community – Page 6 – The Hermits' Rest

My Favorites

Who are your current most favorite people?

I’ll tell you who my favorite people are right now. They are the ones who:

Care about Mother Earth and show it
Believe everyone has a right to be their authentic selves
Work to protect and support their communities
Are capable of disagreeing respectfully
Do their best to keep learning and loving their whole lives
Accept that they can’t always do all of these things all the time, and extend grace to themselves

If I were a betting person, I’d wager that you are one of my favorite people.

Committed to Telling People What They Mean to Me.

This afternoon, Lee, our friend Martha, and I drove back to our old haunt, Live Oak Unitarian Universalist Church in Cedar Park. Due to some PTSD (at least on my part), it doesn’t happen often. But there we were, right where we used to be.

And there I was, doing what I used to do, singing with Bill. He asked me to join him, so I tried to remember how to sing.

A dear friend, Esther, passed away recently, and the Celebration of Life was today. This couple was a role model for our marriage, support when Lee’s dad was ill. I sang in the church choir for many years with Jim, and he brought me fish and game from time to time (I loved threatening to make squirrel stew from his bounty). He hated squirrels as much as Anita does.

As I listened to Jim share the touching story of their long and loving marriage, followed by funny and moving stories about Esther from their children and more, it occurred to me how Esther would have enjoyed the evening. Gee, most of the family are professional writers, so anyone would have enjoyed it.

My choir and women’s group friends with Jim.

What sparked in me was a desire to let all my old friends I saw at the service know how much I appreciated them and their contributions to my life. I did a lot of extra-hard hugging of my women’s group buddies and former choir friends. And a few people were probably a bit embarrassed to hear me tell them how much they mean to me. I was sorry a couple of people had to leave early. I’d have blubbered even more.

I blubbered at Ricky because he called me “Sue-Nanna,” which is what he always called me. Then we talked about football and golf.

But, in these uncertain times, I don’t know when I’ll see some of these kind and loving souls again. If I didn’t tell them now, when would I? I just looked into their faces and wanted to savor every moment.

I see them on Facebook all the time, but their in-person faces. Ahhh.

Please, if you get a chance to see people you care deeply about, tell them. Show them. It won’t hurt to tell them multiple times. It helps counteract some of the negativity. I’m glad Lee, Martha, and I got to do it.

I’m committed to telling everyone I see that I care about how much they mean to me now, while I can.

The Owls’ Lesson

Owls are everywhere in my life now. You may recall that I saw the same Great Horned Owl (I assume) each time I walked through the woods on the prayer trail on Hilton Head. It would fly up a new branch where I could see and hear it but not photograph it.

Eternally grateful to this healing space.

Since I got back to the Hermits’ Rest on Sunday, owls have been calling morning and night. I’ve heard them occasionally before, but even the Merlin app has heart multiple Great Horned Owls calling back and forth.

Late yesterday afternoon, we were talking to the man who leases our property for his cattle and the owls were so loud we had to stop our conversation. I began to wonder if they were trying to get my attention.

Now, I doubt the owls give us humans a second thought. Still, this morning I heard them, as well as all dusk and into the night. Sometimes it was like owl stereo.

I have not been at all grounded since we got back to Texas. Yesterday I had that annoying buzzy head and feeling my blood rushing that I used to get often. Today I was in panic attack mode most of the morning, barely able to speak. Then my nervous stomach kicked in to where I couldn’t go to my horse lesson. I was feeling puny and powerless.

I was also prickly like this noseburn vine!

After feeding the horses, I sat down to try for the third time of the day to breathe and meditate. That’s when the owls went into heavy hooting mode. So I just listened. Finally, I was able to regulate my breathing and get back into the moment…just in time for flocks of Sandhill Cranes to clamor their way across the crisp afternoon sky.

I thought about what lesson I could draw from being surrounded by these apex predators. What could I take on for myself?

Owls aren’t in your face. They blend in with their surroundings and keep their power to themselves until they need it. That seems like a useful strategy to borrow.

Owls have their communities (hoot, hoot) and stay in touch with their beloved members. I need to do that better, especially with those not on social media. I’m thankful to those who prod me to keep in touch.

Most important to me is that owls know where they fit in with the grand scheme of things. They help keep prey populations from growing too large, but don’t take more than they need. They act as if the trees, meadows, mice, and birds are not less important than them. I think humans (me) could learn from this.

I’m grateful to the owls for reminding me to stay focused on the here and now and to hold on to my strength for when I’ll need it.

Grief comes in waves, and sometimes they push you under for a while. Today I let waves of grief and fear wash over me, though I’m not sure why it hit today. If you are one of those who struggled today, remember you’re not alone and can try to soar and swoop like the cranes and owls tomorrow.

Blessed be.

Gaining Ground through Grounding

I’ve made a couple of resolutions today. You could even call them goals. One’s pretty easy, but vital, and the other is harder if you’re a hermit.

I’m going to spend even more time outdoors to keep myself grounded.
I want to do something kind for someone every day – something that might not occur to me to do if I wasn’t being conscious about it.

How did I do?

Today it wasn’t so rainy, so I was able to get out and about multiple times today as I sought out the quiet, natural parts of this very green but rather loud island where I’m staying (Hilton Head). I was seeking the ability to really ground myself and bring back my sense of peace and lovingkindness.

The first time I went for a walk, I looked for new natural spots. Mostly I found leaf blowers, garbage trucks, and construction equipment, but I did eventually come to a little hidden path where the birds were gathering and there were many interesting plants.

I took lots of photos of seeds, berries, and weird fungi, but I didn’t feel very grounded. Plus I was not thrilled to realize halfway through this rather long walk that I’d left the Apple Watch on the charger. Oh no! My exercise didn’t count! (I realized it did count, health-wise, but not watch-wise.)

It’s weird only working four days a week. It’s even weirder on an island with no transportation. So, after a little rest and putting my watch back on, I headed for the beach. It was an interesting day there, because fog had lingered way past mid-day. I was able to see a cormorant fishing, as well as the usual pelicans, gulls, and Sanderlings. Here is also where I accomplished goal number two and was rewarded greatly.

I saw a woman struggling to put up a shade cover all by herself. At first I thought, oh she can handle it. Then I bravely (for me) went up and asked if she could use some help. She could! So, I wrestled with her wiggly setup and we got it working. As we talked, it turned out she is an editor at a horse magazine and has a horse much like Apache, only larger. So we each enjoyed talking about PPID, working equitation, and horse nutrition. So far, doing kind things is working out great, at least on the first day.

After another rest, okay, actually a long nap, I realized that I still hadn’t gotten to the really grounded state I need to find every day to keep my spirits up and not fall into my doomsday thinking. By now it was near sunset, which is ridiculously early thanks to Standard Time. I headed back out, this time with a plan I was sure would work: I went back to the Presbyterian prayer trail.

This is a magical couple of acres that is chock-full of native trees and shrubs that have been allowed to live out their lives, like Wohlleben recommends. It’s because Hilton Head Island was isolated for most of the time intense logging was done, and occupied just by the Gullah folks who mostly did small farming plots and a lot of fishing. There are still old-growth forests here.

I looked at the map and realized there were more trails than I’d been on last time. I got deep within the woods and was able to set on a Leopold bench and meditate. The trees masked traffic and children playing to where I could just breathe as the Hermit Thrush called and called. I got the feeling I needed.

I knew I was on the right path literally and metaphorically when something moved next to the creek at the back of the trail. It was a very large bird. When it settled, I realized it was an owl, a Great Horned Owl. Merlin doesn’t even have them listed as a possible bird here. But, there it was. No photos of the owl. I was just looking through my eyes, not a phone.

When I realized the sun had set, I headed off to find the beach again, which was not easy, since the nearest beach access was actually closed. I managed to get into the Marriott resort, though, where I found a very loud Mockingbird that led to another random conversation, this time with a like-minded birder from England.

The beach didn’t disappoint me this time, as I got to see the beautiful reflections of the clouds in the tidal pools. I have such fond memories of coming here with Anita and enjoying these views together. The moon was out and reflected in the water, which was magical. What felt like a miracle occurred. I got that feeling of deep contentment that I get when Nature surprises me. I was happy for the first time in quite some time, probably since the last horse show.

You should be glad I edited these down to just four.

We all have things we need to keep going. I’m glad that my needs aren’t to put others down, to think only of my own personal gains, or to dominate. Being grounded and finding ways to be kind to others is what I’ll rely on as times get challenging.

Hugs All Around

It’s a hard day in the USA, so I’m sending hugs it to all. Let’s send peaceful energy out to our country even if we disagree with what happens. We’re still all family.

Love is what we need, and what I experienced today. I found a little clump of trees chock full of beautiful birds this morning. The woodpeckers were everywhere.

Maybe my best bird photo ever. Red-bellied Woodpecker.

I’m not going to go on and on about birds. It’s killing my blog stats, but they do bring me comfort. There were lots of them today, in between doing things to distract myself. Thank goodness for my relatives and their willingness to drive me all over the place! At our late lunch at Hudson’s I had a divine crab cake and the best potato salad ever. I saw lovely herons and of course, gulls.

Then we went to the nature preserve I love to visit. They’ve done a lot there since last year, but the rugged beauty was also there. I got lots of ideas for the Wild Wings Bird Sanctuary to share with our committee. And it was beautiful near sunset.

We went to “second dinner” because we didn’t want to go back to our rooms. This was at the Fish Camp restaurant next to the beautiful dock overlooking the Broad Creek. We got Old Fashioneds, appetizers and bread pudding. I, of course, went to the beautiful dock and looked for birds, the best of which was a very vocal Clapper Rail. I do love a good marsh at low tide!

Mostly, though the three of us women enjoyed each other’s company, telling stories about our parents, aunts, uncles, and cousins. We are resilient, we determined. It was a beautiful night, and that just added to the fun.

I’m gonna read magazines and check the news later. I feel safe and grounded for now, because I feel the love of my family and friends.

Comforting Conversations

This is probably not an stress-free weekend, even if you’re doing your best to live in the moment and enjoy the present. However, I’ve had a few conversations with friends and strangers that have helped me remember the good and hope in the world.

Lovely ofrenda in the Austin airport. Southwest Airlines does good stuff.

Yesterday started with a talk with a friend who’s a philanthropist, social worker, and former Red Cross volunteer. She’s very concerned about the immediate future. I hope by sharing some of the hopeful things I’ve heard, I helped a bit.

In the early afternoon, Doc Shenkman, my undergrad professor called. He had some opinions on current events to share. I had to smile as I realized he has not lost his passion for politics, social justice, and the importance of good law enforcement.

Reflecting on how his long rant reflected my own views reminded me that while my parents provided some guidance when I was young, it was long Friday night conversations over very bad but very cheap beer ($1.25 a pitcher) helped shape my values, morals, and philosophical orientation for the rest of my life. (I also learned many German drinking songs, because the German club sat next to us.)

The University of Florida had an honors undergraduate curriculum when I was there. We had tenured professors for all our required courses. Thank goodness for those generous souls who taught us to understand literature, the human, and social sciences. I got a real humanities education that I’ve used my whole life. Anyway, I’m lucky to still be friends with Doc, after all these years.

Later, after hugging all the dogs and horses, Lee drove me to the airport. During that trip I continued a text conversation with two former coworkers who are now trusted friends. we each have our reasons to worry about the future, as one of us has a trans family member, one is a gay man, and one is a mother of a teenage girl. It was comforting to talk to each other about our thoughts and experiences during challenging times. It’s good to know you aren’t alone and can both support and be supported right now.

And today at the Austin airport I saw a man wearing a Lincoln Project sweatshirt. I went up to him and gushed about how much we love their work, especially Lee. The man said he gets a lot of that, including people who whisper their support, like they’re behind enemy lines in World War II. He and his young grandson were heading to Charlotte to work at a rally today. The kid was not as impressed as I was that he’d get to meet Jon Bon Jovi, but at least he was excited to meet the Vice President.

I showed him my secret signs of allegiance

The man talked to me a bit about his journey from Bush, to Perot to Obama, which fascinated me. He kept his same convictions but changed to leaders he thought supported them better. Wow.

So I’m feeling okay as I head to South Carolina wearing my mask so I won’t get Covid again. It wasn’t planned that I’d be elsewhere during the Presidential election, but at least this way Lee can watch coverage all day and night and I won’t have to.

Remember. My friendship and love remain even if we disagree. I want the best for us all.

We All Should Know

What’s something you believe everyone should know.

Life would be better for all of us if we realized that we are all one big family on this earth and that we all have a place in the Big Picture. That’s not just people. It’s the whole ecosystem.

I try to think of the Big Picture frequently.

Maybe we’d all live and let live if we bore this in mind. We humans have different cultures, as do other sentient beings. It would sure be nice if there were more coexistence.

Who am I kidding?

I sorta wish the wind would just blow me away. But I’ll manage. You try, too.

Pride That’s Justified

What are you most proud of in your life?

I’m proud of two things in my life right now. One is my son, D. He struggled for a while in his 20s but is now doing work that’s meaningful and is an outlet for his artistic and spatial awareness talents. He did the repairs on his cabin after the severe wind event almost all by himself and it’s so rustic and cute.

And even though he’s my next-door neighbor now, he’s continuing his music career and learning so much about recording, too.

Old photo. He’s now drumming mostly. Public Instagram photo.

Hard work and determination got my boy to a good position in life! He even has a work truck and leads a crew.

Speaking of hard work and determination, the other thing I’m proud of is my relationship with Apache. The two of us have struggled and had so many ups and downs thanks to my insecurity, his nerves, and his health issues. But by gosh, we’ve gotten to where we’re reaching our potential.

We cleaned up well yesterday. I even had a waist.

I was feeling pretty down about horse stuff, mainly because Drew seems uncomfortable again and I just can’t get Apache to take his medication. But, I packed up and de-burred Apache, and off we went with Sara, Aragorn, and their New Zealand visitors.

Shiny, if a bit dusty, and smooth haired.

We ended up handling the show very well. In each of the three events, we did our best. Most important to me was that I wasn’t all nervous and remembered most of what I was supposed to do, even though I didn’t bend him well and there was some hind end issue I’ll have to ask Tarrin about.

After we finished the Trail portion of the show, where you go through obstacles, Tarrin left the judging booth and ran to me, yelling, “Sue Ann! Sue Ann!” I immediately thought I must have gotten disqualified or missed something. But no, she came to tell me I looked better than I ever had. That made me cry.

I nearly cried as I watched this woman and her horse competing in their Century: where the horse and riders’ ages combine to be 100. The beautiful mare is 23.

All in all it was a really pleasant and fun event. I don’t have any photos of me and Apache, but I can tell you he stepped up and did his best, even if he’s not been exercising much lately. I at least seem to have my stamina back, though I was totally zonked last night and went to bed at 9.

I got lots of pictures of Sara and Aragorn. He seemed out of sorts in Functionality but she kept her cool and managed him beautifully.

By the last event, Aragorn was back! He had the fastest overall time! Look at him kicking up dust.

All the competitors and their beautiful horses did great work. Everyone is improving and so supportive of each other. I learn so much watching the better riders.

I just want to show you how great the competitors looked. I was especially thrilled to see two other Paint horses and my favorite cute Appaloosa, who showed in hand.

I’m proud of all of us for trying to show. I’m so happy we found a supportive discipline with no negativity or mistreatment of horses.

From Birds to Bravery

I’m tired so this is quick. The two halves of my day differed greatly. In the first half, I spent a few hours at the Wild Wings Bird Sanctuary with Ann. We got some excellent new birds to add to the list of sightings there, and did a bit of Bioblitz action as well.

We spent time with Gene and Cindy, who were working at selling chickens until we got to them to talk about wild birds. We went over designs for interesting benches to put out in the seating area to replace some rickety ones.

This is a Leopold bench, named after a famous naturalist who made them for bird watching.

We also talked about a logo. I’d used the AI software they want us to use at work to generate a few ideas. We are going with this one, with different colors.

It should be legible and look good in monochrome.

After all our decisions, I went into Cameron to the annual Steak Stein and Wine event. I got a couple of holiday gifts, which I’m proud of. Such a planner! And I got kettle corn, a snow cone, and later a peach Bellini, frozen. Mm.

As always, I enjoyed the car show. This is a Morris pickup truck conversion. Ooh. Want.

But I also was brave. I supported my friends y volunteering at the booth for the county Democratic Party. Why did I do this, if I’m avoiding politics? Honestly, it’s to let others know we are here and just normal people. We had no candidate signs or pamphlets, just a code you could scan to sign up for the mailing list. Mostly people ignored us or were polite, and we had a few nice conversations. Only after the drinking started did one guy get ugly, and I was gone by then.

I am proud for not totally hiding, to maybe encourage others to not be afraid. You shouldn’t be afraid in this country. I’m still going to respect your opinions if they differ from mine, especially if you’ve thought it out. we need to respect each other!

The event also included giant Dairy Queen treats!

I got to have dinner (the steak part of the festival) with family and workers at our nephew’s business. That means I got to see and talk to my son! And the food was better this year, especially the mashed potatoes.

All in all, it was a good, but long, day. I enjoyed seeing friends and acquaintances and was brave!

Bonus pretty photos to follow.

Good Day at Hermits’ Rest

How about that? Things do sometimes work out. And that helped today end up being good. With this face staring at me while I worked, it couldn’t be all bad.

I want to put my head on your arm and press real hard, ok?

I was sitting in the bird watching chair early this morning when I noticed a very large cow was mooing at me softly. She had a weird look on her face, if that’s a thing cows can do.

When she turned sideways I realized she was about to give birth. A hoof was sticking out. I watched for a while then went inside for a meeting. When I set up my computer on the porch, I saw she still had one hoof and something pink sticking out. Hmm.

Many episodes of folksy veterinarian shows on Animal Planet have taught me well. There should be two feet, and labor should be quicker. So we texted her owners. I was worried that they would be tired of us telling them every time we see a laboring cow, but this time we were right to ask them to check.

We are ignoring her. We aren’t much help.

Once her owner got there they saw what I saw, and a difficult ballet of trying to move the cow began. That poor guy, who’s near my age, was sure hustling until he got the great idea to convince all the cattle to go where they are usually fed. Once there, he was able to get the laboring cow into a pen, and with his son, the other owner helping, they straightened the calf’s leg out. Then the birth was easy, and the cute spotted calf was alive!

I felt good knowing we’d helped a little. That made the work day fly by, too. I documented like crazy! I might even get my project done in time. Maybe. Having something to concentrate on has helped my mental state, too. All good! no negativity!

After working and doing horse work, Lee and I were able to relax by the pool and take advantage of the better weather. There was a pleasant breeze that was perfect for enjoying a beverage and petting dogs.

Looking forward to staying peaceful in our little ranch world.