The Hermits' Rest

Who Am I?

Write about your first name: its meaning, significance, etymology, etc.

Well, I’m glad I don’t hide who I am on this blog, or this would be more of a challenge. No doubt I e answered this before over the years, but here I go, in case anyone is at all interested.

Sue Ann means “graceful lily,” according to name books’ etymological declarations. I am pretty damned sure my parents didn’t look at my round and wobbly baby self and name me based on that.

No, after a couple of days of indecision, they named me after two of Dad’s sisters. Of course, as the Kendalls tended to do, they gave me their middle names. I’m glad. Bettye Doris is a mouthful. Bettye went by “Pug” all her life and Doris Ann went by both names, or either, randomly.

Suna came from an existentialist Japanese movie (and book by Kōbō Abe) that affected me deeply. It was called Woman in the Dunes or Suna no Onna (砂の女). Suna means something like grains of sand, which I metaphorically interpret to be like all the different facets of oneself. The idea of being fluid yet solid, like sand, stuck with me, and so when the time came to choose my own name, that stuck. Like sand on the beach.

I used to be quite the little gloomy existentialist intellectual in the olden days.

By the way, Suna is a given name in other cultures. The source I saw says it’s a female Turkish name meaning “duck.” The cute kind, I’m sure. Ah, upon further reading, it means beautiful and tall, like a drake. I guess since male ducks are prettier?

I saw a lot of ducks today, along with white pelicans, along the Cooper Lake dam.

Or it could be gold, from a Sanskrit word. In any case, a hint of my love for the name comes from the fact that it’s much less beautiful backward. Ha!

I’ve driven that topic into the dirt (another sand reference?) so let’s move on. Today dawned cloudy and gusty. Hiking in that weather is not fun. I did try, and got a couple more plant photographs and bird sounds, but checking the forecast led us to head home sooner than planned.

Rain is forecasted for tomorrow, and Lee didn’t want to take Seneca the motorhome on back roads in bad rain. So we visited the park office, where buying a magnet was quite difficult, then headed out.

This pretty stand of yuccas was one photo I was glad to get. The only ones I saw.

It’s an interesting drive from Cooper to Cameron if you avoid the interstate. There are lots of horse farms (yay) and lots of this kind of thing (ugh).

Proudly declaring to the world he’s Suna backwards.

It was good to be home and get caught up with things back home. It can rain all it wants to now!

A Dream Job That’s a Walk in the Woods

What’s your dream job?

My dream job has changed over the years. If money were no object, I’d teach knitting and crochet part time. I don’t want to be a famous knitting guru like some of my friends; I just want to bring the joy of a lifetime pastime to others. It’s so rewarding.

The temperature blanket for this year is so fun and has purple in it! Cool. Literally.

Nowadays, though, I am getting so much from my time out in nature that it would be a dream job to be a park interpreter. I could lead walks and hikes that show folks how ecosystems work, what plants and animals there are in different habitats, and how to identify what they see, hear, smell, and touch.

I could lead a hike here and show folks all the future wildflowers in midwinter.

I could also teach hiking etiquette. Like, don’t bellow at the top of your lungs and sing rock songs so loud you scare all the woodland creatures for miles, which is what the only other hikers I saw today did. Ugh.

Anyway, we’re enjoying a very peaceful time at Cooper Lake State Park. We are the only people here who don’t work here. It’s glorious and peaceful, probably the quietest state park we’ve been at. Someone was shooting something somewhere nearby and it was SO loud with no other noise around.

It was really cold last night here in northeast Texas, down to 20°. We got in late, and the heater just couldn’t cope. It got down to 58° inside, but I slept so well. Quiet. Once the sun came out, the heater coped and tonight it’s fine.

Because it was sunny and there was no whipping gale wind, it actually wasn’t too bad outside, and I was able to go on a couple of nice walks around this huge lake and the hardwood forest around it.

There were ducks, herons, a cormorant, gulls, greater yellowlegs, belted kingfishers, and more on the lake shore.

The bird highlight for me was getting to see a golden-crowned kinglet close enough to see that little crown. Theirs are way easier to see than ruby crowned.

Woodland birds included lots of crows, blue jays, cardinals, robins, and woodpeckers. The most popular tiny bird was the yellow-rumped warbler, but there were plenty of titmice, wrens, chickadees, and sparrows. Two nuthatches also showed up. Lots of singing and flitting to enjoy. Who cares about the cold!

You could see all the wildflowers and grasses in their winter resting states. There were colorful leaves and berries if you looked carefully, though. I found it fun to try to figure out what the dried flowers and bare trees were. I’ll see how well I did when I put them in iNaturalist.

What didn’t I see? Insects. Not one butterfly showed up. No bees or flies. They’ll be back soon as it warms up again. The little insect-eating birds like phoebes and mockingbirds were busy with other food in the meantime.

I could do this observation stuff for a living with other people! However, wow, it’s nice to do it alone. Traveling without the annoyance of other humans sure is pleasant. I prefer this to cities.

To wrap it up, here are some fun pictures of tracks I found along the lakeshore. There are herons, ducks, little birds, raccoons, and a canine. I didn’t see deer tracks, but I did see deer, so of course they are here!

Should We Abandon the Leader Ship?

What makes a good leader?

I have thoughts on what makes a good leader. I’m afraid that my thoughts are really about what kind of leader I prefer, not who meets some objective criteria of “success.”

Goldie is a firm but fun leader of her pack.

If I need to be on a team or work group, I like to be led by someone who is more of a mentor and facilitates the folks they lead to do the best they can at their job, sport, or spiritual pursuit. They encourage and support, yet provide helpful criticism. They are also willing to do hard things like take responsibility for what the group does and make decisions like who to cut from the team, etc.

I try to be that kind of leader. I’ve had some success and some painful failures at leading volunteers and paid teams. What hurts me the most is when I try to protect my team from unpleasant stuff, but it doesn’t work out. I still feel bad for the LLLOnline team.

Currently I have no intention to lead anything, ever, again, even in a token role. I have abandoned the leader ship and am now a happy team member who has way too much input sometimes. I’m now secretary for two groups I once held more responsibilities in. I like that.

Anyway, I think good leaders show respect and spend more time helping their team do well than trying to get ahead, win, or take credit.

On the Home Front

The tack room at the ranch is getting a much-needed upgrade. We’ve limped along with tarp covering its ancient shingled roof, but the winds in recent days have shredded the latest tarp and blown off more shingles.

So the men of the house decided to replace the roof in a permanent way, with a lovely metal roof that matches the rest of the ranch buildings.

Of course, the weather has not helped much. Both days it’s been worked on have been bitterly cold, and today the gales were coming from the north again. I really felt for those guys slapping big sheets of metal around in that wind! I’m glad they brought in professional subcontractors to do a lot of the work.

I can’t wait to show you the finished product, but it will have to wait until I’m back home. We dragged the RV out to northeast Texas to camp on a big lake. I haven’t seen it yet, since we arrived late. I’ll talk about that tomorrow!

You Can’t Un-Invent War

If you could un-invent something, what would it be?

I saw this question and said, well, this is like going back in time and changing one thing, only to realize the consequences are horrible. Like the butterfly effect?

I first thought I’d un-invent guns. Then I thought that would be too complicated. What about hunting for food? But there are other ways to hunt. I don’t know. Maybe just un-invent automatic weapons and weapons of mass destruction.

Then I mused, well, we wouldn’t need those horrible things if there were no wars. If people lived together peacefully we’d not be fighting all the time.

We could just look at pretty horses. Ahh. I love watching Drew.

But people fight. It’s part of being human. And so much of civilization arose because of conflicts between groups of people. They lead to innovations, migrations, and of course heterozygous vigor. Maybe we’d be a very different species if it weren’t for these tendencies to want to eliminate “the other.” We aren’t alone. Other mammals, birds, insects, etc., do it.

People fight, and horses get annoyed. Drew is not pleased at how much work Tarrin made him do.

So. Screw it. I wouldn’t be able to make war not exist. And if our current weapons went away, we’d have something worse, or just go around poisoning each other. We may do that anyway, clever humans as we are.

I don’t like humans as a concept, I’m afraid. Or in real life, as a whole. I do like the urge to be kind, help each other, and create communities, which I hope is as strong as the urge to eliminate people unlike ourselves. We will see, maybe sooner rather than later.

My apologies that the blogs haven’t been very interesting this week. I’m lacking in writing inspiration. Tomorrow will be more interesting, I’m sure.

Drew had a hard afternoon. He was really scared by construction noise by the tack room when I tried to groom him. I ended up taking him to lessons early so he could relax a bit. It worked. He was only a little squirrelly for me, and Tarrin helped him stretch.

Daily Birds

It was a glorious and beautiful day today. Hard to believe it was 12° yesterday and 70° today. That’s Texas for you. I truly enjoyed standing in the woods surrounded by sparrows, chickadees, and titmice being their most cacophonous selves. Here’s to the tiny birds of the woodlands and their big voices!

The other bird is an intriguing mystery. Every time I go to Tarrin’s Merlin hears an Osprey. I don’t hear it, and I certainly haven’t seen it. I guess there are enough large ponds nearby to support one?

What I did see was this downy woodpecker.

Speaking of Love – and Hawks

Can you share a positive example of where you’ve felt loved?

Woo hoo. Today’s prompt goes with my day’s experience. So, let’s blog.

I’ve figured out that one of my “love languages” is the one about giving time and effort. When someone spends time doing something to make my life better, I feel love.

One example is how incredibly grateful and loved I felt when I came home from a trip expecting improvements to my horse area, but was blown away to see that two portable buildings we had were now a beautiful and large hen house with the interior painted “my” colors and a HUGE new tack room that would hold all my horse supplies and have a sitting area. I was blown away.

Note that they painted the hay storage container to match the building.

Every time I go in either of those buildings I have warm feelings about the two guys in my family who worked so hard on it. They were my son’s first two carpentry projects, so there are imperfections, but they’re charming to me. And I think of the stories behind how they got all the furnishings and built the saddle racks and pegs for halters, etc.

The other time I felt loved like this was when Lee gave me my bird journal. I couldn’t believe he’d spent so much time collecting bird photos then made the book by hand. I get to feel loved every day when I write in it!

He also made this cute book cover for the journal.

Love Birds of the Day

The highlight of my day today was all about love. After making many trips back and forth to the horse trough with water, I decided to go listen to birds for a while. Today got down to 12°F but then warmed up to 45°. That felt balmy!

You probably can’t tell, but the pond iced over.

As I headed towards the woods with my empty water containers, I saw movement. It was the pair of red-tailed hawks I’ve been watching for a few weeks. They were doing an awesome love dance. I was transfixed as I watched them soar and glide, then dive down near the ground and up through the trees.

The only photo I got of them flying. I was too busy watching most of the time.

It was so graceful yet strong. I felt privileged to get to see this up close. It was the closest I’ve ever been to flying hawks. They flew right past me a couple of times. At last, they rested in the trees for a bit.

They are both in this picture. One flying low in front of the trees, one higher, behind trees.

Then, off they went, flashing their wings at me. That made up for the hard work. I loved those love birds.

I made it a loop

PS: thanks to everyone who tells me they read my blog. I feel like the lady on Romper Room (a television show from my youth), who would look in her magic mirror and say, “I see Susie and Donny…” or whoever’s parents had sent her a postcard.

I see you, Mike, Donita, Lory, Libba, Catherine, Barbara, Debi…and so many more!

Clutter, Not My Favorite Word

Where can you reduce clutter in your life?

I will first tell you where I want to reduce clutter: in my head. That goal is slowly coming to fruition as I discard guilt over past mistakes, sadness over lost lives and friends, my endless lists of rules I think I have to follow so my friends and family won’t desert me, etc. (Abandonment issues? Yes, thanks Mom.)

How to cope? Go out and watch deer when it’s 18°.

The last thing is still a big issue. I want to be considerate of others and respect their boundaries and wishes, but I don’t want to constantly second guess myself in deference to others. What topics do I avoid with Person X? Remember not to argue with Person Y! Never mention Person Z by name! It’s a balance. It’s definitely the reason I’m quieter now.

So, yup, I need to sweep out some mental clutter. It’s a good goal.

However. As for household clutter.

I’m not a minimalist. I enjoy having things to look at in my environment that I enjoy. Like I’ve mentioned before, some objects seem to carry a spirit somehow, of people who made them or gave them to me…they have meaning. So don’t tell me my house is full of clutter. I like it that way. If I want to live in a bland hotel I can go to a condo.

At least I keep the birds outside…except for my bird journal. Clutter.

That said, my house bothers me right now because there is mess. To me, mess is stuff with no purpose that is just sitting around waiting for someone to do something about it. There are boxes of yarn I can’t fit in my office closet because it needs to be rearranged to add shelves and such. There are two china hutches in the entryway, because I can’t move the big one so I can empty out the small one and trade things out. There are paintings and needlework that need to be hung. All this is from my Austin house and former office. IRS hard to consolidate.

I should just sleep outside. These guys do.

So I do need to rearrange things, remove what isn’t meaningful to me, and get the house back in order. Oh, and remove magazines that have been read so others can enjoy them.

But there will still be “clutter,” just organized into collections.

It’s too cold for daily birds, but I did see a lot of woodpeckers flying around today. After tonight, the Arctic air will head off and we will be back to more normal winter weather.

I’m still waiting for my yarn to arrive so I can do these extra cold days on the temperature blanket. Yes. Last year’s blanket is now “clutter” until I can attach the segments and photograph it. Soon!

Yes, I Like Horses, Even Cold Ones

What is your favorite animal?

I think anyone who has read a couple of entries in this blog can figure out that I’m fond of horses. I always have been, even though most of my life I had neither the space nor the funds to have any. I’m so incredibly grateful for the chance to work with horses now.

They have plenty of food and water! And of course their new shelter.

Horses have fascinated me since I figured out they existed, but I’ve also loved dogs my whole life. I think regular readers can also figure that out.

I’ve had cats when I lived in apartments, but I had a couple that made me decide I like them better at other people’s houses. Cat pee is not a thing I can handle well. Plus, Lee has one of his many allergies to cats, and outdoor cats don’t last long here due to hawks, owls, coyotes, and guardian dogs.

I could use a barn cat, though. Sigh. Mice are another cute animal I’d prefer not to cohabit with.

It’s the coldest day I can remember here, but we’re coping. I’ve especially enjoyed watching the animals running around in the dusting of snow and/or ice. Penney and Carlton seem to be energized by it, and seem to smell many new smells. Alfred was out all day, since he was made for this stuff. Goldie goes out to annoy cattle but doesn’t seem thrilled. Harvey and Vlassic run out to pee and go back in.

The horses have spent less time in their shelters than I expected. Instead they’ve been eating a little more than usual, as expected, and are playing on the crunchy pasture. As a wise family member has said, they are livestock, after all. They are smart enough to crack the ice in their water trough without my help, too. Huh.

The chickens appreciate their heat lamps, but they are not alone. I was a bit startled when I opened the hen house to get food and leave water for them, because there were dozens of house sparrows in there with them. I startled them, too. everyone flew right out.

No bird photos, because I only took these few outside.

As for us humans, the heater downstairs had trouble coping with these 14° temperatures, but upstairs was great. If only my work area and television were upstairs. We found some oil heaters that came with the horse trailer and put one in my office for my Zoom chats and one by where Lee and I sit to watch football. We have plenty of afghans, so it was cozy enough.

One more really cold day and normal winter will return.

How to Keep Up Online

In what ways do you communicate online?

Greetings from the Polar Vortex where it finally got cold, even way down here in Texas.

We’ve been busy keeping ourselves and the dogs warm

Today’s question is harder than it seems. It forces me to admit something that kind of makes me sad: I’m no longer an internet pioneer. Y’all, I’m even in a couple of books for being an early feminist voice on the ‘net. I made websites before color monitors existed. I had email way before most people did, thanks to being at the University of Illinois.

I helped make online communities before Facebook. So what? Yep. That’s the past. Zzz.

I no longer keep up with things. Twitter bored me, I have to admit. I also don’t enjoy watching videos for very long (amusing since I create them every day at work). So I’m not on YouTube for hours. And I cannot tell you how annoying and boring I find Tik Tok and Reels and social media influencers.

Please enjoy them and tell me about it, though. I am fine experiencing those things second hand.

So. Boring senior citizen Suna communicates online mainly in Facebook and communities there, and by reading and writing blogs.

I text friends and family a lot, and enjoy my text groups with them. Certainly I’m up on Cameron news thanks to that! I also really enjoy online Zoom meetings that started in the pandemic but are now just nice ways to keep in touch with people I used to email a lot. I feel so close to friends all over the place!

Email is there still, but mostly for work or nonprofit stuff. The few email lists I’m still on don’t get much of my attention these days, because I run out of time.

For what it’s worth, that’s that. I enjoy the online communities as much as the in-person ones, though. I like blog comments and interacting with readers, a lot. So thanks to you commenters and silent readers. You know who you are!

It’s too cold to have a daily bird, though I did enjoy looking at puffy sparrows today. It’s supposed to snow tomorrow. I know the chickens are enjoying their heat lamps and the horses appreciate the new shelter. I tested both of them out today!

Our heater is still working, so us humans are coping well with 19° F weather. The heat pump unit got wrapped in insulation, so it’s not failing when it got into the 20s like it used to. We are getting stuff figured out, thanks to the brain power of the ranch commune.

The far left square is today. That’s the coldest day I’ve recorded!

It may snow tomorrow! I bet I take pictures. What do you think?

Road Trips and Staying Put

Think back on your most memorable road trip.

Lee and I have been on many memorable road trips, and I hope we have lots more. We made a lot of memories the time we took our first big RV, Ursula, to New Mexico in 2012. We first visited my friend Steve from grad school and his husband, Guy. They lived in Las Cruces at the time.

The only photo I can find from this trip. There were tons in my old blog.

We did so much in southern New Mexico, and we’re only slightly creeped out by surveillance drones. This was long before Build That Wall. I had the best Mexican food ever and saw so many great rocks. And old Las Cruces!

I got to watch Guy work with his rodeo horses at liberty. It was the first time I ever saw such a thing. Guy was so good with the animals and I guess was good under saddle as well since he had a huge saddle he won at gay rodeo in the house.

Later we drove farther north and went through deserts and forests, saw White Sands and the Malpais. We visited petroglyphs and a trading post we returned to on later trips for my turquoise needs.

Since I have no photos, here’s our woods today.

Other than the RV breaking down, all was well. We need to visit Steve again where he is now that he’s a widower.

We aren’t going anywhere this weekend. We were scheduled to camp, but chose to stay home and prepare for the bad weather that’s coming tomorrow. It’s our turn at last.

Who needs to travel when you can watch horses play?

The highlight of preparation was getting some sides added to the horse pens to add a lot more shelter from the wind and cold. Here’s how it looked before.

I was impressed that they got red metal to make the sides from. I didn’t expect coordination! Here are some in progress photos.

It really looks snazzy now that it’s done, and it’s very sturdy. May as well do it right the first time. Next we will get more covered roof for summer shade and rain protection. There will be gutters! Anyway, here’s how it looks now.

We hope the horses use the new shelter. My guys looked pretty displeased.

Daily Bird

I’m just gonna declare all the sparrows birds of the day, because they were just so cute today bopping around through the trees. I didn’t bother them one bit. Enjoy them.

We’re ready for the cold and maybe snow tomorrow. Hope we got everything safe and snug.

Snacks? Really? Geez.

What snack would you eat right now?

Could the questions get any more trivial? I’m actually full from a delicious dinner of boneless pork ribs slow roasted in my covered baking thing from Pampered Chef. I can’t remember what it’s called but it sure makes good, moist meat.

It’s this thing. I looked it up. It’s a New Traditions Deep Dish Covered Stoneware Baker. Cranberry.

I also had a baked sweet potato and less yummy cooked radishes (they were okay), and mixed veggies I made for Lee.

Perhaps my snack was the bourbon old fashioned I made with bourbon and syrup from the Hilton Head Distillery.

I’ll visit Hilton Head this year but until then, here’s the sky this evening. I was listening to a Great Horned Owl.

That’s as fascinating as I can make snacks. I’m actually not a big snacker. Sometimes I eat snack foods for meals. My big indulgence is Goldfish crackers. Not ideal food. But I don’t do that more than a couple of times a year.

I didn’t have much else to talk about today anyway. It was cold and horridly windy, and the Polar Vortex isn’t even here yet. I can only look forward to using more colors in this year’s temperature blanket than last year’s. Yes! Freezing but pretty!

Animals are fine. I wish you could have seen Fiona directing me to which burs she wanted me to remove first. Her “underarm” area was really bugging her. She’s such a smart little creature.

All the horses decided to eat on top of their “hill” (dirt from digging the pond last year).

Carlton seems no worse for wear after his surgery yesterday. He isn’t licking the incision at all, probably because Goldie is still watching him.

See, I can jump up and ask to be let out of the fenced area!

Better stuff tomorrow, friends.