Ramblings – Page 14 – The Hermits' Rest

Not Very Traditional

What traditions have you not kept that your parents had?

It’s a slow news day here at the ranch, so I’ll answer this one. My parents didn’t have many traditions that I can think of, so it’s a little hard to come up with them.

Ah, Easter is a non-tradition for me. Aren’t we a happy 60s family?

I remember they always had a drink or two before dinner. So we always ate later than some of my friends. The drinks were usually vodka and grapefruit juice, but that changed later and Dad had scotch and Mom had morphine. Anyway, I don’t do that. I have wine occasionally before/during dinner and bourbon and an ice cube after. But not all that often.

I do like wine, just not being tipsy anymore (Pexel image)

My parents both thought smoking made them look cool. Dad did look distinguished with his pipe and Mom was elegant with her cigarettes until she wasn’t. I have memories of her vacuuming my room while smoking and leaving long ash caterpillars on the floor. I’d have to re-do it. Mom tried. She had an addiction issue. Watching her die was enough to make me never want to smoke anything, especially since I’d already had so much second-hand smoke that my lungs were weakened. So, not keeping that tradition.

Mom’s floating around up there giving me advice.

They did have a tradition I liked, which was walking the dog (Pumpkin, whom I’ve mentioned before) every night after dinner. Since they were already tipsy, it meant for fun neighbor conversations. I’d walk the dog every evening if I had fewer dogs and a sidewalk. But it was nice and got Mom out of the house while she was sick.

I’d go cuckoo without the dogs. This is an actual cuckoo I saw today.

Damn, that was a downer. I bet this question was supposed to be about holidays or something.

This cheers me up. Squash soup with garlic chives and bread. So good.

Oh! A tradition I wish I’d kept up was having a beautiful garden and propagating plants. Mom was great at hybridizing camellias and daylilies. She grew beautiful orchids in later years. Dad was a great garden designer and loved to keep his lawn and flower beds perfect. I never have been that good or patient with plants but I sure enjoyed watching Dad. He was a great edger.

I just look at plants in case there’s a cool insect on them. That’s a dusky-winged hoverfly.

I guess I sort of maintain the plant tradition with all my native plant observations and how hard I try to protect them. There, I kept one.

Mom was crafty like me. I’ve also kept that family tradition going. This is the border of my sweater. Meh. Maybe it will look better when it’s done.

By the way, new to the Hermits’ Rest website is a page listing all the fungi I’ve identified on iNat.

Crafty Gal

How would you describe yourself to someone?

Every time I try to honestly describe myself people tell me I’m wrong. But I’m telling you how I’d describe myself, okay?

This is me in black and white, to emphasize that when I was young people still used black and white film all the time.

First, I’m crafty. I like to create pretty things, though I’m more into process than product. I rarely wear things I make, with some exceptions. Still, I’m always working on projects, like my temperature blankets.

This doesn’t show the cool spell of the past week.

A lot of people do a craft project during the Olympics. I didn’t intend to do one, but a friend crocheted something I thought was cute, so I picked up some leftover Mandala yarn and started this Granny Pop cardigan. You can find it on Ravelry or search for it.

It will get a band around the front and neck, plus sleeves. First I finish the body!

Back to my self description. Here is how I’d do it.

I’m very intelligent, with some gaps in knowledge even though I’ve had extensive humanities education.
I’m sensitive and intuitive, and overly empathic at times. This doesn’t lead to popularity.
I offend people easily. What I think is funny sometimes isn’t.
I also help people often and am told I’m kind.
I’m conflict avoidant. Family of origin issues.
Though I’m an introvert, I enjoy speaking in public and used to like to sing in public when my voice worked. I find teaching and training fun, but tiring.
I’m stronger both physically and mentally than I’ve ever been.
I am fairly fit because I like exercise when I’m having fun (not big on gym workouts or running).
Physically I’m a short woman with the build of a taller woman. I’m medium in weight, and long waisted.
I’m average looking with light brown eyes and fine hair that I’m letting go gray.
I’m a cisgender -heterosexual woman with She/her pronouns.
Politically I’m progressive/liberal but practical. I can think for myself and evaluate situations independent of what my social group says.
Religiously, I’m not fond of organized religion not one little bit, and that includes ones I’ve used to center my own spiritual life around. I’m mostly drawn to the teachings of the Buddha, Starhawk (she’s a neopagan), Native American teachings, and Jesus. I’m a pacifist, which makes me a big target I guess. I have no expectations that anyone else follow my path.
I love nature and the earth. It’s all fascinating. That includes my favorites, humans, horses, dogs, and birds.
What I know of human history saddens me. People are very cruel and people with power are so easily corrupted.

That was all rather unorganized. Perhaps that’s why I didn’t describe myself as a good writer or more accurately, a good editor. But it’s what they pay me to do!

This made me laugh today. I saw a stump and branch that I thought looked like a deer. Then I realized there was a young buck next to it.

The Freedom to Flee

If you won two free plane tickets, where would you go?

Honestly, I have no idea where I’d go if I won two free plane tickets. I’d probably be pragmatic and use it to fly to Hilton Head in November, first class.

This is what you get when you ask AI to make a picture of plane tickets to Hilton Head. That gave me a laugh.

Also, honestly, today I got so frustrated with my moods, my isolation (sometimes a hermit doesn’t feel so hermit-like and needs someone), and my lack of options that I seriously considered booking a hotel room in Austin and hiding there all weekend watching the Olympics.

I got over myself and decided not to waste my Hilton Honors points on that. Better to stay where I am and deal with things. And I did. So there. I’m still a little short-tempered, which is how I get when the anxiety attacks attack.

These are not the kind of mushrooms that help with PTSD, but we have a lot of them after all the rain.

And thanks to making good decisions, I got to experience the relief of getting a new ($$$) swimming pool pump. Yes, the original one in our pool has already kicked the bucket. It was making so much noise that it was no fun sitting outside in the nice weather and I couldn’t hear birds very well.

Lee and I got to sit by the pool and enjoy the silence this evening. That was healing silence. Maybe knowing I am free to flee if I need to makes me happy to just stay where I am.

Bee happy! Finally I got a GOOD bumblebee in a morning glory!

Tomorrow, gotta move some hay I didn’t move quickly enough. Then I’ll need to dry it out before storing it! Horses will enjoy this delicious hay grown right next door!

Companion Animal Preferences

Dogs or cats?

First. I like both dogs and cats. I’ve had both as pets, though never more than two cats at once.

Vlassic points out he has cat-like reflexes

I had cats when I lived in apartments and when my children were small because it was easier. They aren’t much work unless you really work at interacting. I don’t see all the moods and personalities others see in cats. They all make the same two or three faces and look nice curled into a ball. This makes me sound like not a cat person. But I’d have one if Lee wasn’t so allergic.

This is the only cat I know now, Potato. She lives with my son.

What I don’t like is cat pee and dirty litter boxes. My sister’s houses always reeked of cat poo. I could never stay long. And I had a cat that got all annoyed at us and peed all over my house, mostly in hidden spots on plastic bags. It was horrible. Once we let him go outside he was fine. We were sure he’d get killed quickly and die happy, but no. He held out forever. He lasted longer than any of my marriages (though Lee only has two years to go to last longer).

Mostly I’ve had dogs. I get along with dogs. Many of my early playmates were neighborhood dogs, back when they all roamed the neighborhood. Our black spaniel dog Maggie was my nice big sister, and Pumpkin, the dachshund mix who came afterwards, was so much a part of the family that we’d forget she couldn’t talk. She was there for my dad and brother while my mom was sick, and was the perfect emotional therapy dog, before that was a thing.

Carlton has been my emotional therapy dog. Here is the day we took him home.

Since we got our family dogs when my kids got older, Gwynn the Corgi and Scrunchy, the pug, I haven’t been without a dog. Well, make that “we” haven’t been without a dog. They are mostly Lee’s dogs, but I enjoy all six of them, too.

I’d feel weird without a dog. However, it hurts so much to lose one. I just looked at all my photos of dogs. Sniff. I miss our past companions. But here are random shots of the ones we have now, who are just as good!

PS: it’s looking cloudy out and there is rain predicted. That would sure be good.

Not much left of the little pond except crawfish and bullfrog homes.

Lost in Time

Which activities make you lose track of time?

Ah, I’m answering this question rather than sharing my current thoughts. They’ll be more refined tomorrow.

For certain, what my husband will tell you makes me lose track of time is nature walks. I just disappear and re-emerge with no idea how long I was gone. I’m completely enthralled by the sights, sounds, and smells of new places or new things in familiar places. I don’t want it to end.

Here’s a new thing I found in the driveway! It’s delicious common purslane, a portulaca (*Portulaca oleracea*) just like the cultivated one below.

Look at the beautiful Texas Striped Sweat Bee in my volunteer portulaca/moss rose

Hanging out with the animals also can make me lose track of time. I’ve just spent twenty minutes thinking about how beautiful Carlton is to me. My love for this guy never ends.

I ended up spending more time with Drew today than I’d intended, too. I’d walked to the next-door unused mailbox to drop something off, and decided to come back through the horse pasture, you know, in case there were any interesting plants or insects. So, I was concentrating on plants when I got a feeling I was being followed.

I kept going until I felt something hot on my neck.

Then I realized Droodles was sneaking up on me.

We ended up hanging out for quite a while just enjoying each other’s company. He didn’t push me around looking for treats, just rested his head on me and asked to be scratched. It’s so good to get along with each other again!

Mostly. That ear is showing some mischief is afoot.
Yes, I’m not much of a fashionista in this weather. That shirt is very orange and the head covering looks silly but keeps hair out of my face.

Not surprisingly, the other activity that leads me to lose track of time is reading. I’ve been reading Sibley Birds, Second Edition since I bought it in New Mexico. It’s only 600+ pages. I can’t stop looking at all the birds, learning new things about familiar ones and finding out what else might be out there in Texas (and wherever else I go).

I will admit to skimming Arctic residents and ocean birds. Otherwise, I’m reading it all. But I’m in the oriole section! I’m almost done! Do not worry. I have a nice long book about animal tracks lined up. That’s what happens when people stop mailing me novels, I guess. (I’m fine for novels! I have some enqueued.)

If I’m repeating myself, forgive me. I’m working on changing my mindset and that can wear me out until I’m through the hardest part (letting go of an unproductive mindset).

Thanks for being there, friends and family. You are appreciated even when I don’t show it well.

People Bother Me So Let’s Talk about Weird Stuff

What bothers you and why?

Right now, people bother me. Sometimes the isolation out here in a sparsely populated rural area gets to me, and sometimes I’m glad I’m not around fellow humans too much. I’m so iffy on this! Humans both fascinate and repulse me. I find individuals fascinating and groups (political parties, religious denominations, single-focus nonprofits) frightening the more I get to know them. That bothers me.

What else bothers me? Inexplicable behaviors of non-human living beings, like today’s puzzling behavior involving bees and birds.

[Some of this I also posted elsewhere, but I’ve changed it a bit.]

First, bees. For the past week or two I’d been noticing a lot of honeybees around my legs. It seemed like the earth was buzzing. Upon closer examination, I saw dozens of bees crawling on the tiny blossoms of the grass (I think it’s Dallis grass) that is blooming now. The bees were all very busy, zipping from flower to flower (not leisurely sipping as they usually do), and they were loaded with pollen.

This went on for a few days. Yesterday, there was no buzzing as I walked along the field in my daily bird-watching patrol. Then, late in the afternoon I was over by the trees listening to a Yellow-billed Cuckoo when I heard something that sounded like one of those annoying drones people fly these days. I looked up and didn’t see a drone. I saw a large mass of tiny things moving along at a rapid clip. It was hundreds and hundreds of bees swarming. I guess they were moving on to better pastures. I’m not sure where their hive was before, because I hadn’t heard one in a couple of years. I hope they find a nice new dead tree!

Did you know bees swarm in giant balls o’ bees? No, they do not. This FAKE image is what WordPress AI gave me when I asked for a swarm of flying bees. Sophisticated it is not.

Moving along, I’ve also been dealing with birds overhead, specifically the beautiful but omnipresent Barn Swallows. Now, normally they hang out on our porches, building mud nests, raising babies and pooping. They also eat numerous insects, so they get to stay (also it’s ILLEGAL to mess with a nest of wild birds; you can ask Mike Mitchell about it if you don’t believe me). We coexist just fine, looking into or out of the windows at each other, and enjoying the swimming pool area.

However, lately, the little darlings have not been at all happy with me. They aren’t nesting anymore, just flying around the ponds and in the air catching food. They are always there, and for some reason they resent my presence. When I go for my morning or afternoon walks, I often hear a very loud CHIRP, with a Doppler effect as the chirper moves away. The swallows ambush me from behind, for the most part, but occasionally they fly right at me and veer off just before they make contact with my head.

They are fast little guys.

I have absolutely no clue as to why they are dive-bombing me. I’ve had Mockingbirds and Red-winged Blackbirds do this when they are nesting nearby. But, hey, do they think I want to home in on their mosquitos?

Bwa-ha-ha. This is AI’s best attempt at “giant mosquito.” One big eye and antennae on the side of its head. Well, that was a fun experiment.

All the other animals and plants are absolutely not bothering me. I enjoyed seeking out small flashes of peace and beauty around the property today. This stuff is literally saving me, y’all. If things go to hell in a hand basket, at least I’ll be able to enjoy wherever we end up!

But things will be fine. Humans, bothersome as they are, seem quite resilient.

I’m Certain That…

List 10 things you know to be absolutely certain.

1. Bullies are everywhere

2. Humans are driven to belittle whoever they see as the “other”

3. There were no “good old days” — it’s always sucked

4. Hormones make things really hard for women

5. Life is better with companion animals

6. There is something wonderful wherever you are

7. Politicians are not to be trusted

8. You don’t really know anyone else

9. Everyone is interesting

10. Peace may not be attainable, but it’s a worthy goal

I’m Not Getting Older, I’m Getting Better?

What do you think gets better with age?

The ambiguous question here could be asking about fine wine, whiskey, cheese, or the patina on sculptures. It could also be asking what gets better as people get older. I’ll answer that one, though I warn you a lot of it will sound familiar. I don’t have that many themes in me.

One thing that I and many of my friends have found to get better with age is the ability to not need to be popular, liked, or acclaimed. It’s like that dull women group on Facebook: we are able to accept our ordinariness as well as our quirks and unique features. Not everyone will be impressed. And many of us elders are just fine with it. Loving yourself just as you are is something that takes a while to learn, for many.

Age also brings long-term perspective. It’s hard to have the insights that come from a long view until you have one. If you make it past age 50 or so you start to see patterns that repeat and can say, oh yes, I remember when television was going to ruin us but didn’t — probably video games didn’t ruin our children and TikTok won’t ruin our grandchildren. Maybe.

Me pensively taking the long view. Best I can do.

A final gift of age is that you come to appreciate little things in life. As your mind and body weaken, you are glad you can still read books and move around some. You appreciate sunrises and sunsets, because you don’t have many left. And you rejoice in the kindnesses you see in others.

That’s the best part for me, ferreting out the goodness hiding in plain sight. Try it! You don’t have to be older to do it!

Speaking of goodness, I cleaned my saddle and replaced my missing conchos. I have a saguaro cactus theme.

(I think the title to my post came from an ad for hair dye, right? Yes, I looked it up. It’s from the early 1970s.)

(Bonus: I think I wrote a five-paragraph paper, the thing we kept being assigned to do in high school. Mrs. Chisholm would be pleased, if she were still on this earth.)

Going to Bed Cooler

What time do you go to bed and wake up currently?

The important thing about going to bed tonight is that it’s in my own bedroom, where I can wind down in comfort. Yes, the parts (mostly) arrived and the upstairs air conditioning unit is fixed. I hated to complain, since downstairs was fine and we are very fortunate to have the motorhome to sleep in (made challenging by the malfunctioning slide—those things are a lot of trouble). I’m happy to be upstairs doing my evening things.

Highlight of my day: new conchos for Apache’s saddle. One of his got lost. Let’s see if I can get them on.

To answer the question, these days I head upstairs at around 9 pm unless there’s something interesting on television (rare). I get ready for bed, but then I stay up blogging (as I am now), adding observations to iNaturalist, and reading. It’s nice and quiet and comfy, so I go to sleep when I feel like it, usually 10:30-11.

Here’s the male of the grasshopper I shared yesterday. Roseate skimmer. Or carmine.

Like in the olden days, I sometimes wake up in the middle of the night and read some more. They say using your phone wakes you up, but I select pretty boring articles. That helps when I wake up concerned about out someone or something.

One concern was that I discovered my very important knitting needle was broken.

I’m usually up around 7 am, except for Thursdays, when I’m up at 6:15 to do open office hours at 7, for the Europeans who might need help with Planview apps. Few do. On the other hand, lots of folks needed help today! It evens out. I’ll really miss all the interesting people I meet once this job ends!

I’ll have more time to ride in the motorhome and look at weather phenomena then.

You may note that I sleep a lot. I always have needed more sleep than many people. I expected to need sleep as I got older, especially since my thyroid medication has bumped up my metabolism a bit. But I sure enjoy 9 hours. Lee sleeps more than me!

I’m yawning like Carlton, so time for bed!

I do fine on less sleep, but I don’t want to keep Lee up. If I could, I’d stay up so I could watch Colbert or the Daily Show. I miss them, but avoiding too much gnashing of teeth over news is healthy for me.

Present and Future Excitement

What are you most excited about for the future?

Gosh, I’m not excited about much in the future. Watching the fall of a civilization and seeing the rights of myself and my friends and family threatened isn’t what I’d call exciting; it’s more terrifying. And I feel so small and powerless (if one more person tells me I can make everything better by voting I will over-react in a ridiculous fashion. I DO vote but that’s not how things truly get done).

I’m feeling old, tattered, and fragile, like this wind-beaten Viceroy

Wait, I do look forward to driving around in Seneca and finding new bits of nature to explore. I hope to have that freedom. After all, I’m a harmless old woman and I have a heterosexual spouse, so I’m not too threatening on the surface. I just want to look at birds, bugs, and plants. Finding new ones is excitement enough for me.

This katydid was new for me: Black-margined Shieldback (*Pediodectes nigromarginatus*), pretty much only found in Texas.

And maybe Drew and I can become good partners! At least he is listening to my instructions like a champ this week. He walks until he is asked to trot. Hoorah!

We are good equines. We will be here for future excitement.

As for present excitement, we didn’t get any with Hurricane Beryl in our part of Texas, so I concentrated on seeing how my friends near Houston and on the coast fared. I was happy that our family members made it fine.

There was wind and .11” of rain here. I enjoyed the wind and the smell you get from hurricane clouds. You smell a little salt are, like the “cool Gulf breeze” Lee’s dad used to talk about when it was sweltering in Yorktown, Texas. To me it feels like Florida, when I’d take long walks at night in my breezy neighborhood just west of Ft. Lauderdale. I just stood and felt the wind for a good while this afternoon. Living in the moment!

Here’s a moment: the blanket through yesterday. If it hadn’t cooled off yesterday, there would have been a whole row of 95-99° highs.

I think the livestock were the happiest with today’s weather. The wind or “something gray” blew open the gate to the back pasture, so I found the horses far away at horse time. They liked that. Plus, Bianca, the lone chicken, was practically her old self today, since it didn’t get over 90°. She was out catching insects and sitting in the water trough like a happy hen.

Even her comb has some color in it again.

So yeah, even though I’m going through one of my pessimistic spates, I see what’s good out there! We all need each other’s support, so if you notice someone faltering, please reach out!

Maybe my exciting future bird will look like this!