rant – Page 2 – The Hermits' Rest

How Can You Cope in Today’s Troubled Times?

There are some practices and “mind tricks“ I use to stay on a level key while the world of people, politics, and ethics changes to something almost unrecognizable. Note that I am not describing how to remain calm (I no longer know what that means or if anyone is “sane“ anymore). But rather I want to share what I do to keep myself productive, centered, and able to find joy/good/happiness.

I wrote this all out by hand. I needed to write.

Spend as much time outdoors as possible, doing chores, getting exercise, relaxing—it all counts.

You might see spring flowers in September!

Meditate. I count some of my bird observation is this – deep focus on breathing sound, etc. turning off the internal chatter (when I dictated the text, this came out as “cheddar”) that adds to anxiety.

Stay in the moment. Be aware of your surroundings. Pay attention to people and things around you. This lets you see moments of peace and beauty amid broader chaos.

Limit exposure to negativity. Stop listening to provocative sources of information remove controversial people from your life as much as possible – if you must be around someone (coworker, family, or service provider) set boundaries and only interact on neutral topics so you can just walk away physically or mentally.

Assume good intentions. Remind yourself that people who upset you mostly aren’t doing so to bother you —often they think they are doing good —so treat them kindly, assuming they are well intentioned from their perspective, and let them share their thoughts, but let unintentionally hurtful things flow over you —you can be kind and not let the harmful stuff inside you.

Treat people kindly. Doing something nice for no other reason than it’s the right thing to do makes you feel better and invites good to come back to you.

Be grateful. Take the kindness of others in and be grateful for it. Expressed your gratitude, because a lot of people really seem to crave the positive affirmation, and it doesn’t hurt to help them out.

Give yourself permission to relax and retreat. Read a book watch a funny or engaging television show or video. Do this in moderation. Hiding in Facebook or on TikTok can be a problem.

Remind yourself of connections. However you are connected to other people, groups and cultures, treasure your own connections to your groups and enjoy them—just not to the exclusion of others. We are ALL family. (OK I’m preaching here.)

—All X people are evil/my enemy. No, the ideas they are being fed are the issue, not the people. Be angry at the source, which most likely is corporate interests (says Suna and Robert Reich).

—I can’t do anything about X. No, by keeping yourself strong and focused on positive and constructive ideas and practices you are doing something.

—Person X drives me batty. Guess what? You choose your reaction to person X. Change it.

Laugh. Find people places or media that make you laugh or laugh at yourself kindly.

Enjoy animals. Domesticated or wild, they share our earth and are good enough to share their calm or funniness. Horses and dogs help me.

Recognize your limitations. We can’t do everything or fix every problem. Choose your battles and let go of minor issue. Discern what is within your capacity to change and do those things.

Hint: you can’t change other people‘s personalities and entrenched beliefs. You can change your reaction. This is a big lesson.

Love yourself. Remind yourself that you are lovable just as you are. Your mistakes and flaws do not define you or make you less deserving of love. It’s great to be loved and to accept love coming your way, but you aren’t defined by whether or not someone loves you. Everyone else is lovable too, just maybe not by you, sometimes

Your spiritual guides (God, spirit, goddess Buddha) love you just the way you are, too. If yours places conditions on its love consider another alternative.

Don’t hate people. If you want something to abhor there are plenty of other options. I abhor war, gun, violence, intolerance, corporate, greed, dysfunctional government, unethical propaganda, and institutions set up to divide people rather than unite them. I don’t hate people. Something made them the way they are, even egomaniacs and psychopaths. Hatred does not make anything better.

Forgive. Let go of resentment towards bullies mean people, hurtful individuals, etc. Letting resentment fester does not lead to peace. People screw up. Forgive them like you’d like to be when you screw up. You can’t fix some folks, but you can forgive them and move on.

Take care who you trust. Confirmation bias is real. Don’t just trust people who agree with you automatically. Instead, trust people with no vested interest in manipulating you or your emotions or in encouraging divisive thinking. This is hard, I know.

Surround yourself with things that make you happy (spark Joy ha ha ha). This will be different for each of us. I have lots of objects that help me: crystals, figurines of birds and horses, live flowers when possible, a cheerful coffee mug, a journal covered with stickers, colored pins, books art made by me or my family, and so much more. Other people might need minimal distractions to feel happy some need clean surroundings things that smell, good etc. You do you and don’t let others’ opinions of your surroundings bother you. They can do their own stuff. (Now, shared spaces require compromise, of course. There can be no fun scents in a house that contains my spouse.)

Move around. When you’re feeling overwhelmed or sad or afraid you can want to just stay in bed or your chair and curl up. But try to remind yourself that moving around/exercise is one of the best ways to lift your spirits. Even marching around your house or dancing to music helps. I like to take walks so I can observe beauty around me and experience the world with all my senses. Riding my horse is also very helpful, because I need to focus on what I’m doing rather than other issues.

Do some crafts. Making things helps you focus on something you enjoy, and creating items for others is an act of kindness thate brings positivity into your life.

July and August of my temperature blanket project.

Read inspirational or beautiful material. I love my nature books, and my magazines about horses, art, home improvement, and spirituality. Just be sure to find uplifting and interesting content. I have to limit my political and historical reading.

And finally, remember what the scripture below tells us.

Tee hee. I, too, can cherry pick Bible verses that support my point.

So…what other ideas do you have to share with others as we try to get through this time together?

Here’s What I Think

As if it matters, other than to me.

I think Americans should stop using their beloved guns to kill other people.

Here she goes again. No one is listening, says the greatest Egret ever.

It’s been made very clear that people love collecting weapons (knives and such, too) that aren’t designed to be helpful tools but rather to end the lives of other people. It makes them feel good. It makes them feel safe. Most of them do not plan to kill anyone else…unless they feel it’s justified.

All these folks murdering children in schools, former coworkers, their domestic partners, people of different religions, ethnic backgrounds, or political beliefs…they all feel justified.

This society has lost the ability to act ethically. Otherwise we’d not think it’s okay to kill under certain circumstances (that you get to define).

Go ahead and use your guns and knives as the tools they were intended to be. I’m not in charge of your reality, mindset, or philosophy. I’m not some liberal snowflake or whatever the latest put-down is. I’m just begging you to actually pay attention to what your religious figures tell you. They tell you to be kind to others. Respect other living beings. Find a moral compass and follow it.

Oh well. People are being told to hate, so they will. At least I can enjoy the demise of civilization with a nice horse. Today there was ZERO drama, and we did the “scary” and hilly part of our paths. And Drew was good for Vicki.

He is telling me to stop dawdling and unsaddle him.

I can’t ignore the outside world but I can treasure the goodness and love that surrounds me.

Three Thoughts I Had

Are they all true truisms? You can decide.

One. The best time to go to Costco on the weekend in a college town is during a home football game. Everyone but nerds, Goths, old hippies (us), and people with toddlers whose piercing screams can damage hearing are at the game or watching it with friends. Perhaps the screaming toddler is optional.

Very empty Costco parking lot as the sun was going down.

Two. If you happen to get overheated (say the only time you had during the day to exercise your horse is around noon in high humidity), go inside and cool down while hydrating before jumping into a shower, even if you need to leave to go have fun. If you shower while your body temperature is still elevated, you will commence sweating after you “dry off,” and if you have whatever syndrome has caused me to sweat rivers, you will be dripping and soaking your clean clothing. Thus, you’ll stay overheated longer and negate the shower. The fun can wait.

Three. All those influencers should STFU about the pressing need for all older women to “do something” about their “belly fat” or “fat apron.” First, since nearly every older woman I know develops this at a certain age, it seems to be normal and nothing to feel shame over. Second, what if that fat is where all our wisdom that can’t fit in our brains lives? I keep reading how important the gut is to mental functioning. Maybe it is doing something important down there.

I’m going to call it my wisdom belly, pat it, and thank it for doing its job, whatever it actually is.

Those are my thoughts. Now for an observation that surprised me. We went to the Barnes and Noble in College Station today, because I miss good bookstores. The only ones I get to these days are the little one in Rockdale that’s full of fantasy and romance books and the BookPeople branch in the Austin airport (a mere shadow of the real magnificent store).

Both Lee and I enjoyed ourselves very much. I had a nice time looking at the other patrons, their ages, their clothing, their mannerisms. I caught myself thinking, “Wow, these people look so normal.” You see, it was those same Goths, nerds, old (very) hippies, gamers, and professorial types I’d later see in Costco. Apparently that’s my idea of normal?

Upon reflection I realized that other than the past five or so years, I’ve lived in cities with universities and lots of engineers (Gainesville, Urbana-Champaign, and Austin). My jobs have been with writers and software developers. Yep. That’s what I see as “normal,” not ranchers, farmers, cowboys, small-town business people, and rural poor folks.

I wonder how long it will take for my brain to feel as at home in Cameron or Temple (more of a military area) as I do in college towns? I don’t feel bad about discovering this about myself. I’m sure everyone feels more comfortable in familiar surroundings. But I’ve been out here a good while, know lots of people, have great friends…so I’m a little disappointed that I haven’t assimilated very well. I’m still from another culture. Hmm.

Hey, I do have a yard full of tractors and other such conveyances.

Murphy’s Law Day

A friend posted that today was Murphy’s Law Day. Suddenly, I understood my morning.

I felt like this poor bird grasshopper who keeled over right in front of me today.

The power glitches last night had both my computer systems confused. I couldn’t get my peripherals to work right. Every way I tried to plug my monitors and camera in failed.

I got frustrated. Then I found out I’d botched setting up meetings in India. I lost cables. I spilled a soda on my desk. Ugh.

Anything that can go wrong will go wrong.

Thanks, Captain Murphy at Edward’s Air Force e Base, who came up with this saying. You are right some days.

I was ready to join these Purple Martins and migrate outa here.

I persisted, though, and by 3 pm I had my work setup functioning. I just plugged things into and out of the weird docking station with no instructions until things worked. I just have too many cables and power sources.

I even broke a nail. Woe is me.

Middle finger has repair. The others are shorter.

My friends at lunch thought I was going to explode, but the hour away from blank monitors did me good! And I did have a couple of good work meetings. So Murphy wasn’t everywhere.

But like Penney watching cows, I didn’t take my guard down in case of new complications.

By the end of the day after a successful session with Apache the horse followed by a cold rum and soda, I was fine. Life has ups and downs!

Tarot card of the day

Eight of swords

Ha. The Gaian Tarot has an image of people working cooperatively. I did a bit of that today. Sorry I forgot to take a photo.

Robin Wood shows how I really felt today., however.

I was feeling pretty trapped my technology issues, but I found that path out, the one shown in the card. Whew.

Dang You, Musky Satellites

You can certainly get accustomed to your technology. When it fails, your day can go downhill fast. That was my experience when my deal with the Devil, otherwise known as a subscription to the Musky StarLink Satellite Connectivity Godsend. When it’s good, it’s our link to the world. When it’s bad, wow, you feel disconnected!

StarLink went down in the middle of my work day. It did not help that my backup plan, connecting to my phone hotspot, was unavailable. AT&T was displaying SOS. Yup. The phone was out of commission, too. I was hosed.

Just waiting for the vultures to start circling my dead connectivity.

It’s hard to tell your coworkers why you’re not at meetings when your only option is to send them a letter, ya know? But, it’s not common and the system is mostly reliable. Still, Lee and I both have had fleeting thoughts about what would happen if someone attacked the satellites we rely on. Back to the olden days? Eek.

I do still write things by hand, like my bullet journal.

Anyway, StarLink came back. And I went out and rode my horse in the intense heat and sweated all that paranoia off!

Tarot card of the day

Man, this new practice of drawing a card a day after many years without it is very different. The thing that’s taking some getting used to is how darned encouraging the cards are so far. Today? 9 of Pentacles.

This card is about having all you need (in material things) and feeling content. That’s exactly how I’ve been feeling with regard to my physical situation these days. I can’t imagine having a more pleasant and supportive setup in my life, designed to keep me mentally healthy and stable no matter what else is going on.

The 9 of Pentacles reminds me of how kind my family has been to provide this safe haven at the Hermits’ Rest. I have my animals, my pool, the porch, my books, and all that yarn. Material things aren’t necessary, but for some of us they provide comfort, security, and stability when everything around us is unstable.

Hmm. Lots to think about today.

What’s with All the Insect Bites?

Argh. I know it’s normal for a damp time in summer, but gee whiz, I’ve had ENOUGH already with mosquitoes, fire ants, and biting flies. It’s hard to enjoy myself outdoors right now!

And it was a nice, if humid, day in between showers.

First, house flies are having one of their periodic invasions. They follow me everywhere, indoors and out, and either bite or leave a weird feeling where they land. They are just so buzzy.

Then there are the mosquitoes that make me unable to stand still or sit outside unless I’m in the swimming pool. I saw 6 at once this afternoon. And they come get me in my sleep, too. Mosquito nets seem like a smart idea. Since I’m slightly allergic, I’ve been mighty uncomfortable from itching.

I don’t let them sit on me long enough to photograph, so this is from Pexels.

We cannot forget fire ants. I wish we could. They seem to be on the move, because no matter where I stopped today, ants would be on my feet instantly. I paid a price for any photo I took today! There are way too many to treat chemically, but I know of a few beds I’ll go after.

One more! I think there are no -see-ums or some tiny biting insect out right now, too. My arms and neck will start hurting and I don’t see any cause. Wah.

Pretend there are bugs in these mushrooms.

No wonder I walked in the rain a lot today. If I stay on the road, not much will bite in the rain. Also yay rain.

And yay. Half the year done in my temperature blanket calendar style.

It’s too Painful

Living in a place where two incompatible world views exist and where each world view sees the other as filled with stupid, hateful liars has become almost too painful for me. I hate being able to see how strongly each faction sees itself as right and true and the others as blind.

I don’t think my own beliefs and values even matter. Those of us who want to live in harmony with our friends and loved ones, all of them, will be the first to be caught in the crossfire when it all falls to pieces. We’re just expendable wimps.

It’s like cats versus dogs, and I’m the rabbit they both want to eliminate.

Today people I admire were vilifying people like me for daring to express their beliefs in public. These weren’t extremists, just who I thought were regular people with different views from the other people I admire.

It’s painful to witness. Time for me to retreat and try to regroup. I won’t heal completely or forget how frightened people act towards the “other” but I need to regain my incentive for participating in the world outside my little ranch.

Later, haters.

Concerned

I have a bad feeling about tomorrow. I care about people on all sides of the national and international strife right now, and my love for them trumps any cause.

For anyone under armed attack, I wish you safety.

For anyone protesting, I wish you safety and peace.

For those instructed to control others, I wish you safety and good judgment.

For the powerless and afraid, I wish you safety and protection.

May we find a path to a world of reason, communication, compassion, and peace.

Yes, I said the T-word in a sentence.

A Camping Dilemma

Any day out I nature is good. It did rain much of today, then got cold, but rain sounds good on the roof and I have warm clothing stashed in Seneca’s closet. However, the rain was not enough to dampen the spirits of our fellow campers.

Two, perhaps three (hard to tell) groups of incredibly enthusiastic Scouts are here, with one taking up three sites across from us. They are having FUN. So far I haven’t detected any actual scouting activities from this group, unless bellowing, screeching, and making siren sounds can earn you a merit badge. The adults coped by yelling back.

I coped by trying to leave, but it kept raining on me.

The other group was set up in the other camping area by the lake. They even had on uniforms as they blasted through empty campsites screaming instructions. One of them saw me and yelled, “Stranger Danger.” I was annoyed by then and reminded them that scouting encourages them to respect other campers.

I’m under a shelter. They’re scampering off.

They were on their way to a ceremony (I’d heard, ha ha), so by the time Lee had picked me up from standing in the rain and we drove by, they were doing a lovely ceremony with flags and saluting. Of course, THAT is when the park police went by. Such good little citizens.

I got to see a gun millipede while in the shelter in the rain.

Note that I did get a little walk in between rains and found a couple of interesting plants. I was trying out the new and improved iNat app, too. It identifies what I see immediately, so I don’t have to do it when I get back from a walk. Fewer Master Naturalist hours, but that’s fine.

Meanwhile, Lee and I took a drive around the area and looked at a couple of cute small towns. When we came back, the local kids were back outside, now throwing a football. I left again, and had a pleasant, if chilly, walk on the Nails Creek Trail, featuring lake views, more fun plants, and an owl.

A better picture of Sandyland Bluebonnet

The dilemma for me is whether I should have gone over and talked to the adults about the noise levels. I see two sides. One is that these are children who are outdoors. They don’t need to use their “inside voices” and that’s probably fun. Knowing how structured and protected the lives of kids are these days, this was probably a rare opportunity for free play with their friends, and that’s exhilarating for sure.

On the other hand, those of us who weren’t in their party could not enjoy our campsites when it wasn’t raining. In fact, we could only enjoy inside the RV with music or television on. I’ve been told that the training for the adults covers how to act when camping. I didn’t see a lot of buddy system or respect for the leaders.

I’m just not sure if I should have asked the park staff to talk to them or talked to them myself. I know how people react these days, so I said nothing. I honestly don’t mind kids having fun at reasonable volumes and staying in their own sites or the road. They were running all over the campground while the adults mostly sat in their chairs. I wish they’d gone on a hike or something but they’d have scared all the birds and animals.

My fervent hope is that they all pack up and leave early to go to church. Fingers crossed.

By the way, I want to thank any readers who went to peaceful protests today. Sign creativity was high! Since 2020, I can no longer do big crowds. But I’m grateful to those of you who fought through introversion and showed up.

And hey, here’s the first row of the 2025 temperature blanket. It’s warmer!

It’s Texas—Everything Stings, Bites, or Pokes You

…or it gives you allergies (all the beautiful flowers). I know this, having lived in east-central Texas for nearly thirty years. But, you know what? I chose to stay here long after my reason for arriving (a spouse’s job—the job left him, then he left me) no longer was pertinent.

Texas is beautiful and dangerous. These Northern Shovelers are harmless.

Upon arrival, it was immediately clear that I wasn’t in the Midwest anymore. I recognized oak trees, but they were tiny. I recognized a couple of birds, but what were those grackles? And why are so many things trying to hurt me?

I could have chosen either of two options. I could have complained about how strange and awful it is here, nature-wise, or I could learn about why all the flora and fauna are the way they are. I chose to study the plants, insects, reptiles, etc., and figure out how to coexist safely. That’s why you see me wandering all over rural areas and parklands feeling safe and happy. I know what to look out for.

I will not stomp through that grass without appropriate footwear.

So, when I went into the hen house today to get eggs but didn’t find but one, I was not surprised to see my old friend the rat snake reclining above the nesting boxes. I asked it to go eat some rodents, please, and left. That’s because I know what a rattlesnake or cottonmouth or coral snake looks like. And copperheads aren’t common where I live. This snake is useful.

Here’s where I find myself being intolerant and judgmental. I apologize in advance. I live in a rural area and spend a lot of time outdoors. If I screeched every time I saw a rat or a bee, it would be really screechy at the Hermits’ Rest.

Or a worm-like insect. We sure have our share of caterpillars.

I just wonder why people choose to live here in the land of mesquite, greenbrier, cactus, and poison ivy without learning to identify them so they can avoid them, and dress safely when straying off sidewalks and manicured lawns. And why not learn which are the very few insects, spiders, or snakes that can actually hurt you and just let the others be? Or study them. Dang, this bold jumping spider is CUTE.

Look at that face! I know it’s a friend. Black widows don’t get to cruise around on my shoes.

There’s enough human-made nastiness right now that’s flooding us either fear (or sadness; I felt like weeping from the loss of hope today). It’s such a good feeling to know your place in nature and appreciate that every living thing has a “job” or reason to be in the ecosystem. Why scream at a rodent when you can deal with them and then observe them outdoors? Besides, cute li’l bunnies are rodents!

No rabbit photo, so here’s some rabbit tobacco. It’s a plant (Diaperia verna)

And those mean plants? Many are delicious! I’ve eaten greenbrier shoots every day this week, and anyone who’s tried nopales knows cactus is yummy. You just have to learn about it.

You can’t eat this, but isn’t it pretty? Wild indigo sepals after the petals fell out. Baptisia leucophaea

Yes, I’m judgmental about the squeamish. I’m probably lucky I wasn’t born with any phobias and learned to deal with my fear (flying roaches) pretty early in adulthood. Once I learned more about them, I’ve become very comfortable around the diversely defensive plants and animals I see. I hope more folks who are fearful out in nature can try this! You don’t have to become a Master Naturalist, just read about our world’s inhabitants, their habits, and how to deal with them safely.

On that note, enjoy White Pelicans, who are harmless except to fish.

I’m still working on that other topic from yesterday. I’ll get to it now that I’m in a very quiet campground on Lake Somerville. It’s pretty darned nice.