family – Page 8 – The Hermits' Rest

What a Sap

What positive emotion do you feel most often?

Yeah, it’s sappy, and awe came in a close second, but I am positive that the positive emotion I feel most often is love. I’m always feeling love for something or someone. Not romantic hormonal love, but more the enduring emotional attachment kind of love.

Apache feels great love for his food dish, most days.

Today was farrier day, so I spent a long time with the horses again. I feel so much love for each of them (and Fifi), and it’s different for each, like a mother’s love for her children. Tarrin said she liked how I speak kindly to my horses…and I do get sorta blubbery around them. They may not understand my words, but they can discern my feelings.

Fiona wants you to know I laughed at her for stepping in her food bucket. She’d been picking it up and banging it against the gate like a prisoner asking out of jail.

Mabel got lots of love today, because she was the calmest she’s ever been getting her feet done, and she was able to stretch her legs out and put them on the stand, which means she looked pretty darned good for her by the time he was finished!

Of course, I don’t spend all my love on horses. I get all gooey over my favorite plants and birds, and of course, the dogs. They each hear how much I love them ALL the time. It just comes out. I even love Alfred at his most shedding time, which is now.

Clouded Skipper on a clump of Alfred hair that wafted across the lawn.

There’s just so much joy that the dogs bring! And they love us back, too.

And of course, I feel love for so many people, most of whom may not realize it. I feel all warm and fuzzy at friends’ Facebook posts and Instagrams. I just beam inside when listening to friends talk. They are all so special to me! What a sap.

Then there’s my spouse, who loves to take photos of me chewing. I love him anyway.

I know Lee loves me, because he drove me to the Austin airport today and dealt with the dreaded “Austin traffic.” But we got a cool upgraded room with a couch in it, so he’s happy (he sleeps better in couches or recliners than beds). The Hilton at the airport used to be the HQ building at Bergstrom Air Force Base, and is circular. I always enjoy staying here.

Bonus: I felt more love when I looked over at the bar after dinner and saw my former Austin hairdresser and his husband! That was such a happy moment. We got all caught up on each other’s lives and travels. It makes me feel like a native when I run into people like that!

Off to sleep so I can zip back to another time zone tomorrow! I’ll make sure to check for typos in the post title before publishing, unlike yesterday.

Gotta Admire Teachers

What profession do you admire most and why?

I truly admire teachers, and not just because I’ve taught adults most of my life. Teachers can be so important in the lives of their students. It’s not what they teach, necessarily, because public school teachers have so many weird-ass restrictions placed on them and so many useless tests to teach to.

I have more opinions, but I’ll just share a picture of our house from the road.

It’s the relationships teachers can build with students, the mentoring, and the important role they can play in helping students learn critical thinking skills (if allowed)—that’s why I admire teachers, especially high school teachers. Mine meant a lot to me.

I was admiring the moon when I saw a pretty Blue Grosbeak. No photos.

I’m proud my estranged son is a high school teacher. I know he’s making a difference in many lives, and is a good example of how not all Texans fit the stereotype. Students often don’t see adults unlike their own families outside of school.

I’d say more, but it would be my usual blather. You can just imagine it.

Hope you enjoy my photos.

Not Very Traditional

What traditions have you not kept that your parents had?

It’s a slow news day here at the ranch, so I’ll answer this one. My parents didn’t have many traditions that I can think of, so it’s a little hard to come up with them.

Ah, Easter is a non-tradition for me. Aren’t we a happy 60s family?

I remember they always had a drink or two before dinner. So we always ate later than some of my friends. The drinks were usually vodka and grapefruit juice, but that changed later and Dad had scotch and Mom had morphine. Anyway, I don’t do that. I have wine occasionally before/during dinner and bourbon and an ice cube after. But not all that often.

I do like wine, just not being tipsy anymore (Pexel image)

My parents both thought smoking made them look cool. Dad did look distinguished with his pipe and Mom was elegant with her cigarettes until she wasn’t. I have memories of her vacuuming my room while smoking and leaving long ash caterpillars on the floor. I’d have to re-do it. Mom tried. She had an addiction issue. Watching her die was enough to make me never want to smoke anything, especially since I’d already had so much second-hand smoke that my lungs were weakened. So, not keeping that tradition.

Mom’s floating around up there giving me advice.

They did have a tradition I liked, which was walking the dog (Pumpkin, whom I’ve mentioned before) every night after dinner. Since they were already tipsy, it meant for fun neighbor conversations. I’d walk the dog every evening if I had fewer dogs and a sidewalk. But it was nice and got Mom out of the house while she was sick.

I’d go cuckoo without the dogs. This is an actual cuckoo I saw today.

Damn, that was a downer. I bet this question was supposed to be about holidays or something.

This cheers me up. Squash soup with garlic chives and bread. So good.

Oh! A tradition I wish I’d kept up was having a beautiful garden and propagating plants. Mom was great at hybridizing camellias and daylilies. She grew beautiful orchids in later years. Dad was a great garden designer and loved to keep his lawn and flower beds perfect. I never have been that good or patient with plants but I sure enjoyed watching Dad. He was a great edger.

I just look at plants in case there’s a cool insect on them. That’s a dusky-winged hoverfly.

I guess I sort of maintain the plant tradition with all my native plant observations and how hard I try to protect them. There, I kept one.

Mom was crafty like me. I’ve also kept that family tradition going. This is the border of my sweater. Meh. Maybe it will look better when it’s done.

By the way, new to the Hermits’ Rest website is a page listing all the fungi I’ve identified on iNat.

The Good Stuff: Equine Edition Plus

A little wiped out so I can’t write something long about comfort. So I’ll be brief but positive! This blog needs that, don’t you think?

I’m just pleased as punch to be able to announce that I’m in the best relationship yet with both my horses. That’s taken a lot of work and patience, but sure feels good. I’m glad my trainer works hard and is patient, too (plus she cares).

These are her filly and new calf. They have become playmates. It is extra cute.

It’s become a true pleasure to work with Apache. Funny story: I asked Tarrin if maybe something was wrong with him, because he’s been acting so laid back and agreeable. She laughed and said maybe I’m meeting my horse for the first time. He finally feels good and is showing his friendly and fun personality all the time, and he’s calm. We’ve both come a long way in that department. Dang, it’s fun to get better together.

I don’t have a photo of him today, so here are two more friends. They are good to each other.

And Drew is back to the horse I enjoyed so much before. Whatever he was angry about has passed, and he seems to feel better, too. I guess his shots are helping. I’m enjoying him rather than just working with him because I’m supposed to. I guess we figured things out.

Me riding Drew wherever I ask him to go. It was fun.

The good stuff plus today was that I managed to actually bring myself to reach out to someone about how bad I’ve been feeling lately. She listened, came up with ideas, and made some plans. It just felt good to explain how I feel and be listened to. That’s all I needed.

I’m going to have to find something fun to do this weekend, because we aren’t going camping as planned. The bedroom slide isn’t working in Seneca (Tarrin’s son looked at it but the easy possibility of a loose wire didn’t pan out). And I don’t want to leave the animals alone with just someone feeding them. At least I can ride the horses. My friendly, well behaved horses!

This female roseate skimmer reminds us that some change is good.

Harmony, Before the Storm

What could you let go of, for the sake of harmony?

I’m pretty tired from moving things to minimize potential tropical storm damage and a bit warm because I’m sleeping in the upstairs bedroom with no air conditioning. I have a fan and an open window, at least until rain starts. So, I’ll answer this blog prompt quickly.

For the sake of harmony I’ve let go of any drive I have to clarify my perspective on things that happen to me. I don’t need to prove I’m right or justified to anyone else. That’s led to a lot of harmony.

I’ve also let go of the desire to have a say in current or future plans that involve anyone other than myself. It’s not worth trying to provide input or ask questions that will come across as nosy. I make my own plans for things that are just my “stuff” and do my best to let people who are affected know. I try, anyway. That’s just how I do things. I don’t need to know what other folks are up to (in general, not making a barbed comment). I just used to be way too curious/interested.

There’s probably more, but it boils down to learning to stay in my own lane, accept changes and new situations as gracefully as I can muster, and let go of expectations. This makes work, community life, and family life much less stressful for me and reduces at least some potential conflict.

And gives me more time to enjoy the weather.

For every situation there’s more than one right solution and it’s not my job to find it every time! And I don’t HAVE to share my opinion so much. That has been hard to learn and I’m not quite as far along as I’d like to be. But since I started out as the annoying student who raised her hand to answer the teachers’ questions every single time, I had a long way to go.

Curious as to what these are? I’ll tell you! They are seed pods of the beautiful pitcher’s leather flower vine *Clematis pitcheri*

Now to keep my phone charged in case we lose power. Beryl should not be too bad this far north. Think about our family on the Texas coast and my Houston friends!

Americana Listening

What is your favorite genre of music?

I guess my experience with being in a vocal trio with a Kerrville Folk Festival devotee, volunteering at a monthly folk coffeehouse for years, and living with a rock/country guitarist for three years or so doomed me. I became pretty fond of Americana music. What’s that?

I’m lucky to have lived in Austin, Texas (or thereabouts) for 30 years or more. There is a lot of Americana music to watch. I watched and listened to a lot of it with my music friends. I loved this part of my life.

Oddly, I don’t listen much anymore. I think it has to do with the loss of my older son, who is a wonderful mandolin player (he’s not dead, just refuses to speak). And some unpleasantness happened to my other son in the music scene. Plus, my vocal cords are now damaged and I can’t sing certain notes now. It has taken away the pleasure of music.

That took a dark turn. Of course there were wonderful musical moments in my life. And music moves me when I do listen. And not just Americana! I love classic rock, classical, and Celtic especially. and the music of nature, naturally. Heh heh.

Eh. I’ll stop before I go on and on about favorite artists. Enjoy looking at Fiona and Drew.

I’m fine. Just musing. Long weekend.

Memories Do Help

Describe your most memorable vacation.

Oh blog prompt people, get creative! But, descriptions of my most memorable vacation can be found from June 5-23 in this here blog. I think the one to Arizona wins because it was both fun and mostly stress free. I’ve had great vacations in the past but they either featured wrangling small children, arguing with family members, etc.

We kept our cool 98% of the time, and I got to see this slot canyon. Win!

I’m glad to have memories of all the sights and sounds of our recent trip, because it’s pretty uninteresting here at the ranch right now (no more dead animals).

We are by ourselves again due to the latest family issue, and I’m not working hard enough to drum up people to do things with. The only person I asked was Anita, and she’s working all day every day again. At least we have dogs, horses, and the swimming pool (now at bath water temperature).

It did cool off this evening after some big winds heralded a cool front. That’s rare in July! And we’re waiting to see if Hurricane Beryl will bring any rain. I hope so.

Other than that, we’re planning for the future of this place, which is always a little scary, but must be done. I’m not going anywhere, though, as far as I know! We just have to get things organized with our partners and such.

Must plan for the four-legged and two-legged children’s sake.

Much Gratitude, Must Express

How do you express your gratitude?

Honestly, I think I’m pretty bad at expressing gratitude, at least to people. And there is SO much to be grateful for, even with the challenges my family and community keep coming up against. The support each of our communities give us can give the strength to make it one more day.

I didn’t take any photos today, but I’ll find some. I saw this beauty yesterday.

I do say I’m grateful, especially to those who help around the ranch, help with animal care, and fix the endless broken things. But no doubt I could say it more and come up with better ways to show my gratitude.

Example: I’m really lucky I can just ask my son to go look at a broken door or ask Anita to help with my screw-ups on the Red House bookings. I’m taking him to dinner and got her a shirt, but they both need to know how much their flexibility means to me.

And just knowing our niece and nephew who live on the ranch with us are there when we need them takes away so much stress. I just hope we reciprocate in ways we can help!

I think I do let Tarrin know how much her work with me and the horses means to me. Her journey has contributed greatly to mine. Mentors who share their growth are to be treasured. I try to share my own growth here, to pass it on!

She’s patient, firm, and kind. It’s a good way to be.

I guess I try to tell people in person how grateful I am for them. And for those I know via social media, I try to express it often. In this world where it’s sometimes hard to find like-minded people in person, having folks who understand your fears and worries to turn to online is invaluable. Thank you, blog readers, too!

This rabid wolf spider has black front legs that almost disappear.

Yes, nature. I also try to express gratitude to the earth and her inhabitants by treading lightly and harming as little as I can. I want to fit in, though as a human being in Western civilization, it’s hard to not take up too many resources.

I let this fellow out. There are more things to eat outside. It’s some kind of wolf spider.

I’m trying to learn to do better, mainly by reading my neighbor Sara’s blog on regenerative agriculture. In fact, you can head on over there and read her post on things you can do now to meet the goals I have been talking about. Hmm. Sara is someone I need to express gratitude toward!

Family, friends, community, mentors, our planetary home…I’m grateful for them all and will strive to make that clear!

Too Much Adulting

I thought way too much about adult topics like real estate, bills, car maintenance, and such. Then I started watching two old men call each other liars with no way to verify who’s telling the truth (US Presidential Debate).

I’m done. Just done. Back to concentrating very hard on the beauty of the world around me and the goodness that’s everywhere.

Like this! Whoever thought they’d see a Great Blue Heron at the top of an electric pole!

For example, we got help with a broken air conditioning unit so fast it made my head spin. I’m ever so grateful to have caring people in my life. That’s a good part of adulting.

Halfway through the year. It’s getting hot, but still no 100° days yet.

I leave you with bunnies. I saw at least three today, but I think these photos are the same one, morning and afternoon.

Self Care Begins at Home

How do you practice self-care?

Oh, there’s so much I do to maintain my tranquility. Daily meditation, yoga/stretches, my antidepressant, hanging out with horses, sleeping enough, and plenty of exercise, outdoors. With nature.

Happily, we made it home today, so I can get back to my usual routine. I did plenty of self care when we were traveling, though, including connecting with friends. We got to see my friend Steve again before we left, so I could get a picture.

I also needed to pick up two bags of plarn, yarn made from plastic bags. I sure hope I can make his cousin proud by making something for a charity out of it. I happen to know the stuff is hard to knit and crochet with. Maybe I’ll weave it? We will see.

It was great to get back to central Texas. It’s so green here (thanks to rain), and it’s nice to see creeks and ponds with water in them. I used to make fun of one of my professors who said he was moved emotionally when he first saw corn upon returning to Illinois. Well, I was moved to see my first corn growing in Texas. I should apologize to Jerry, ha ha.

It was good to pet all the the dogs and hug the heck out of Apache. Even Buttercup the chicken was glad to see me.

I was too busy hugging or petting the rest of the animals to get photos.

I’m remembering that my self care is mostly internal, but the little physical things you do for yourself matter a lot. Hmm. It may be time to take a dip in the pool, one of the best self-care things I do.