community – Page 7 – The Hermits' Rest

Another Kind of Vacation

Driving home from the state park was a depressing reminder of how divided our country is today. Sometimes being a sensitive person makes me too vulnerable to attack ads, negativity, and the spread of misinformation. And when people I care about are sharing the worst misinformation, it’s too much.*

So I was thinking that I can’t control what’s on television and other media, but there are things in my sphere that I can control. So I’m taking a vacation from my Facebook feed. I’ll miss some good news and other personal developments that happen, but I’ll get less agitated.

Maybe honey locust leaves are like gummies for birds. He seemed really mellow. Maybe I need gummies. No! Drugs/herbs are not the solution, ha ha.

I have other ways to keep in touch! I’m sharing the blog posts on my ranch Facebook page, and dog and horse updates on their pages. And people can comment on the blog or email me. Just ask.

They need more than 197 followers. Of course, I haven’t been posting there since I got so busy.

But, I’m not an influencer. I may be an asocial media influencer at that. It will not be a big deal to go away for a while. I just finally hit the point where the benefits of connection no longer outweigh the negativity and hostility from people who mean well.

Fiona agrees that she’s pretty dull, especially when no one posts on her page. I’m guilty.

Other news? Goldie’s biopsy report finally came in. Indeed she had or has osteosarcoma. The best news is that it’s not a highly aggressive or in a one. I guess it’s the least bad kind of a bad thing.

She started licking and messing with her leg where her old hotspot and IV were. So we covered it last night. The vet I talked to today said it needs to able to breathe, so it’s off now and I replaced it with a sock. It’s one that was really tight on me, but is probably too big. We will keep trying.

We have another shirt on her, too. She can lick her incision. Ugh.

I’m okay! I just don’t want to be hammered with partisan politics, name calling, and intimidation for a while. Self care rules, y’all.

Cindy and Cathy take care of each other and rarely argue. Well, as far as I can tell.

Oh yeah: take care of yourselves, Florida friends!

*some great friends I disagree with are sharing factual information that makes me think. I appreciate those perspectives.

Let’s Talk about Support

If anyone reading this isn’t struggling in some way, I’m glad for you, but a bit surprised. These seem to be hard times for most folks I know. And it doesn’t look like things are getting any easier. I vote that we all do the right thing and support each other. Let’s cut each other some slack. Some of us could really use kindness and empathy right now.

Share what’s good in the world. This is a Phoebe.

We got more sad dog news today and are trying to figure out what to do about Goldie’s bone cancer. I needed support and to just talk about it. Thank goodness I have a friend who I can talk to, who’s going through similar canine concerns.

The horse trailer is back, and I was glad to go to lessons again. Yes, I wanted to learn horse stuff, but I also wanted to talk to Tarrin and engage in mutual support about our dogs and other family issues. Talking really helped me think things through, and I hope I was a good listener for her. And of course I loved on her sick dog.

I also loved on Christmas. He’s love-a-bull.

The lessons were good, too. Apache amazes me. He is doing so well and keeps making progress even with time off. He improved on the dreaded side pass (hooray) and was very patient when I worked on posting at the trot. He’s become a real treasure. We have both calmed down so we can learn.

Drew is doing much better with me, too, though he had some challenges today. That lovely filly of Tarrin’s gets him all rattled. At least this time, Tarrin was on him. But he settled down after ground work and was fine afterwards. He just has to grow out of losing focus on his human leaders. it ain’t easy.

He needs to breathe deeply, just like I do.

The horse lessons are so helpful to me, as is the support I get from Tarrin. We have so much in common yet challenge each other. That is what we need right now, to see past our superficial differences to our common humanity.

Find yourself someone to support or to be supportive to. It’s a great counterweight to the struggles and challenges we are going through as humans.

Have a Good Evening, Readers

Today was just fine. Not too hot, had some rain, horses were well behaved, and I saw lots of plants.

Heck, even Mr and Mrs Bluebird of Happiness visited.

Lee and I watched golf on television, because it relaxes me but does have exhibitions of skill. Then we watched the news a while. Then I was outside enjoying the cool-ish weather until time to make a meal with a lot of mushrooms in it. I guess yesterday’s food post made me crave umami.

Note: I’m thankful for my husband and a couple of friends who were there for me today! Good folks.

That’s all I have for public consumption. Sleep well, everyone.

Games People Play

What’s your favorite game (card, board, video, etc.)? Why?

I admit it. I like word games. My two favorites are Scrabble and Big Boggle. No one will play me because I’m a word professional. I’m NOT the best at either game, honest. I’m above average. I’d probably be better if anyone would play with me.

I don’t like the kind of games people play with interpersonal relationships. That’s why I enjoyed today. I spent much more time than usual talking to friends. It was a nice mix of light-hearted stuff and serious conversation. I’m sure glad I have friends to just hang out with sometimes!

This is me getting ready to go out, with a lurking husband. I was trying to show a friend my coordinating ensemble.

After talking with folks and hashing out some of my angst, I’m feeling a lot more balanced and able to act the way my principles tell me to. That made it worth a Zoom call and driving to Rockdale for fish tacos!

I’m calmer than this poor doe who was so rattled by my presence that she ran off quite flatulently. Here she’s resting between gas attacks.

Go off and enjoy your weekend. That’s my plan.

Harmony, Before the Storm

What could you let go of, for the sake of harmony?

I’m pretty tired from moving things to minimize potential tropical storm damage and a bit warm because I’m sleeping in the upstairs bedroom with no air conditioning. I have a fan and an open window, at least until rain starts. So, I’ll answer this blog prompt quickly.

For the sake of harmony I’ve let go of any drive I have to clarify my perspective on things that happen to me. I don’t need to prove I’m right or justified to anyone else. That’s led to a lot of harmony.

I’ve also let go of the desire to have a say in current or future plans that involve anyone other than myself. It’s not worth trying to provide input or ask questions that will come across as nosy. I make my own plans for things that are just my “stuff” and do my best to let people who are affected know. I try, anyway. That’s just how I do things. I don’t need to know what other folks are up to (in general, not making a barbed comment). I just used to be way too curious/interested.

There’s probably more, but it boils down to learning to stay in my own lane, accept changes and new situations as gracefully as I can muster, and let go of expectations. This makes work, community life, and family life much less stressful for me and reduces at least some potential conflict.

And gives me more time to enjoy the weather.

For every situation there’s more than one right solution and it’s not my job to find it every time! And I don’t HAVE to share my opinion so much. That has been hard to learn and I’m not quite as far along as I’d like to be. But since I started out as the annoying student who raised her hand to answer the teachers’ questions every single time, I had a long way to go.

Curious as to what these are? I’ll tell you! They are seed pods of the beautiful pitcher’s leather flower vine *Clematis pitcheri*

Now to keep my phone charged in case we lose power. Beryl should not be too bad this far north. Think about our family on the Texas coast and my Houston friends!

Not a Good Deja Vu

Once upon a time I was in charge of a large flock of chickens that the owners were no longer interested in taking care of. Their coop had a door, but an animal had broken the screening. Let’s just say soon I had a small flock of chickens. Then I had one. Big Red hung on for a few more years.

I got a much sturdier coop and kept a few more chickens. I was down to six most of this year, then something got Bertie Lee. Then Blondie.

When I had seven. We lost the gray one last year.

Last night something got almost everyone else by coming in through their door and getting them while roosting. My fault. The hens liked to free range so I didn’t lock the door to their run. If the dang bobcat wanted them so bad, why didn’t he take them? Or maybe it was a raccoon. Or any other of the many predators we have.

I’ll really miss Buttercup. She and Bertie Lee were the friendliest ones I ever had.

I’m glad we didn’t have an attack like this for four years! But today was bad and made me cry. I’d had these hens a long time. But one is here still, poor Bianca, who can’t take the heat. It’s hard to be a lone chicken like Big Red was. She bonded with Sara’s horses. Either Bianca will do that or the predator will come back.

Circle of life. Blah blah.

If I get more chickens it will be in the fall, when it is cooler. In the meantime I’ll clean the henhouse out really well. Sigh. This past week has been rough.

At least the horses are okay. Apache seemed off yesterday but today he ate his food and took his meds like a champ. And Drew did all his exercises right, paying attention to me, his leader.

Thanks for being a good guy, Droodles. You were even good for your shot.

As icing on the cake, we are sleeping in the RV because our upstairs air conditioner has broken and won’t get fixed until Monday. Oh course, now is the time the bedroom slide decides to not extend so I can’t make the bed. Sigh again.

I’m doing a lot of deep breathing and trying to be kind to myself. I’d hoped to have lunch with friends today to cheer me up, but just one friend made it. I enjoyed a Negra Modelo in honor of Buttercup, Henley, and Billie Idyll and was consoled by Phyllis. I’m grateful to her and all my sympathetic Facebook buddies.

We can get through this stuff together (this means YOU, too, members of my household).

Much Gratitude, Must Express

How do you express your gratitude?

Honestly, I think I’m pretty bad at expressing gratitude, at least to people. And there is SO much to be grateful for, even with the challenges my family and community keep coming up against. The support each of our communities give us can give the strength to make it one more day.

I didn’t take any photos today, but I’ll find some. I saw this beauty yesterday.

I do say I’m grateful, especially to those who help around the ranch, help with animal care, and fix the endless broken things. But no doubt I could say it more and come up with better ways to show my gratitude.

Example: I’m really lucky I can just ask my son to go look at a broken door or ask Anita to help with my screw-ups on the Red House bookings. I’m taking him to dinner and got her a shirt, but they both need to know how much their flexibility means to me.

And just knowing our niece and nephew who live on the ranch with us are there when we need them takes away so much stress. I just hope we reciprocate in ways we can help!

I think I do let Tarrin know how much her work with me and the horses means to me. Her journey has contributed greatly to mine. Mentors who share their growth are to be treasured. I try to share my own growth here, to pass it on!

She’s patient, firm, and kind. It’s a good way to be.

I guess I try to tell people in person how grateful I am for them. And for those I know via social media, I try to express it often. In this world where it’s sometimes hard to find like-minded people in person, having folks who understand your fears and worries to turn to online is invaluable. Thank you, blog readers, too!

This rabid wolf spider has black front legs that almost disappear.

Yes, nature. I also try to express gratitude to the earth and her inhabitants by treading lightly and harming as little as I can. I want to fit in, though as a human being in Western civilization, it’s hard to not take up too many resources.

I let this fellow out. There are more things to eat outside. It’s some kind of wolf spider.

I’m trying to learn to do better, mainly by reading my neighbor Sara’s blog on regenerative agriculture. In fact, you can head on over there and read her post on things you can do now to meet the goals I have been talking about. Hmm. Sara is someone I need to express gratitude toward!

Family, friends, community, mentors, our planetary home…I’m grateful for them all and will strive to make that clear!

Sunday Plarn and Pool

I’m still pretty out of it, so let’s talk about good parts of today. As always, plants, animals, and insects are good, even the differential grasshoppers, who lurk everywhere to surprise me.

Hi. Am I bothering you? No? Let me go crawl in the chain on a gate so you’ll have to move me and my buddies.

Even the birds are feeling the summer heat. I enjoyed watching these Brown-headed Cowbirds today. They were making their weird gurgling noise.

Say what you will about them, but they sing prettily

The chickens and horses are feeling the heat, too. Poor guys.

Bianca won’t come out of her puddle to join us.

I spent much of the day doing chores, cooking, and knitting. I made a couple of plarn discoveries. I need a crochet hook to help me pick up stitches along the edges when I start a new segment. Also, “throwing,” or English knitting is easier than Continental knitting when your yarn is plastic.

I haven’t finished the first ball of plarn yet, but it’s getting bigger. The plarn maker just randomly put in different colored bags, so it’s coming out quite random.

I still don’t know what this is. I may make it sorta big and use it as a camping mat.

My hands are holding up okay (weaving is tempting me nonetheless) but I’m still going to alternate with my Temperature Blanket, which is easier on my fingers. Speaking of which, we made it through June without any 100° days! But they’re coming.

And the air conditioning upstairs needs fixing!

Anyway, the day ended with a nice meal “cooked” by me (frozen lasagna and salad) and lots of time in the swimming pool with our camping buddies Mike and Martha. I’m glad the pool is still working. Long story behind that. and I’m glad for friends you can talk to about pretty much everything. We’re lucky!

What Are Friends For?

What quality do you value most in a friend?

I can forgive a lot of things in my friends. I don’t expect them to be perfect or nice or generous. What I appreciate the most is that my real friends like me the way I am and don’t put me down.

I never want any more “friendships” with conditions on them, where I have to act in ways that don’t feel genuine, or that are based on what I can do for them. I’m fine with that.

And I will remind myself that, with very few exceptions, your coworkers are not your friends. They are people you are cordial with to make getting your work done bearable. (Bear in mind that I married a coworker (twice), became a business partner with a coworker, and still call a former coworker my dearest friend.)

I just need some people in my life I can be myself around without having to walk on eggshells or pretend I’m someone I’m not. And I’m very uninterested in hearing how I should behave, why people don’t like me, or that I’m not woke/unwoke enough. Those folks aren’t in the friend zone anymore.

I don’t need many close friends for a happy life. I have just enough. And interacting with my informal friend groups and like/minded acquaintances can let me have lots of fun—I just have to be more guarded in the larger circle. That’s probably true for most of us.

And I still care deeply for so, so many people I don’t know well or who may not think all that much of me. I just care about folks.

More storms today. Just wind again, though

I am fortunate to have a few very accepting friends, though, and not all of them are dogs and horses! Thanks, friends!

What a Scary Weather Day

Yikes. Today started out just fine. I got a bunch of work done, then in mid afternoon Lee and I drove to Waco, with me doing my meetings and stuff. Have laptop, will work. Lee was called to Federal Jury Duty, and wanted to check out the courthouse before tomorrow and not have to get up quite so early.

As we drove, we started getting severe thunderstorm warnings. I still had time to check out the lovely river area near the Waco Hilton. They’ve done a great job!

As I was taking pictures of urban birds, I heard thunder. So I went inside and we went downstairs to eat dinner. That was a good idea.

It started to rain, and it got as bad as rain gets in a hurricane, along with similar winds. It was quite a show outside the restaurant windows. Then things went downhill when the kitchen had to stop making hot food, then some roof collapsed in the convention center part of the building. Water was pouring in.

We only had a couple of power glitches. Unfortunately it was not as good back at home. The hospital where Kathleen is staying went on generator power and moved all the patients into the hallways. She said there was a bit of chaos and screaming when the big hail came. They had 80 mph winds.

At home it was bad. Our house, family members, dogs, horses, and chickens are fine. Many trees are down and water was over the roads. Luckily everyone got home safely. My chicken pens blew away. The pool, which had just had a repair today, is full of lawn furniture and a greenhouse frame. But that’s nothing.

Roofing blew off the cabin where my son lives, and the material covering their patio is now in Sara’s horse pen. Glad we have the RV where they can stay until repairs are made. A tree fell on Sara’s horse trailer, and Mandy’s balcony rail is gone.

It was a mess. What is good, though, is how we all checked up on each other. My friends, family, and even the insurance agent/friend started texting and offering to help each other out. It really made me feel safer and like I belong. Plus I was so worried about everyone!

I haven’t heard from the people in our Red House Airbnb. There are so many trees around it that I get worried. Someone will check tomorrow. I just hope we don’t get much more rain tonight.

There IS something more positive out of today! Lee’s trial got canceled, so he doesn’t have to go in tomorrow. I may be able to visit a friend in the afternoon, since tomorrow is my extra early work day. And Lee met the lady who is the court clerk and she told him our planned vacation in a couple weeks would excuse him from the next trial. He still might have to go at the end of June, though. It’s our duty to do this service, so Lee is happy to do so.