Yes, What I Expected

Is your life today what you pictured a year ago?

A year ago? I figured the uncertainty and long parade of unexpected setbacks around me would continue. They did. I also figured I’d just stick to dealing with what I could control, and I was pretty successful at that. Honestly, with a pessimistic outlook like that, focusing on the moment and your own business is a good plan.

Twilight of the day, of the year, of this life. All good.

At this point last year I’d already concluded that nothing I do is going to change how people who once loved me treat me now, and that my best tactic is to love the people I love without any limits, just appropriate boundaries. That’s worked, too! Hmm, I’m reminded of the fictional dating service they had on Saturday Night Live called “Lowered Expectations.”

Cactus is living up to expectations!

I decided around this time a couple of years ago to drop expectations of how others will act and to step back from trying to get closer to people I care about. I just go out and be me. That’s truly worked out well, because I’ve felt more welcome and appreciated in my community since then.

I’ll go my own way, with a peaceful heart

I think I’ll keep it up, and keep enjoying the beauty around me and snatching up fun times as they occur. There will be more bouncy houses, I hope!

Speaking of fun, I had a nice brunch this morning with Pouri, and we got to talk a bit. Then I enjoyed an stress-free drive home, even in Dallas. Plano sure looks clean and tidy compared to Cameron. Quite a contrast!

It was also very sunny.

I’m glad to be back with my messy horses and barking dogs (one snoring).

Sleeping Harvey and my elbow.

Did I answer the question? I expected little change for me, personally, but lots around me. That is how it worked out.


Daily Bird

Today Merlin heard a kestrel! That made me happy, because I rarely see or hear them here on the Hermits’ Rest ranch, though I see one all the time down by my neighbor’s place. I guess individuals don’t have a large territory.

They sure are beautiful little birds. I’ve seen them catch food a couple of times and go back to their telephone or electric wires. I wonder what they say on before those were invented? (Trees)

Day or Night, It’s All Right

Are you more of a night or morning person?

Let’s answer this prompt. It’s harmless. I used to prefer nights, back when I did a lot of music stuff and going out with friends. I think I liked the activities, like choir practice and rehearsals more than the fact that it was night.

This is here just because I thought it was pretty.

Now that I mostly stay home, I’ve come to enjoy my morning routine out in the fields and woods. It’s grounding and gets my mind ready to get stuff done. I do enjoy having morning rituals like coffee and filling out my bullet journal for the day, too.

I often meditate while looking at lichen and bark.

I have evening rituals, too, like blogging and reading before I go to sleep. I guess I like to ease into the day and ease back out.

Magazine patiently waiting for me to finish blogging

I enjoyed the distraction of a lesson on Apache this afternoon. I wanted to build on last weekend, and it worked. We are doing well together, and I’m impressed with his eagerness to learn. I’m a lot more calm, too. He’s feeling better.

Next lesson will be for Drew, but it’s been postponed for family stuff. That gives me lots of time to work with them both at home, though. Drew and I have lots to practice, too! He is still weird about his head but otherwise tons of fun.


Daily Bird

I think the great blue herons on the ranch will be upset (or more upset) with me if I don’t feature them, so today’s the day.

It’s about time.

At least today I didn’t scare one who was busily cleaning out the overflow pond like I’d done for two days. I just watched them flying and posing at water’s edge.

I’m watching you.

My favorite thing about these large birds is their croak. They yell when disturbed and made to fly off. Often they don’t vocalize enough for the Merlin app to catch them, but it did this week. It’s a great creaky sound.

I’m glad we have water to attract these and the other herons/egrets here. They have so many postures and look so elegant when they fly. And they’re so big! It’s a nice contrast with all the tiny woodland birds.

Bonus phoebe.

Sometimes Simple Is Spectacular

Send good thoughts our family’s way, since we’re experiencing a loss.

So let’s talk about yarn. Good idea.

I’m like a dog with a bone when it comes to needing to craft during stressful times.

Since I’m still waiting for my pale yellow yarn to arrive so I can get back to the temperature blanket, I’m experimenting. I saw a Facebook post by Lily M. Chin about crocheting a fancy hot pad/oven mitt thing using leftover yarn and a stitch called thermal stitch. This stitch is like double knitting in that it makes a double thickness of fabric.

I liked the looks of it and the idea of making something sturdy out of wool that would be oven safe and protect surfaces if you set something on it. Sounded like a good gift idea, from someone who isn’t buying gifts this year.

I followed Lily’s advice and searched for instructions for thermal stitch. Sure enough, there are plenty out there. I conveniently share the one I used, just so you won’t ask.

My sample swatch I made from two skeins of sock yarn held together. I had a bit of a learning curve since crocheting into the back of one stitch and the front of the stitch in the row below is harder with doubled yarn is challenging. I also was not very good at turning and starting the next row. But the pattern is really pleasant to look at.

Ha ha, I hid my ugly edge.

I decided to make a “real” hot pad/potholder out of one strand. Hanging around in a tote rescued from my former knitting closet happened to be a bunch of beautiful teal blue Lamb’s Pride wool/mohair yarn that many years ago was intended to be part of an extremely complicated cabled sweater. Look at that sideways cable. Note it’s in the round. Check those stitch markers. Ooh fancy.

A partial sweater in light that makes it look green.

Yes, it sure was fancy. I’m not sure why I gave up many years ago, but one reason may be that the weather here in Texas will newer be cold enough here to wear a wool/mohair cable extravaganza, barring the occasional polar vortex. Never fear! I think I’ll make a pillow out of what’s finished.

The yarn. Someone colored on the label.

Mostly I no longer feel the urge to make the most complicated project possible. When I looked at the thermal stitch in this yarn, I saw a beautiful and subtle movement and felt a satisfying thickness.

This shows how thick the fabric is.

Thermal stitch doesn’t have a lot of “give,” so it’s not a good garment choice. But it’s great for household items! Here’s the first one I made. I was still a bit unsure about the edges, and my border idea did not disguise it. I think I’ll erase that.

Functional.

The one I’m doing now has nice edges, so I’ll deem it gift worthy. I have enough yarn to make a third one, so I’ll use the first one myself.

Maybe when the temperature blanket is done I’ll make a large one like Lily Chin did. Hers was long, and folded over at each edge to make holes you can stick your hands in while slipping the main part under a casserole. It was cool. Also, turning it under hides any ugly edges, heh heh.

Photo by Lily M. Chin, used with permission. I like how turning the ends under would hide my ugly edges.

I really like the look of this textured stitch. I’m resisting any urge to embellish it with embroidery or threads running through it to make a plaid. Resistance is NOT futile.

PS: Daily birds will return tomorrow.

The Hippie Takes a Day Off

What are your two favorite things to wear?

I say I’m a hippie, because when I saw the prompt for the day, two things popped into my head: blue jeans and t-shirts. I have had that as my uniform since the day I was allowed to wear pants to school, which I think was in 1971. It sure saved Mom money, so she didn’t argue with me. My clothing budget shrank a lot. And I bought my own shirts.

My avatar wears my usual stuff. Jeans, t-shirt, jean jacket and cowboy boots.

The t-shirts have only changed in that now there are more horses on them and before I had stylized drag racing cars. Peace symbols and flowers have stayed.

The jeans started out straight, became bell-bottoms, got high-waisted and low-waisted and repeated in various ways. Mostly I wore basic Levi’s.

I didn’t catch it, but I did see this goatweed leafwing butterfly today.

Now, on to the day off. I felt so good after a very long night of sleep, that I decided to take it easy today. I spent a lot of time birding, including being startled by the blue heron twice. It’s been picking off fish in the dwindling overflow pond, and neither of us can see the other until we’re on top of each other.

Location of heron.

The other encounter I had came when Carlton and I took a walk in the woods. Suddenly he froze. I think he was trying to point like a hunting dog. We’d come upon an opossum along the stream bed. he must have smelled it, since he doesn’t see well.

Look over there!

Carlton was a good boy and followed me so the animal could go on about its business. It was a good walk the rest of the way. I’m glad I didn’t bring the Mighty Huntress Goldie or we’d have had another bloodbath. Ugh.

Other than enjoying birds, I enjoyed the horses. This morning I caught them at playtime, which involved Drew and Dusty nuzzling then running down the pasture to the pens, rearing and pawing, then running back. Dusty still has it in him! (Pictures are blurry because I was far away.)

Mabel eventually got into the running, but not the rest of it. I’ve noticed that she’s now strong enough to chase off any horse who tries to nip her.

Eventually Apache thundered back and forth until they all gathered around the hay bale. It’s nice to watch them play, and I’m glad they have the space to do so.

Later I spent quality time with everyone, which is always so nice. Drew is a little pissy lately, since his head injury. But the other horses and Fiona were fine. I got all the burs off Mabel, even. I just have to wait until it’s her idea to have a petting session.

No burs!

I had plenty of time to make dinner, and was so relaxed I didn’t even get upset when Dish Network didn’t have the channel where Sunday Night Football was. Lee just went over and set up the antenna he’d bought weeks ago for just such an eventuality. Boom. TV. It comes in great, actually.

I made a potholder or hot pad. It’s very thick, because I crocheted it with thermal stitch.

And yes, I wore jeans and a t-shirt today.

Closeup of stitch

Daily Bird

I’m featuring the orange-crowned warbler today, because I’d never heard one here before, just on one camping trip. I didn’t see it, but I can sure ID one by sound now. It sounded like one of those rhythm instruments you scrape across in Latin music, usually five sets of scrapy sounds.

They only drop by here while migrating, according to the map.

A bird I saw a lot today was the Savannah sparrow. It’s a basic brown sparrow, but it’s everywhere this time of year. It and the pipit make little peeps.

We Made It! 15 Years Married!

It’s significant to me that Lee and I made it to 15 years of marriage. When you get married at age 50 you just hope you get some good years together!

Is the day after the wedding, opening cards. Lee looks like someone I don’t know. We’ve both gone a lot grayer.

We have done so. There have been times when we were both out of work and times when we were doing better than we ever expected. Now it’s medium! I’ll take it.

The emotional highs and lows have evened out, too, and I’m glad for that. It took a lot to get through some of the drama in our families, and that hasn’t changed. We just cope better now.

We’ve both done a lot of soul searching and gotten more emotionally stable, which helps when you have two people who don’t argue with each other well. It’s good to be able to step back and not react to each other’s quirky ways of being upset. You learn that through time.

I think this is the only time Lee has been clean-shaven since I knew him.

Anyway, I’m happy to have Lee to face the coming “interesting” times with. We are each other’s stability, I think.

We went to dinner in Rockdale, the next town over, where there’s a new Italian restaurant off the lobby of a motel. Yep. Small town living. It was excellent and a good change of pace since we still don’t go out much since COVID. All good.


Daily Bird

Today I’m going with the white-crowned sparrow, another friendly winter resident. They’re all over the place right now, with their white-throated friends. They don’t sing as much, but they have a pretty song in addition to a lot of chirping.

Mostly I enjoy watching them in the brush piles scratching for food. The younger ones completely blend in with their surroundings. See if you can find any immature birds in these photos of shiny adults!

What’s My Favorite Animal, You Ask?

What are your favorite animals?

Actually, no one asked this except the daily prompt writer, because everyone who knows me more than as a glancing acquaintance can tell you my favorite animal is the horse, followed closely by and endless parade of dogs.

Mabel laughs at the absurdity of anyone wondering what my favorite animal is.

I’ve loved horses since before I knew exactly what a horse was. My mother wasn’t clear on the concept either, and taught baby Suna that horses said “hee haw” of all things.

That’s re-donk-ulous.

In fact, my most beloved toddler toy was, um, a stuffed giraffe, which I named Hee Haw, and insisted was a horse. I panicked when Mom washed it.

I really loved horses. There are photos of me in a tiny cowboy hat riding my spring-loaded rocking horse and a giant pillow with a plastic horse head modeled after Fury the TV horse. I can’t find a picture of that, but I did eventually have this 1964 book.

By the time I was past the toddler years I already had a collection of porcelain horses, given to me by my Swedish grandfather. He must have had a lot of faith in me not to break them. More have been broken by house cleaners than were broken by me.

This is what’s left.

I drew horses constantly as a kid. It gave me something to do when I was done with schoolwork. No photos of those sad things are available. I didn’t actually know many horses, so they were a little off, even though I stared at my Album of Horses book and repeatedly read Black Beauty. I must have been a tiresome child. I went through a lot of crayons and paper.

Time to pause for the Daily Whine

That tiresomeness hasn’t changed. I still make very annoying word choices (like over apologizing) due to my long-term self esteem issues, which embarrasses me, which makes my dedicated efforts to love myself just as I am even more challenging. huh.


Let’s talk about how I did my best to soothe my soul today.

Even though it was pretty nippy outside due to a biting wind, I went for a nice walk in the woods, since cattle weren’t in that pasture at the moment.

I got to enjoy watching this happy young snapping turtle.

I found a few signs of fall color and enjoyed watching my “secret spring” behind the back pond. It’s not really a secret, but probably only Sara and I have really noticed it. Maybe Kathleen did when she was meditating in the woods. We’re all forest bathers!

There were even a few birds to watch. Now that most of the leaves are off the trees I can see the chickadees, titmice, sparrows, and vireos much better.

In addition to this egret who was checking out the shallow seasonal pools and lots of swirling vultures, Merlin heard a new bird, more than once, even: an evening grosbeak. I’d love to see it.

Anyway, all the dark trees, the bright green rye grass, and wintry blue skies made me relax a bit and got me ready for toting numerous 50-pound bags of horse and chicken feed later.

Ready for work tomorrow.

Is It Instinct?

Do you trust your instincts?

I can’t top yesterday’s blog post, so I’ll just answer the daily prompt.

I’ve always trusted my instincts. I’m intuitive. Besides that, I think I take in cues I don’t consciously perceive that lead me to know what I should or want to do. It’s just how I’m built. I’m not good at deliberation; in fact many bad decisions I’ve made came from overthinking.

Sunset looked like a flag

Sure, things go wrong, but often I learn the most when acting on instinct and getting different results than I expected. You just make the best decision with the information you have at the time. The worst thing is to not do anything at all, so my instincts are good enough for me.

Bug of the day is a young green stink bug. Yep, not green at this stage.

Honestly, as I’ve gotten older I’ve quit believing any predictions, promises, or plans for the future. I’m just going with the flow and not trying to influence the outcome. I’ll learn what I’m meant to learn. That has lessened my anxiety considerably.

Bird watching also helps. I saw the kingfisher catch a fish today!

So yeah, I think my instincts are correct for me and I’ll stick with them.

My instinct today was that I needed to spend some time with my equine friends. So while Drew was being a pain for Sara while she tried to trim his hooves, I hung out with the other horses.

I’m pretty for a brat.

I got burs out of them, which took a while for Dusty. His mane is sparse, but his thick tail was just about all bur. He munched hay and let me work on him. I brushed him, too, which he always likes.

I still manage to get burs in this little tuft.

Mostly I worked with Mabel, though. She’s been on a product called Gut-X for a while and it seems to have done the trick and helped her put on more weight. I’m pleased.

Looks like a horse.

She’d already been getting happier, and now she voluntarily comes up for attention. She let me fix up her tail and much of her mane, but mostly she wanted to be brushed softly and stroked. We spent a long time just being together.

Still has that face only a mother could love.

After I was done, she stood in her pen and yawned over and over. This kind of release is a very good sign in a horse. She’s feeling good, even though one hoof is cracked and her eye had been runny earlier (she got hay in there).

Today’s Bird

Today I saw a bird we all see often, but one I rarely see here at the ranch. It really surprised me, as it was sitting on top of the utility vehicle right next to me as I went through the gate from the house.

The pigeon never moved. Eventually it must have flown off, though. We see doves here (mourning, white-winged, Inca) but not often pigeons. Wonder where it came from?

So Much to Be Happy About

It really was a great day today. I don’t think the weather could have been better, all the animals were happy, and people were nice, too. This was the kind of day I’d hoped to have when I was a kid thinking about when I grew up.

Plus I saw this Queen butterfly on a vitex bush at the local coffee shop.

All my meetings were pleasant today, with good conversation and productivity. I finished a tedious task so now I can look forward to more fun work next week. I even sort of enjoyed a lot of tedious copying and pasting to make a list of every tag ever used in my Master Naturalist blog. Dang.

Fiery skipper on a dandelion

Lunch break was at the coffee shop with Anita, where I had a great coffee and huge salad. We listened to Chris the owner’s spouse talk about music and our mutual love of Ruidoso, New Mexico. Then we got all our talking in. We get to hang out again tomorrow, because I’m going Thanksgiving shopping with her tomorrow (Lee won’t grocery shop on weekends). What a nice break!

Birds flying to their roost at sunset. Cries I think. Or vultures.

After finishing work I enjoyed working with the horses. Drew even let me get some burs off the front of his head! the key was doing it while he ate. Tomorrow I’ll work on it more. But being out with them in the perfect weather was just ideal.

All this, and there were still more burs on him.

Finally, I went to a “hat bar” thing that my friend Courtney held at her store. I enjoyed watching the young woman who decorated the hats and had fun designing one for myself. She put a pansy on it for me.

She burned the image on.

The snacks were unique. They featured a huge armadillo sculpted out of cream cheese and filled with ham dip. It was ultra realistic and took folks a while to get up the courage to break into it. Whoever made it is talented!

Anyhow, the hat thing was fun, though I felt sort of old and in the wrong social group (it was mostly the fashionable young women of town). But there were a couple women over 50, plus two people I knew.

Courtney did some hat burning, too, and was really proud of her leopard spots. She has to be good at it, since half the items in the store are leopard print (note shoes on customer in photo).

I had lots of fun with my friend Jenecia, who was in my Master Naturalist class with me. I hardly ever see her when she isn’t working one of her many entrepreneurial ventures, so getting to just laugh and catch up was nice.

We didn’t have THAT much wine!

I had more fun helping her find materials for her hat than mine, and it came out so cute!

So darling!

My hat had a theme of matching Drew’s tack, as if I’ll wear a hat when working with him. But it’s going to go with lots of my clothing.

And as if the day couldn’t end any better, I walked outside to see all the pretty lights in the town square. Every day Cameron gets a little better.

There. Just wanted to share a good, full day of friends and fun.

Daily Bird

Today’s bird is the belted kingfisher, because I got to enjoy our winter resident as it flew around the front pond today. It seems to make the rounds of the three tanks/ponds near our house, judging from when I hear it. I see it often, too. Kingfishers have such a distinctive shape that they’re easy to spot.

The only other kingfisher I’ve seen is the ringed kingfisher I saw at the National Butterfly Center, which is in the northernmost part of its range.

I like to watch these birds. I can remember the first time I saw one, which was on some river. It must have been in Illinois at the little park by a large creek. I saw it catch a fish! I’ve seen that a few times.

We’re lucky to have one here at the Hermits’ Rest. I think I annoy it by trying to take a photo of it, but it’s because I love it!

Take That, Burs!

What is good about having a pet?

I can answer the prompt and share today’s triumph at the same time. How efficient.

I slept last night and that seems to have helped settle my nerves. I think the kitty therapy I’ve gotten the last couple of days may have helped, too. Spending time with Potato, my son’s purry and substantial cat has been quite calming.

You’re welcome.

What a nice kitty. I’ll be sorry when my pet sitting duties are over, but I still have plenty of animals to exude good vibes and positivity. Yeah, that’s a good thing about pets. They provide companionship with no strings attached. They help you heal.

And thanks to pets, I see lots of sunsets.

You may be aware that I consider cockleburs to be a bad thing about having pets. Now that Alfred stays mostly in our fenced-in area, burs are a horse problem. Mine remain covered. I have a plan to eliminate them once it dries up a little. All manual labor, but they’ll join the bur-n pile. Ha ha.

Today I worked and worked, but made it to the horses before it was too dark. I arrived armed with a bottle of inexpensive sunflower oil. In the tack room I found some great gloves I’d bought with plastic on the palms and fingers. But proof? I was ready to find out.

I resolved to de-bur whichever horse I could grab first. Apache had been all friendly all day long (now that he loves his pill treats), but when he saw the bridle, he stood in mud and sort of dared me to come get him. Rather than slide all over and risk twisting my knee again (I did so yesterday and it still hurts), I turned around and put the bridle on Drew, who was politely standing beside me, encrusted in mud and burs.

Drew is still leery of having his head touched, so he looked awful. It was embarrassing, so I didn’t take a picture. Instead, I got out the tools and removed at least one layer of mud from him. Then I donned the gloves and poured oil on his tail and worked it all around the burs that had it looking like a dog tail.

Sure enough, the burs slipped off nicely and my hands stayed much happier thanks to the gloves. I think I even had fun, a little. In the end, he’s had a conditioning treatment and is all smooth back there. I hope I didn’t do some bad horse management, because I didn’t ask anyone before I rashly did it.

Look, no burs.

There were a lot of burs in that tail!

Then came the hard part, the mane. He wasn’t thrilled about that but was pretty patient. I started from the back and moved forward. Parts of his mane were fine, but some looked impossibly matted. I worried I might have to do some trimming. I was impressed that he let me get all the way up to his ears.

You call that pet therapy??

His head owie looks ok but he’s not interested in me doing much more than taking off surface burs. By that time it was getting dark, anyway. I’ll just let the oil soften his front burs.

His halter is loose because I’d put it on over a mass of burs.

Tomorrow I hope to work on the spotted mud ball known as Apache since Sara is coming to trim my guys.

PS: anyone who thought Drew couldn’t have been kicked in the head by our mini-donkey Fiona will be interested to know that I witnessed him chasing her with his head lowered, like dogs playing. She did, indeed land some solid blows on him. It’s a wonder he has any brains left. And horse brains are little.