daily life – Page 33 – The Hermits' Rest

Games People Play

What’s your favorite game (card, board, video, etc.)? Why?

I admit it. I like word games. My two favorites are Scrabble and Big Boggle. No one will play me because I’m a word professional. I’m NOT the best at either game, honest. I’m above average. I’d probably be better if anyone would play with me.

I don’t like the kind of games people play with interpersonal relationships. That’s why I enjoyed today. I spent much more time than usual talking to friends. It was a nice mix of light-hearted stuff and serious conversation. I’m sure glad I have friends to just hang out with sometimes!

This is me getting ready to go out, with a lurking husband. I was trying to show a friend my coordinating ensemble.

After talking with folks and hashing out some of my angst, I’m feeling a lot more balanced and able to act the way my principles tell me to. That made it worth a Zoom call and driving to Rockdale for fish tacos!

I’m calmer than this poor doe who was so rattled by my presence that she ran off quite flatulently. Here she’s resting between gas attacks.

Go off and enjoy your weekend. That’s my plan.

Companion Animal Preferences

Dogs or cats?

First. I like both dogs and cats. I’ve had both as pets, though never more than two cats at once.

Vlassic points out he has cat-like reflexes

I had cats when I lived in apartments and when my children were small because it was easier. They aren’t much work unless you really work at interacting. I don’t see all the moods and personalities others see in cats. They all make the same two or three faces and look nice curled into a ball. This makes me sound like not a cat person. But I’d have one if Lee wasn’t so allergic.

This is the only cat I know now, Potato. She lives with my son.

What I don’t like is cat pee and dirty litter boxes. My sister’s houses always reeked of cat poo. I could never stay long. And I had a cat that got all annoyed at us and peed all over my house, mostly in hidden spots on plastic bags. It was horrible. Once we let him go outside he was fine. We were sure he’d get killed quickly and die happy, but no. He held out forever. He lasted longer than any of my marriages (though Lee only has two years to go to last longer).

Mostly I’ve had dogs. I get along with dogs. Many of my early playmates were neighborhood dogs, back when they all roamed the neighborhood. Our black spaniel dog Maggie was my nice big sister, and Pumpkin, the dachshund mix who came afterwards, was so much a part of the family that we’d forget she couldn’t talk. She was there for my dad and brother while my mom was sick, and was the perfect emotional therapy dog, before that was a thing.

Carlton has been my emotional therapy dog. Here is the day we took him home.

Since we got our family dogs when my kids got older, Gwynn the Corgi and Scrunchy, the pug, I haven’t been without a dog. Well, make that “we” haven’t been without a dog. They are mostly Lee’s dogs, but I enjoy all six of them, too.

I’d feel weird without a dog. However, it hurts so much to lose one. I just looked at all my photos of dogs. Sniff. I miss our past companions. But here are random shots of the ones we have now, who are just as good!

PS: it’s looking cloudy out and there is rain predicted. That would sure be good.

Not much left of the little pond except crawfish and bullfrog homes.

Lost in Time

Which activities make you lose track of time?

Ah, I’m answering this question rather than sharing my current thoughts. They’ll be more refined tomorrow.

For certain, what my husband will tell you makes me lose track of time is nature walks. I just disappear and re-emerge with no idea how long I was gone. I’m completely enthralled by the sights, sounds, and smells of new places or new things in familiar places. I don’t want it to end.

Here’s a new thing I found in the driveway! It’s delicious common purslane, a portulaca (*Portulaca oleracea*) just like the cultivated one below.

Look at the beautiful Texas Striped Sweat Bee in my volunteer portulaca/moss rose

Hanging out with the animals also can make me lose track of time. I’ve just spent twenty minutes thinking about how beautiful Carlton is to me. My love for this guy never ends.

I ended up spending more time with Drew today than I’d intended, too. I’d walked to the next-door unused mailbox to drop something off, and decided to come back through the horse pasture, you know, in case there were any interesting plants or insects. So, I was concentrating on plants when I got a feeling I was being followed.

I kept going until I felt something hot on my neck.

Then I realized Droodles was sneaking up on me.

We ended up hanging out for quite a while just enjoying each other’s company. He didn’t push me around looking for treats, just rested his head on me and asked to be scratched. It’s so good to get along with each other again!

Mostly. That ear is showing some mischief is afoot.
Yes, I’m not much of a fashionista in this weather. That shirt is very orange and the head covering looks silly but keeps hair out of my face.

Not surprisingly, the other activity that leads me to lose track of time is reading. I’ve been reading Sibley Birds, Second Edition since I bought it in New Mexico. It’s only 600+ pages. I can’t stop looking at all the birds, learning new things about familiar ones and finding out what else might be out there in Texas (and wherever else I go).

I will admit to skimming Arctic residents and ocean birds. Otherwise, I’m reading it all. But I’m in the oriole section! I’m almost done! Do not worry. I have a nice long book about animal tracks lined up. That’s what happens when people stop mailing me novels, I guess. (I’m fine for novels! I have some enqueued.)

If I’m repeating myself, forgive me. I’m working on changing my mindset and that can wear me out until I’m through the hardest part (letting go of an unproductive mindset).

Thanks for being there, friends and family. You are appreciated even when I don’t show it well.

Relaxing

We didn’t get any rain today, but we got nice clouds, and the high temperature barely got into the 90s.

That enabled me to accomplish many mundane outdoor tasks like weeding and setting up the pool furniture, work with Drew (sadly, Apache has a sore foot AGAIN*), and relax.

After a good day’s work and all those chores, I went for a nice swim for more exercise. The water feels great now that we figured out that the pool heater was somehow turned on and it’s back to normal! I got in my beloved pool float and just drifted around in the cool breeze. I felt like a happy wet noodle.

No photos of me floating, so here’s this morning’s Great Egret in the pond.

To demonstrate how relaxed I was: after I got out I sat in my chair by the woods to listen to birds. It was just perfect, so chill that when I heard a rustling noise I just looked down and enjoyed watching a shiny coach whip snake go on its way along the fence.

It stopped at the gate and paused, looking at me with its bright eyes, then headed on its way. It just said, “Hey, snake.”

Amazing what a little break in the weather can do for you.

*his foot is sore from getting some stuff trimmed that exposed bruising from his previous episode. Tarrin told me how to treat it, and he’s better today.

I’m Not Getting Older, I’m Getting Better?

What do you think gets better with age?

The ambiguous question here could be asking about fine wine, whiskey, cheese, or the patina on sculptures. It could also be asking what gets better as people get older. I’ll answer that one, though I warn you a lot of it will sound familiar. I don’t have that many themes in me.

One thing that I and many of my friends have found to get better with age is the ability to not need to be popular, liked, or acclaimed. It’s like that dull women group on Facebook: we are able to accept our ordinariness as well as our quirks and unique features. Not everyone will be impressed. And many of us elders are just fine with it. Loving yourself just as you are is something that takes a while to learn, for many.

Age also brings long-term perspective. It’s hard to have the insights that come from a long view until you have one. If you make it past age 50 or so you start to see patterns that repeat and can say, oh yes, I remember when television was going to ruin us but didn’t — probably video games didn’t ruin our children and TikTok won’t ruin our grandchildren. Maybe.

Me pensively taking the long view. Best I can do.

A final gift of age is that you come to appreciate little things in life. As your mind and body weaken, you are glad you can still read books and move around some. You appreciate sunrises and sunsets, because you don’t have many left. And you rejoice in the kindnesses you see in others.

That’s the best part for me, ferreting out the goodness hiding in plain sight. Try it! You don’t have to be older to do it!

Speaking of goodness, I cleaned my saddle and replaced my missing conchos. I have a saguaro cactus theme.

(I think the title to my post came from an ad for hair dye, right? Yes, I looked it up. It’s from the early 1970s.)

(Bonus: I think I wrote a five-paragraph paper, the thing we kept being assigned to do in high school. Mrs. Chisholm would be pleased, if she were still on this earth.)

Going to Bed Cooler

What time do you go to bed and wake up currently?

The important thing about going to bed tonight is that it’s in my own bedroom, where I can wind down in comfort. Yes, the parts (mostly) arrived and the upstairs air conditioning unit is fixed. I hated to complain, since downstairs was fine and we are very fortunate to have the motorhome to sleep in (made challenging by the malfunctioning slide—those things are a lot of trouble). I’m happy to be upstairs doing my evening things.

Highlight of my day: new conchos for Apache’s saddle. One of his got lost. Let’s see if I can get them on.

To answer the question, these days I head upstairs at around 9 pm unless there’s something interesting on television (rare). I get ready for bed, but then I stay up blogging (as I am now), adding observations to iNaturalist, and reading. It’s nice and quiet and comfy, so I go to sleep when I feel like it, usually 10:30-11.

Here’s the male of the grasshopper I shared yesterday. Roseate skimmer. Or carmine.

Like in the olden days, I sometimes wake up in the middle of the night and read some more. They say using your phone wakes you up, but I select pretty boring articles. That helps when I wake up concerned about out someone or something.

One concern was that I discovered my very important knitting needle was broken.

I’m usually up around 7 am, except for Thursdays, when I’m up at 6:15 to do open office hours at 7, for the Europeans who might need help with Planview apps. Few do. On the other hand, lots of folks needed help today! It evens out. I’ll really miss all the interesting people I meet once this job ends!

I’ll have more time to ride in the motorhome and look at weather phenomena then.

You may note that I sleep a lot. I always have needed more sleep than many people. I expected to need sleep as I got older, especially since my thyroid medication has bumped up my metabolism a bit. But I sure enjoy 9 hours. Lee sleeps more than me!

I’m yawning like Carlton, so time for bed!

I do fine on less sleep, but I don’t want to keep Lee up. If I could, I’d stay up so I could watch Colbert or the Daily Show. I miss them, but avoiding too much gnashing of teeth over news is healthy for me.

Present and Future Excitement

What are you most excited about for the future?

Gosh, I’m not excited about much in the future. Watching the fall of a civilization and seeing the rights of myself and my friends and family threatened isn’t what I’d call exciting; it’s more terrifying. And I feel so small and powerless (if one more person tells me I can make everything better by voting I will over-react in a ridiculous fashion. I DO vote but that’s not how things truly get done).

I’m feeling old, tattered, and fragile, like this wind-beaten Viceroy

Wait, I do look forward to driving around in Seneca and finding new bits of nature to explore. I hope to have that freedom. After all, I’m a harmless old woman and I have a heterosexual spouse, so I’m not too threatening on the surface. I just want to look at birds, bugs, and plants. Finding new ones is excitement enough for me.

This katydid was new for me: Black-margined Shieldback (*Pediodectes nigromarginatus*), pretty much only found in Texas.

And maybe Drew and I can become good partners! At least he is listening to my instructions like a champ this week. He walks until he is asked to trot. Hoorah!

We are good equines. We will be here for future excitement.

As for present excitement, we didn’t get any with Hurricane Beryl in our part of Texas, so I concentrated on seeing how my friends near Houston and on the coast fared. I was happy that our family members made it fine.

There was wind and .11” of rain here. I enjoyed the wind and the smell you get from hurricane clouds. You smell a little salt are, like the “cool Gulf breeze” Lee’s dad used to talk about when it was sweltering in Yorktown, Texas. To me it feels like Florida, when I’d take long walks at night in my breezy neighborhood just west of Ft. Lauderdale. I just stood and felt the wind for a good while this afternoon. Living in the moment!

Here’s a moment: the blanket through yesterday. If it hadn’t cooled off yesterday, there would have been a whole row of 95-99° highs.

I think the livestock were the happiest with today’s weather. The wind or “something gray” blew open the gate to the back pasture, so I found the horses far away at horse time. They liked that. Plus, Bianca, the lone chicken, was practically her old self today, since it didn’t get over 90°. She was out catching insects and sitting in the water trough like a happy hen.

Even her comb has some color in it again.

So yeah, even though I’m going through one of my pessimistic spates, I see what’s good out there! We all need each other’s support, so if you notice someone faltering, please reach out!

Maybe my exciting future bird will look like this!

Harmony, Before the Storm

What could you let go of, for the sake of harmony?

I’m pretty tired from moving things to minimize potential tropical storm damage and a bit warm because I’m sleeping in the upstairs bedroom with no air conditioning. I have a fan and an open window, at least until rain starts. So, I’ll answer this blog prompt quickly.

For the sake of harmony I’ve let go of any drive I have to clarify my perspective on things that happen to me. I don’t need to prove I’m right or justified to anyone else. That’s led to a lot of harmony.

I’ve also let go of the desire to have a say in current or future plans that involve anyone other than myself. It’s not worth trying to provide input or ask questions that will come across as nosy. I make my own plans for things that are just my “stuff” and do my best to let people who are affected know. I try, anyway. That’s just how I do things. I don’t need to know what other folks are up to (in general, not making a barbed comment). I just used to be way too curious/interested.

There’s probably more, but it boils down to learning to stay in my own lane, accept changes and new situations as gracefully as I can muster, and let go of expectations. This makes work, community life, and family life much less stressful for me and reduces at least some potential conflict.

And gives me more time to enjoy the weather.

For every situation there’s more than one right solution and it’s not my job to find it every time! And I don’t HAVE to share my opinion so much. That has been hard to learn and I’m not quite as far along as I’d like to be. But since I started out as the annoying student who raised her hand to answer the teachers’ questions every single time, I had a long way to go.

Curious as to what these are? I’ll tell you! They are seed pods of the beautiful pitcher’s leather flower vine *Clematis pitcheri*

Now to keep my phone charged in case we lose power. Beryl should not be too bad this far north. Think about our family on the Texas coast and my Houston friends!

Americana Listening

What is your favorite genre of music?

I guess my experience with being in a vocal trio with a Kerrville Folk Festival devotee, volunteering at a monthly folk coffeehouse for years, and living with a rock/country guitarist for three years or so doomed me. I became pretty fond of Americana music. What’s that?

I’m lucky to have lived in Austin, Texas (or thereabouts) for 30 years or more. There is a lot of Americana music to watch. I watched and listened to a lot of it with my music friends. I loved this part of my life.

Oddly, I don’t listen much anymore. I think it has to do with the loss of my older son, who is a wonderful mandolin player (he’s not dead, just refuses to speak). And some unpleasantness happened to my other son in the music scene. Plus, my vocal cords are now damaged and I can’t sing certain notes now. It has taken away the pleasure of music.

That took a dark turn. Of course there were wonderful musical moments in my life. And music moves me when I do listen. And not just Americana! I love classic rock, classical, and Celtic especially. and the music of nature, naturally. Heh heh.

Eh. I’ll stop before I go on and on about favorite artists. Enjoy looking at Fiona and Drew.

I’m fine. Just musing. Long weekend.

Not a Good Deja Vu

Once upon a time I was in charge of a large flock of chickens that the owners were no longer interested in taking care of. Their coop had a door, but an animal had broken the screening. Let’s just say soon I had a small flock of chickens. Then I had one. Big Red hung on for a few more years.

I got a much sturdier coop and kept a few more chickens. I was down to six most of this year, then something got Bertie Lee. Then Blondie.

When I had seven. We lost the gray one last year.

Last night something got almost everyone else by coming in through their door and getting them while roosting. My fault. The hens liked to free range so I didn’t lock the door to their run. If the dang bobcat wanted them so bad, why didn’t he take them? Or maybe it was a raccoon. Or any other of the many predators we have.

I’ll really miss Buttercup. She and Bertie Lee were the friendliest ones I ever had.

I’m glad we didn’t have an attack like this for four years! But today was bad and made me cry. I’d had these hens a long time. But one is here still, poor Bianca, who can’t take the heat. It’s hard to be a lone chicken like Big Red was. She bonded with Sara’s horses. Either Bianca will do that or the predator will come back.

Circle of life. Blah blah.

If I get more chickens it will be in the fall, when it is cooler. In the meantime I’ll clean the henhouse out really well. Sigh. This past week has been rough.

At least the horses are okay. Apache seemed off yesterday but today he ate his food and took his meds like a champ. And Drew did all his exercises right, paying attention to me, his leader.

Thanks for being a good guy, Droodles. You were even good for your shot.

As icing on the cake, we are sleeping in the RV because our upstairs air conditioner has broken and won’t get fixed until Monday. Oh course, now is the time the bedroom slide decides to not extend so I can’t make the bed. Sigh again.

I’m doing a lot of deep breathing and trying to be kind to myself. I’d hoped to have lunch with friends today to cheer me up, but just one friend made it. I enjoyed a Negra Modelo in honor of Buttercup, Henley, and Billie Idyll and was consoled by Phyllis. I’m grateful to her and all my sympathetic Facebook buddies.

We can get through this stuff together (this means YOU, too, members of my household).