Two dear friends had surgery today. These women have given me great support, encouragement, and caring in the many years I’ve known them. They are two of the most thoughtful and loving people I’ve ever met, so naturally they were in my thoughts today.
A flower for Mary and Ruth.
I told my husband how relieved I was when I heard they were both home and starting the next phases of recovery. He probably thinks I’m a bit bonkers for caring about so many of my old colleagues from the nonprofit years, but we went through so much together. I owe them my loyalty as so many have been so good to me.
The way I thought about my friends all day made me muse about how handy it would be if I had some sky dude to pray to. But even when I tried to pray as a child, I always thought God would get more of a feeling than my laundry list of specific entreaties. Nonetheless I find myself doing my pagan Buddhist version of sending out Lovingkindness aimed toward the West Coast of North America, where my friends are. I just feel it in my bones that positive intent has an effect on us.
No doubt humans have an instinctual drive to try to make things better for friends and family. And for all I know the vibes I send out may help. They help me, at least, to feel connected. I’ve heard that people recover better when they know others are cheering them on, but I’m not sure. I can hope!
I cheered these Cattle Egrets.
Perhaps if folks spent more time sending positive energy and good intent out and less time blaming others for sickness, natural disasters, and all that, we’d start to think and behave differently. To make the world better takes more than thoughts and prayers, of course, but if it leads to action, maybe humanity could slow the downward spiral we and our planet are in.
Save the big ole swamp rabbits!
I’m off to beam out healing vibes now. Good night.
Whenever I start to go in and on about my pessimism it makes certain beloved relatives worried. When I realized that this afternoon I began to muse about how okay I’m actually doing right now. I guess if things have to get scary for those of us not in power, now is preferable to even a few years ago, for me. Spiritual growth is a big help.
Lee says a giant porch chair is a big help.
It’s taken a long time to get to where I don’t panic and start feeling paranoid. Even if “they” were out to get me, it wouldn’t hangs who I am or how I act. Like a friend mentioned in response to yesterday’s post, I’m going to choose to be kind. I’m also not going to give up my ethics and morals. Not panicking doesn’t mean not doing the right thing.
By the way, porch furniture came mere minutes after my son finished the beautiful trim work. He did so well.
(Aside: more than one person I know called their representative today and talked to a real person.)
Look at that fine detail. Craftsmanship!
Anyway, I’m coping well, my anxiety only pops up occasionally, and I’m enjoying my little hermit life. I’m staying in my lane, not asking questions of anyone who’s not wanting to share with me, and enjoying the heck out of my tiny circle of friends and loved ones, dogs, horses, and fowl. That, and birds, is enough to create a peaceful oasis.
This excellent hammertail robberfly was my nature fun of the day.
Please remind me of my peace when I start whining about being lonely, left out, or missing old friends. It does happen. Those I care about are in my heart! That has to be enough.
Carlton helps!
And all of you who read and comment and share your stories with me are also in my heart. Thank you for showing all of us how much good and caring for others there still is in the world.
The people who tell you to get rest and drink a lot of fluids when you’re feeling sick know what they’re talking about. After a couple of days of a sore throat and congestion I gave in to the fact that not only Lee is under the weather. I caught the latest mystery virus.
We spent all day under the beautiful storm clouds.
Once I accepted the situation I decided to be kind to myself and rest today. Tarrin fit me in for my riding lesson later in the week, so I didn’t push myself to do all the prep work and riding that entails. My only scheduled activity was a Zoom meeting for Annual Meeting field trip planning, which was easy to do sitting down.
This Hackberry Emperor was on the porch, so I didn’t exert myself to photograph it.
It helped that it rained a while, so I just wrote stuff and drank hot beverages. That was most of the day.
I did spy on the Barn Swallow nest. Still just eggs. Wonder where a Guinea fowl feather came from?
Admittedly, I’m still not as good at loafing as I was when younger, so I did take two long walks to enjoy the pleasant weather after the rain.
These clouds have a lace edging.
I thought I was taking it easy, but I got 39 minutes of exercise and 10,000 or so steps in. Plus, I cooked dinner, an easy one, but still…
These views helped me forget feeling sick.
I’m not very good at resting. And I’m nowhere near as sick as Lee, who’s still having chills and congestion and all that. Thank you, immune system, for being so hardy! Combined with my somewhat restful day, I may already be feeling better.
I saw this while convalescing on the new porch watching the sparrows flying in and out.
All in all, it was a perfect day to watch clouds and a perfect evening to watch the Strawberry Moon. Days like this make living in the moment easier.
Yesterday I did have fun, but was glad most of our fun was had in the car. I felt okay in the morning when I walked around but started to have tummy trouble after we got going. Ugh.
Eastern Tiger Swallowtail
Still, the drive between High Point and the Great Smoky Mountains National Park in North Carolina was beautiful.
We got to drive a good ways along the Blue Ridge Parkway. If you’ve never done this, put it on your bucket list. The mountains are so perfect, and there are waterfalls to enjoy. We were so high up that the trees hadn’t completely leafed out and many were flowering.
On the way
Speaking of flowers, when we made a stop along the way, I was captivated by the beauty of the mountain flowers, especially the trilliums. I could have stayed a long time, but the restroom called. Yuck.
Large white trilliumTwo-leaved ToothwortWild geraniumYellow FairybellsRed trillium
We finally got to the actual Park headquarters where we enjoyed the facilities and bought warm shirts. I was not prepared for temperatures in the low 50s. But that’s fine. My new sweatshirt is nice and soft.
Shirt says Great Smoky Mountains National Park
We visited an old gristmill, where we also saw the first of many elk. They have volunteers who keep people from getting too close to them. Many were tagged and appeared to have been shaved.
It’s an elk
The mill was fascinating and the plants around it were also fun. It was hard to hear birds for the water splashing. But that’s fine!
I believe Lee feels this one. Mountain Doghobble. Great name. Gristmill scenes
After that we mostly drove through spectacular scenery, but we did pull over so I could walk a little way on the Appalachian Trail. More delightful plants and some good birds were there. If I had felt better (and Lee hadn’t kept saying, “Come on, Sweetheart” in a tone that hinted he wasn’t feeling too sweet), I’d have lingered.
Should I stay or should I go?Stomach says stay. Must have recently changed to a Cherokee mane. A red trillium that’s white. White clintonia Spring beauties Hobblebush. They do a lot of hobbling here. Violets! AppleFascinating shining firmossSmooth shadbush The way out
We had to take another break back at the headquarters, and this time it wasn’t me delaying us. Lee took pictures of a herd of elk with the good camera, which enabled me to look for more birds and enjoy a woodchuck.
This one looks sicklyForgot to mention we saw this guy!
We enjoyed the rest of the drive as well. First we went through the Cherokee Nation for a while. Then it was just scenery. The road went along rivers that are popular whitewater rafting and kayaking places, plus a huge lake. It was a bit of a challenge figuring out what we saw, due to no cell reception. I do know we saw a flume and a scenic railroad route.
Scenes of travel
By the time we got to our stop, it was almost 9 pm. I felt bad that it was too late to contact my relatives in Tennessee, but I was so crampy I couldn’t have had fun. I guess the fun the night before messed me up. I assume we will be back by again. I could do that drive again! Enjoy these bonus tunnels and other park scenery.
I took some medicine once we got to the hotel, and slept well. We got out fairly early and got to Lookout Mountain at a great time for photography, when the fog had lifted and the sun was still soft.
The hotel even had a nice viewViews on Lookout Mountain, where I went every summer in my youth.
I had to get my traditional photo of me with the cannons at Point Park. The first one taken was when I was an infant, which was around 67 years ago. Hooray for tradition.
Me and the Civil War cannons
There were plenty of birds and plants to enjoy and I got two new, the Veery and the Blackburnian Warbler. Veery cool.
Click image to see the birds.
I’m sorry I miscommunicated and didn’t get to see Cousin Jan and that we weren’t able to see my Chattanooga cousins. I wish I were a better planner.
More doghobble. Because it’s cool.
No more relatives to miss from now on, just relatives who want me to come home and do my own dang chores (I will!). Wonder where we will end up today?
Weirdly, the temperature range today was just five degrees. That made for an interesting square in my temperature blanket with two shades of yellow for the low and high temperatures Fahrenheit.
We had a couple warm days this week (Orange is when I start to sweat (85-89°)).
The reason for this stasis is that we finally had a good rain front come through, which hadn’t happened since last month. People south of us got much more, but we are closing in on an inch here, which will at least moisten the parched wildflowers and raise the levels in the ponds/tanks a bit.
More is predicted for tomorrow, so I’m hoping Mother Nature will be kind to us, even though the rain made Dusty and Drew go into wild stallion mode all day. So much rearing, kicking, and neck snaking has to be hard on them both.
Drew does not get the message
To top the day off, we lost power right as I was getting ready to cook dinner. I set the last pot on the stove and was about to cut up onions when the power started to flicker. After about ten minutes of that, the lights went off for a couple of hours. I’d say that forced some downtime but that’s not true. I took a walk in the rain with the big umbrella and was rewarded with the haunting sounds of Upland Sandpipers, followed by much ado from a Greater Yellowlegs, another shore bird with an unforgettable sound. The rain had it pretty excited.
The horses were quite concerned at the sight of me with the unfamiliar umbrella. High alert!
After a candlelight hamburger dinner, the power came back so Lee could get back to bookbinding and I could finish my crochet squares. This domestic tranquility reminds me that there was a good event this morning.
It involves me.
Yes, this morning I was reading email in bed, when I heard dog footsteps. I looked, and Carlton and Penney were both in the bed. What?
I was being good. Just like this, only in bed.
It was Harvey. He’d made it upstairs, which he’d only tried twice before, since his stroke or whatever happened. But there he was, happy as he could be. The important thing is that after I got dressed and went downstairs, he came down in his own. Lee heard it, and he said it sounded more graceful than last time. I guess his liver medication is helping (it costs more than any of our human medicine).
It’s good to see Harvey helping Alfred guard the premises.
I’m hoping for more rain, then for a nice clear Saturday, assuming Apache and I are healed up enough to do the show. He seems fine. My shoulder is messed up, which may have something to do with the hoof-shaped bruise on my upper arm. I’ll live, I’m sure!
No wonder my arm hurt yesterday.
My shoulder isn’t too bad, anyway. I managed to lift 40-pound bags of alfalfa and salt that the previous horses needed. I’m a strong older person!
Enjoy this bonus ground cherry, which is undoubtedly happy with Ma Nature tonight!
You may have heard that Goldie left this world today, about five months after her osteosarcoma ordeal began. The good news is that she didn’t really slow down until this week, and only got really bad today, not eating, having trouble standing, etc.
The three of us here at the ranch worked together to give Goldie a good last day. after many calls, the guys found a vet who would come here so she didn’t have to be hauled in and out of cars. I sat with her for the last hour before the vet arrived, with her head on my lap or in my arms. It was very peaceful and loving.
It was important to me that she have peace. I have had too many traumatic dog passings. I don’t want more if it can be helped. We knew this was coming, so we could prepare.
Describing what a special dog Goldie was is difficult. People say all Great Danes are sweet dogs. That may be so, but this one felt like a friend, a confidant, and a guardian all rolled into one.
She was a Mighty Huntress of skunks and armadillos, she was a goofy dinosaur head when she got excited, her tail was a danger to men of a certain height, and she looked at you with those golden eyes, so full of love…
Goldie through the years
The few years we had with Goldie weren’t enough. But that’s what she had for us. We will treasure our memories.
Goldie’s memorial bonfire, next to her very deep grave. Digging big holes is a good way to process grief.
I’m still feeling old and irrelevant, just like my cousin J. And I’m incredibly sad to be watching my sweet Great Dane, Goldie, swiftly declining. Cancer is just awful. It makes me hesitant to have another giant dog.
Just sunning herself.
And cancer is why I can’t tell you what my mother was doing at my age (pushing 67). She’d been dead four years, thanks to her nicotine addiction. I wish she’d had a less addictive personality. I know she loved us.
I was born, born in the 50s. I already look concerned.
When Dad was 66 I think he was at his happiest. If my memory is correct, he’d met my stepmother and was having fun hanging with friends, traveling, and working in his beloved flower gardens. What a contrast. Dad was great taking care of Mom. He deserved a time to have fun. (He married Flo, a woman just like quirky Mom only without addictions, so he had challenges later!) I loved my dad so much. What a great, flawed, very human human being he was.
It’s cold, very cold.
Things sure are different for me. My parents grew more prosperous and felt safer as they aged. Boomers like me had no idea what they’d be in for as they grew older. This is not the future I’d envisioned.
Harvey says he’s hanging in there.
Thanks to everyone who’s been reaching out. Knowing I have kind people in my life is a source of comfort.
Today Dr. Amy came by with Goldie and Harvey’s test results from her last visit. As we expected, Harvey still has liver cancer. He’s doing okay on his medicine.
I’ve lost weight but I’m still eating and barking.
We were saddened to learn that, as we suspected, the bumps on Goldie’s shoulder are more osteosarcoma. But it’s not all bad. The first thing Amy said after telling us the news was, “Look how happy she is.” Goldie was bounding around, thrilled to have a visit with her medical team and get those stitches out.
I’m still here. Full of love.
Yeah. She’s still happy, bouncy, and barky. She gets to live as long as she feels okay. We know what signs to look for. Until then, our dear girl gets to be loved on and treasured.
In other and happier news, Apache and I did well again today. I got him cantering around and Sara took a video. We look competent.
Even when Apache gets annoyed, we still work together. That’s what’s so rewarding. We are learning hard new stuff, and even though it’s a challenge, we’re in it together. I can’t believe he can canter under saddle, too! In the rain!
He did it. Not thrilled.
I also had a good conversation with Sara, since we did our lessons together. I appreciate her loyalty and understanding. I’m not easy to be friends with, and past me was worse! Growing and learning, we are!
See, I can do it.
It was a very long day, mentally and physically and spiritually. I think the hard things make the beautiful things more treasured.
Apache remembers his old stance when he’s irritated. So do I. I tense my neck just like that.
Today seemed really long, probably because I twisted my back at some point when getting the RV ready to head home. I’ll take some pain medicine when I go to bed, for sure.
Or I could hypnotize myself by looking at my nails.
I’m surprised I got any other exercise today, because we spent the morning inside. First, we chatted with Mike, who’d been working in his RV all weekend. But at least we had a quiet neighbor! Then I took minutes for a board meeting of the Master Naturalist chapter. Visions of COVID times danced I my head trying to do a meeting on FaceTime. But I did it!
Made me feel squirrelly. And probably annoyed the attendees.
I enjoyed a small walk, listened to birds, and hugged a cypress tree, typical Suna things.
Magnificent treesBye-bye RiverI tried to hug this immense cypress treeThis is an extra-large Great Blue HeronLittle bird. Ruby-crowned Kinglet?
The ride home seemed extra long since my back was still spasmodic and my stupid eye twitch was back making me irritated. The good news is I found my temperature book, so I got caught up to today in the 2025 temperature blanket. I even sewed the first two rows of January together. It vaguely resembles a calendar now.
January 1-11
The moon rose and sun set as we approached Cameron, which was a good distraction!
Milam CountyApproaching Cameron Moonrise through a dirty windshield Heading down our roadMoon at the ranch
The dogs were so happy to see us when we got home! Alfred was prancing around like a giant puppy, Goldie was managing to jump up and down, and the others were running into each other with glee. Before I could head to relieve myself, they all had to be petted. I sure feel welcome.
Sigh. Goldie has new lumps around her right shoulder. Dr Amy removed one that wasn’t attached to anything, and got a sample of the others. We will get those results in a week or two.
We knew this was coming, but had hoped for more time with her. As it is, she’s acting cheerful and dealing with her many staples just fine. We just can’t let this wound get infected. At least it’s smaller.
Not thrilled to be demonstrating her latest wound.
She can’t catch a break. Her hair had just finished growing in from the last surgery. As long as she is living a good life, we’ll keep pampering her. Such a good girl; she deserves all the love we can give her.
Meanwhile Harvey got blood tests to check in his liver and it was determined all his lumps are lipomas, which aren’t too bothersome. He also had the classic swollen anal gland, everyone’s favorite dog malady. He was pretty sad when his anesthesia was wearing off, weaving and wobbling around, but soon was his regular self, with shorter toenails (yay).
The wound is smaller than it looks. It has salve on it.
I love the dogs so much, but I warn you to consider veterinary costs if you get giant dogs or have a lot of them. The team that works on the dogs are kind and competent, but not inexpensive. Having the mobile service IS really convenient, though.
Lee is Dog Man
At least the horses are currently ok, though huddling up in the cold appears to have led to some bickering. Apache is a real hoot vacuuming up his medication in the senior feed. Meds time is now his favorite time of day.
I don’t want my healthy food and supplements. I want Dusty’s gourmet senior feed with no molasses. I scoff at Apache. And I will eat his alfalfa, no problem. I just wander around chasing the donkey away from food. Everyone needs a hobby.
Next up? Figuring out if we still get to go camping or not. I’d feel a lot better if someone was home this weekend. of course, bad weather may make the decision for us! I hope it’s not too cold for the farrier tomorrow, too.