Trying Is So Vital

It very well could be that some of you are sick of me going on and on about learning to canter on horseback. After all, little kids just jump on horses and take off, flying like the wind—how hard can it be?

Hmph. I was told recently that it’s also hard for many young people to learn. So there. And I think many young people feel braver because they haven’t developed a fear of a crippling injury like, say, blue-haired women over 65.

I started lessons on Apache because I felt incompetent and was worried I’d hurt myself in a fall when riding alone. I was ok walking, but I didn’t like going fast, even trotting. But I wanted to try to conquer my fears.

I lucked out and found a trainer who understands both horses and people, and doesn’t force either to do things they aren’t ready for. So we walked a lot at first. And I found out it wasn’t just me who needed help, Apache had to un-learn some unhelpful patterns and have his health issues addressed.

So yeah, this horse thing has been a slow process, but I haven’t given up, even when I’m afraid. Now I’m less afraid than uncertain about whether I can do things. But Tarrin has convinced me that I won’t know until I try. It works, and has spilled over into other areas of my life, where I have more self confidence.

I went from hanging on for dear life while trotting to actually having some finesse and skill with it. And Apache has learned how to do the trot more effectively, which means it’s easier on me. I like that we’re both learning in our golden years. We’ve become a team. We’re a slow team but we keep trying. And I think we both enjoy it.

So today, I was happy to see a much less crusty Apache greet me in the morning. He also seemed to feel a lot better than he did earlier in the week. We ended up having a great lesson after a slow warmup. He cantered well enough that we went into the round pen to try under saddle again.

I’m feeling more confident just from having done the canter lessons before. I feel okay going so fast and jumping before cantering. Today we made it halfway around the circle, not just a few steps. I even sorta lost my balance and fixed it. That makes me feel better about staying on.

I know I have friends competing in dressage or roping or barrel racing for whom this seems like remedial education. But it’s where I’m at and I’m still trying. Sure, we could have gotten to this point faster if certain horses could have stayed healthier, but yay, we’re still here and having fun.

If we don’t try, we won’t get anywhere.