daily life – Page 96 – The Hermits' Rest

What to Do When You’re Triggered?

Earlier in the week, a series of events unfolded in a group, the details of which are irrelevant. The outcome is where I’m focusing today. As people interacted, the scene became more and more like ones I went through very frequently when the organization I was working for was undergoing a crisis. And it was hard on the participants.

Even good teams have trouble putting everything together correctly sometimes. Photo: *@Nodar77 via Twenty20*

I needed to provide input, redirect the conversation, or in some way diffuse the situation, but I could not. I mentally froze up, as I retreated into a way of feeling and acting from over a decade ago. I didn’t get memory flashbacks, but my emotions went into overdrive and I could FEEL the atmosphere at my old job when volunteers I directed and others at the organization were engaged in unpleasant and unproductive exchanges.

I was triggered, I guess. My current set of coping mechanisms helped me, at least a little. I didn’t burst into tears or run out of the room, like I might have over a decade ago. Instead, I played a word game on my phone, since all my life I’ve coped with being overwhelmed by doing something with my hands (hence all that knitting and playing of Bejeweled). I find that when a good chunk of my brain is busy on a soothing task, I can make better use of the rest of the ole noggin.

Recipe: Suna’s Cornbread Oyster Dressing

A friend asked me if I had found an oyster dressing recipe when I was in South Carolina last week. No, but I make it every year at Thanksgiving! So, here, in my general and not-for-real-cookbook fashion, is how I make the dressing every year. Back to introspection soon.

At right are two large pans of dressing. One omits oysters, for the squeamish. ZZZZZ.

This is actually my mother’s recipe with a few little tweaks by me.

Ingredients

1 stick of butter, or more
1 large onion, diced or cut into small pieces
1 cup or more of sliced celery
1 9-inch cornbread, made however you like, though best to omit sugar
2 cups bread stuffing; I use the seasoned kind
Additional herbs that you like: rosemary, sage, tarragon, poultry seasoning, etc.
Options: 1 cup of nuts (I like pecans) or diced tart apple.
2 eggs, whisked
1 pint raw oysters and juice
1 box chicken broth (you may not need it all)

Method

Melt butter in a large pan. Add onion and celery and cook, stirring, until onion is clear. Smell it. MMM. Smells like Thanksgiving.

Meanwhile, crumble cornbread into a large bowl. Add breadcrumbs (or just use two cornbreads). Add seasonings and other optional dry ingredients. Mix completely.

Add onion mixture, eggs, and oysters, plus all the “oyster water” (gives flavor). Stir gently, and add chicken broth until evenly moist, but not soppy wet. Sprinkle paprika on top to make it pretty.

Spoon dressing into a large greased (PAM) baking dish, or smaller ones, whatever you have.

Bake 45 minutes to an hour at whatever temperature your oven is on for other stuff you are baking. If all alone, do 375 degrees. Dressing is done when it browns along the edges.

Here’s the dressing from 2010! Thanks, Facebook memories.

Why Be So Open?

I was rather surprised at how many people looked at my post about changing my medication and food patterns yesterday. If I were out to make money, I know what kind of stuff would work and what would not work (hint: self examination wins, plant pictures and book reports lose, unless an author tweets about your post, which did happen last week). But, I’ll just forge ahead and write about what interests me, and I’ll enjoy whoever tags along. This here blog is not intended to lead to fame and fortune, like some people’s are.

What about my PRIVACY? You ask?

I am open and honest about myself here on the ole blog, or at least I try to be. I know some folks who are not comfortable doing this, and I totally respect them. Maybe they have something they need to keep from their employers or family members, and I get that. Other people fear the nefarious spies lurking all over the internet just looking for information on them so they can do…something…with it. (I know some folks who have dealt with stalkers, and I get that, but I also know people who use some totally made-up name and obscure their location.)

I can’t resist sharing when random houseplants bloom, either.

As for me, well, my boss and family know all my stuff, and there are a couple of things I don’t talk about because THEY own their stuff, not me. So, whatever’s going on in my head won’t ruin my “career” (ha ha, I believe I have a series of avocations, some of which pay money). I do not intend to run for public office, so none of the dumb stuff I did in my twenties or forties will ruin those aspirations. And I believe in learning from mistakes, which requires a lot of introspection. I “introspect” by typing. So, here’s a blog full of that.

Recipe: Farro and Beans

One of our readers asked for the recipe for the one-pot whole grain dish I made last night. It’s based on a package Anita bought at Central Market in Austin.

Hooray. You can get it on Amazon. Farro is a type of whole grain dried wheat. It is apparently a much healthier option than rice. It’s also really tasty.

So, I made the recipe on the package (above) but added a can of white beans with the liquid. That added a hearty flavor. I also added a cup of carrots that were in the fridge. That added more nutrition and color. I added a little freeze dried onion and fancy pepper from Penzey’s. You could use red pepper or anything a little spicy. (If I had it, I would have used diced onion.)

The bean liquid added to the water in the instructions was enough to make the liquid cook down in just a couple minutes more than in the instructions.

This is the finished dish, as I showed this morning.

It was so good, and we had leftovers. I enjoy taking interesting things Anita finds at the hipster store and making them MINE.

There. I posted a recipe. By the way, one of our new succulents bloomed.

Other Habits to Change: Food and Drug Edition

TW: This is about medications and managing the types of food I eat.

The doctor I’d been going to since I moved to Texas retired recently (and somehow I missed being informed of that…guessing it went to some old email). She was a really nice, calm woman who never got excited about anything. She’d say we could try this, we could try that…what do you feel most comfortable with?

I’d been to other doctors in that practice, and all were fine, but since I have moved closer to another affiliated clinic, I decided to try one closer to home. Argh. Changing primary care physicians is NOT easy, since so few of them are taking new patients. I finally found a couple who didn’t have horrible reviews and chose the woman, just because, I guess.

My “Drug Habit”

I don’t like to take pills. Only if absolutely necessary. Photo credit *@erimar via Twenty20*

Yesterday at 7 am, minutes after I woke up, her office called to brightly ask what medications I need refilled and to inform me that “the doctor doesn’t do refills of alprazolam, just so you’ll know.” Well, huh. That drug is Xanax, which I’ve had as an “emergency backup” for decades. I generally take about 6 a year, maybe fewer, especially now that my panic attack issue is much better. So, I was interested in finding out more about that, perhaps when I was more awake. At least she didn’t say they were taking away my fluoxetine (Prozac), which makes me feel like a stereotype, but also makes me able to cope with stuff like a pro.

Changing My Patterns

This is the Blue Fish brand I still wear from the 1990s.

Everyone has some patterns in their life that could be tweaked, changed, or eliminated. For me, one I’ve been thinking about a lot is clothing. The number of times I have had to clean out my closet recently tells me that a) I often buy trendy things that actually don’t work out for my body type, and b) I keep gaining and losing weight, so I can’t wear half of what is in my closet at any one time. Then, things change, and I wish I hadn’t given all the previous stuff away. Now that I am just enjoying who I am and not stressing over my size, I do hope I’m stable.

I do try to buy clothing that will last a long time. I have been reading a lot about the “fast clothing” concept, and while it does provide some jobs for people overseas, I’d just rather conserve resources by buying things that will last me a long time, or can be re-used by someone else. That’s what I do with things that are way too small or way too large (depending on my current size).

Overcommitted? Me? Maybe Not!

I read a lovely article today about a woman who was overwhelmed and realized the work she was doing had nothing to do with her actual talents or things she enjoyed doing. She got therapy, pondered a while, and POOF, she’s now living on a goat farm in a yurt, perfectly happy to enjoy a quiet life.

Yurt, sweet yurt. Image by *@sojourneynicole via Twenty20*

I’m happy for her. As she pointed out, it’s not a character flaw to be someone who shudders at the idea of trying to “make it” and cramming as much as possible to achieve some new goal every few months or climbing the corporate ladder until you “win.” Knowing full well that most people aren’t going to “make it” or “win,” it’s probably a good idea to take comfort in more modest goals and aspirations that allow you to live a full but not overfull life.

Looking at the list of things I’m involved with lately, you’d think I am among the over-achieving group and that I am trying to “win” at something. Most organizations volunteered for? Most confusing schedule? I sure don’t look like a very good hermit.

Hair Color Hmm

I wrote last week about how extremely red my latest Overtone color was. It definitely was fire hair. I’ve now washed it twice, with interesting results, to say the least.

The hair itself has become more orange with each wash. And, as usual, my gray fades fast (more on that later). And oddly enough, my scalp was dyed quite red and continues to be that way. I guess it’s like that stuff for thinning hair you put on to make it LOOK like more is there. Thanks, hair color.

I am glad I had a spare old pillowcase for my bed and the hotel last weekend, because after dyeing it, it got all over the place. I also dried my hair with an old beach towel.

It looks better in better light. Note I have different glasses on in each picture. Hmm.

I’ve used the conditioner in the red for dark hair each time I’ve washed it. I guess it helps. However, my hands turn quite red, a bluish red, as you can see. It usually takes me multiple washes to get my hands back to normal. The other Overtone conditioners do not color my hands.

This hand has been washed three times. Hmm.

My advice?

I’d suggest that if you want to use the Overtone for dark hair colors, you also invest in a box of gloves to use, even when you wash and condition your hair. And don’t expect it to stay true to color.

On the other hand, the current color is nice, and will do until I re-up the red again. I’m probably going to do it Friday morning so it will last through my trip next week. And I will take the old pillowcase in my luggage!

The War Between Exercise and Nature

Some days I get quite annoyed with the exercise tracker on my Apple Watch. There are days when I KNOW I have gotten a lot of exercise but the watch stubbornly displays the “fact” that I just got a few minutes. Take last weekend as an example. On Friday I went on a long hike and my legs could feel it. Then I walked all over the Hilton. The watch did not agree.

Yep, looks like on Friday I got about 8 minutes.

Every morning, it gleefully informs me that I get two minutes walking the dog. And it does believe I’m exercising when I walk up and down the parking garage. But, when I walk around the pasture? When I take the dogs on a longer walk? Not so much.

How come?

It’s because of Nature, that’s why. These days I am completely incapable of going on a nice brisk walk, arms swinging merrily (because that’s how the watch knows I’m moving, as I’ve probably mentioned before), for numerous consecutive minutes. I was proud to do it yesterday for enough minutes to reach my goal, but that’s because we didn’t let ourselves or the dogs be distracted.

Usually, though, something distracts me, and not just the dog needing to sniff or do his business. I just see things or hear things that I have to investigate. There seems to be a bird, a bug, or a flower every few feet, and this nature gal just has to check them out, and most likely take a picture. I mean, heck, iNaturalist is always there, wanting me to add stuff and make my number larger.

Fire Hair

Most of you know that I’ve been playing with hair color for the past few years. It has been blue, maroon, pink, purple, and white. Why?

Who knows? It was fun. Especially since I started using this Overtime stuff. It doesn’t hurt my hair and fades fast enough that I don’t get sick of any color. And they are also excellent conditioners with ingredients you recognize. They smell like mint and rosemary, too. Nice.

Today I tried one of their intense colors made for dark hair. These have a lot of pigment. I bought the intense rose gold and red. I let Anita decide which one to try, and she picked the red.

I’m glad I had gloves. My hands turned really red when I rinsed, too. I had an old towel and plan to sleep on an old pillowcase.

I’m happy, though, that even my brown hair shows the color. It will be fun to see how it fades!

One day I’ll let my hair be normal. It looks fine that way, too. I just like having fun with impermanent color. I’m scared of permanent things like tattoos or piercings.

How about you? How do you express your wild side?