hut last night and most of today. I put water inside the chicken coop so they only had to go out to eat. It was kind of fun watching them skate around to get to food.

This animal was thrilled with the weather once the sleet stopped.

The horses spent a lot of time in their shelter, and had water, because Spice broke the ice with her hooves. She’s an equine survivalist. Tomorrow it should get above freezing and we will pry the food dishes out of the ice and they will be happier. They ate food off the ice just fine, though.

I spent most of the day bundled up under my 2025 blanket working on another hat with gray ombré yarn. I’ll add a red tassel! Oh, and there was football to watch and more people to talk to on phone, Zoom, and otherwise (young people next door came here for warm showers). That’s not bad for a cozy shut-in day!

I did want to say one thing about current events: if you do not feel safe expressing yourself in front of other people, you’re not being unsupportive; you’re protecting yourself. Do whatever you can, as much as you can, but don’t let peer pressure bring on guilt. Some of us have safety in numbers and the means to do more than others. The goal is for most of us in this country to make it through this difficult time and emerge safe, strong, and ready to rebuild broken relationships and institutions.

Other countries have done it. Image from Jetpack image library.

I sound so optimistic. But it’s good to have hope.

The Calm before…

Oh you know the phrase. Yes, everyone in the southeast of the USA knows a storm is coming. We’ve all bought bread, milk (ok, not me), flashlight batteries, and foods that don’t need refrigeration, so we can keep the doors shut if the Texas power grid fails again.

I don’t think the mistletoe will have problems with the weather unless the branch it’s on breaks.

Animals are safe, too. Got food and shelter. And Carlton is healing well. Relief.

My plans are to stay home and inside other than feeding equines and fowl. I have appropriate clothing for that.

Our winter red-stem storksbill will probably be fine, too.

Tomorrow I have lots of work to keep me busy and this weekend I have crafts (making a hat), reading, and talking to friends to occupy my time.

And I’m feeling better, thanks to my extended community. I’m so grateful.

Self Encouragement

I can’t say I’m doing all that well these days. Anxiety attacks are getting in the way of trying to live a reasonable life. One woke me up this morning! Geez! Everyone has times like this in their lives, to give them something to compare to when good times come along, right? Sure!

I write like a third grade student, sigh.

Today I found myself painting rocks while trying to organize a complicated piece of writing. I now see they were all messages to myself. That gave me a chuckle. They are still drying, so I’ll give you other recent messages.

This is the other side. I hug much more now than I used to.

It was too cold and cloudy to do much birding today, which didn’t help my mood. Tomorrow should be okay, so I’ll get out more and make Apache do things for no real reason. Maybe I’ll try to do some liberty work with him, or something.

My other new hobby seems to be painting things without enough contrast.

Honestly, today wasn’t all bad. Work was good and we finally started watching Star Fleet Academy, which is very Star Trek. In it, they’ve recovered from a huge disaster, and that positive outlook was nice to see.

By the way, thanks for your positive comments on my recent writings. It feels good to think I give people food for thought. I assure you that many of you inspire me!

Processing

I couldn’t write much last night, because I’d had some wine and wasn’t able to sort through the events of the day well enough. I’m not sure that I’m finished processing yet, but I’m working on it.

It was extra cold yesterday morning! I finally got to make a temperature blanket square with purple in it (it was 21° F). It did warm up enough to take a nice walk mid-morning, though. bluebirds were everywhere, and I found their gentle song quite comforting.

After watching yet another team I like lose in the American football playoffs (all the ones I liked lost in close games), Lee and I brought more hay out for the horses, and of course they all got out and scattered in search of better grass, of which there wasn’t any. They didn’t know that. At least I got exercise encouraging them to come back in.

It’s a very good thing they can’t see this cover crop across the road. It’s so green (rye grass, I assume).

Where I got all my processing to process was going to a gathering of woman at a friend’s house. It was very heartwarming to see so many like-minded women in one place. Some of the conversation was hard on me. I heard details of activities of people I already disapprove of that made me sick.

It’s really like the mega-wealthy who have the power live in yet a third society where the guidelines for ethical and moral behavior do not apply. I guess I knew this. You can pretty much do anything if you’re a white man in that society. It makes their hard-core MAGA followers seem tame. I guess I could have lived without so many details, though it’s good to know. (I do not have citations for you, but I heard them).

Yuck. How I wish we’d been able to keep on the path toward making Martin Luther King’s dream come true. I’d sure sleep better at night.

But, human nature doesn’t fundamentally change, does it? We have more machines, infrastructure, and stuff, but there are still elites and powerless people, wars started just because someone is power hungry, and people living in fear. It was this way a thousand years again, two thousand years ago, and no doubt long before that.

Fighting human nature is frustrating and will fail more often than it succeeds. I will still keep trying.

Happy Turkey, Grateful Human

Darryl Jr and Connie Gobbler are going to be happier this chilly weekend, because they are getting their very own Turkey Hut! It’s a custom-crafted abode made of the finest leftovers from construction projects.

The space is designed to be big enough for the turkeys to enter and exit but small enough to keep them warm. It will be placed against the henhouse wall once completed. The opening faces south, away from the cold north winds.

Lee wants it to look good, so it will have siding, a metal roof (it slants to the rear so rain will drain, and spiffy paint matching the barns here. I enjoyed hanging out with my son on my lunch break, getting supplies and treats from the bakery. Having some family fun helps remind me of the good in the world.

And this rock symbolizes how today felt to me. I’m deeply grateful to friends who have been incredibly supportive and kind for the past few days. I’m much more emotionally stable just knowing that I have real friends, including those from all over the political and spiritual spectrum, and from both inside and outside the US. And heck, my family have also been so good to me today—I feel a little more inclined to look forward to fun someday. I even had a great talk with a coworker about potential future plans after we finished writing some complex stuff.

Rainbow from earlier in the week, compliments of neighbor Vicki.

So yeah, it’s not the most peaceful time to be alive, but I’ve not been abandoned by all my communities, and I know I’ve led as good a life as I could. No one can take that away!

And tomorrow the turkeys will have a hut.

What’s the Use?

Dammit. When I read 1984 I never thought it would be coming true in 40 years. I give up. The truth, kindness, laws, and peace no longer are important to so many that I just need to give up for a while. I’ve been trying to see all the beauty and good around me. But I’m very sad. People are living up to their awful reputations. I must take a break and regroup.

It would help if I kept my own beliefs in mind. It might work for you, too.

Good news: I did see the Black Phoebe today and 60 other species. That gave me some positive moments!

I paid attention and also saw a female Pyrrhuloxia

Anyway. My Reminder Rocks have a message for everyone.

I’m not giving up, though. This is a BIG rock. it bears repeating.

I’ll be back in a while.

Obstacles

One of the rocks I painted paraphrases Marcus Aurelius, the Stoic philosopher. It’s an idea that I lean on when challenges arise: the obstacle is the way.

My spouse bases much of his ethical foundation on Stoicism, and I also find that way of thinking helpful. Life is a series of challenges that you face as best as you can, while acknowledging that you can’t solve every problem. That works.

But I also stop to relish the beauty on that path.

I got a little solar lamp as my white elephant gift at the Master Naturalist holiday event. I hung it up near the birding station. It’s a dim beacon, but it will show me the way when I want to sit outside at night (but it won’t confuse birds). It reiterates in my mind what I keep hearing from many sources, which is not to give up when there’s still a dim ray of hope, even if in the end, you fail. Now that made me think of Anne Frank and get all weepy.

Keep being the light of hope, kindness, and caring for those around you.

Scum, Reporting for Duty

I’ve recently learned that the current US President believes I am scum. And since he’s not a fan of lying (i.e. he seems to believe everything he says at least when it’s logorrhea-ing out of his mouth), it must be true. I think I’ll just own it.

There, I’m very blue and appear manic, though I don’t look like me.

I’m just gonna embrace my woke-i-tude even more than my usual hippie horse mom vibe. I bought shirts that shove my attitude right in people’s faces, both coming and going. I’m just gonna wear stuff like this every day. I do have sweatshirts, too.

The two-sided shirts are from dear person.co and took a long time to get here. The bottom one is from the Bitter Southerner. My other shirt from there says “radicalized by common decency.” Yeah. I’m that scary woke scum person who cares about everyone.

I’m glad I have attire to remind me to not forget my beliefs and morals. Just search for those companies or find your own radically caring slogan.

In less scummy news, I went back to work today and I was genuinely glad to see how my coworkers were doing and relieved at some good news from my perspective.

I had a late meeting so I did animal chores mid afternoon. That made the fowl happy. Darryl eats a lot, so I’ve increased their food quantity.

Apache made me laugh today. He rarely expresses strong opinions, but today he informed me in no uncertain terms that he would NOT go over our little hill on the right track. You see, Lee had started to add some dirt to it just before the front-end loader died, so there was fresh dirt on one end that hadn’t been smoothed down.

Apache was fine on left track, but when I changed directions, he pawed his feet. I asked him to keep going, so he walked to the top, turned to face me, then executed a perfect backup down the hill, stopping in the correct position to stretch his legs. It’s like he was saying he didn’t want to make a circle going down the new dirt side, but he’d happily skip to the backing up we usually do afterwards.

Here he’s demonstrating the stretch (okay, actually acting like he has to pee).

I said okay, we can do other stuff, so we trotted and cantered over poles and the cavaletti jump. Then some perfectly executed side passes on the ground were executed. I mean, I just asked once and he did it!

I went back to the hill with Apache and he enthusiastically trotted going left. But nope, not to the right. I convinced him to go once, then he decided he needed to be more firm about his wishes and gave a buck and a snort. I got the message and we finished with a little walk before I went back to work.

I think he may have believed he’d slip on the loose dirt. Or something. He’s a horse, after all.